TTC for the Over 40s

[birthdaycake]

The first thread I've ever started.

Me age 41 and TTC since mmc in June. Anyone else out there.

When I have seen GP before she has been v nice so shd be OK. cece. that is a huge wait for an appt - did you choose the date or was there nothing sooner? If the latter, I am !!!

To be fair the GP I wanted to see is on holiday or something so this was the first available one with her. She is the one I saw after my last mc so wanted her especially.

Aah, that makes more sense then! There are a couple of GPs I like at our surgery and fortunately tomorrow's is one of them - I know form experience that although it's easy to get an appointment at our docs it's not so easy to get the same person twice!

She also gave me a bit of a lecture on the dangers of pg in your 40s though! So a bit scared of what she will say but at least she knows my history and I won't have to go through all of that first iywim.

Ah yes i remember you saying about the 'lecture' now. I am a bit worried they will tell em off for not going in after teh chemical preg - it happened at 4+5 and I got negative tests even before it happened, cycle back to normal straight away so i thought no point going. No doubt they will think otherwise!

tell me off even...

Off on school run now and then the library - I have 3 books I can't find - all borrowed by the dcs - what shall I tell the librarian? One of them we couldn't find last time so I renewed it once....

Hello ladies

May I join you - 40 and TTC no 2 for a year now - 2 early MCs. DS was so easy to conceive and easy pregnancy, so looking for some positive stories - great to read some of peoples' "more mature" Mum stories here.

Good luck to all TTC.

Liz

hi welcome liztom! we are a friendly bunch here.

so sorry to hear about your early MCs

hi jassara, where are you? how are you doing?

Roquefort, this might sound stupid but what is a chemical pg? Just wondering since I'm day 35 and no AF

Not stupid at all gem, although not sure I will be very good at explaining...basically it is like a vv early miscarriage, although the egg is fertilised it doesn't implant properly so the pg doesn't progress. But it still gives off enough HCG to show a faint positive if you test at the right time (early in my case) although this quickly disappears. For me I got a CB Digi +ive at day 26, then very faint FR +ives on days 27 and 28, but no +ives on other tests (can you tell I was worried...). Then bleeding began at what would have been 4+5 pregnant and was like a heavy period. From what I have read, more cps are being spotted now because of sensitive early tests, when before we would just have thought ooh, a late period this month. So, it could well be that this is what is going on with you, but in hindsight I rather wish I hadn't known I was pg at all. Mind you, that pg was an accident and without it I don't think I'd have ttc No. 4, so I am grateful too! Sorry this is so rambly, xx RL

Hi girls, only a quick post as am at mums. RL glad to hear things are looking +ive.
Day 17 for me. OTK was +ive on day 15, so hoping we may have been "opertune". Now on 2(ish) week wait.

Hugs and positive vibes to you all. May not post much this week
xx

Good luck juicylucy, and have a great time at your Mum's! I have been to the docs this morning, she was lovely and referred me for a scan straight away without me even asking! So I have an appointment for 1015 tomorrow which hopefully should confirm things one way or another. Am a bit nervous now and will have to go on my own - dh has to be at work and no-one else knows!! Still the timing does mean that at least all my other kids will be at nursery/school, so I won't have to worry about having them there as well.

Heron, how are you doing these days? Have you joined an antenatal thread at all? I might pluck up courage to if teh scan is OK.

Thanks Roquefort. Obviously its not my problem then since I'm only getting BFNs. Oh well, I'll just sit and wait for AF to come eventually! Good luck tomorrow!

Hi gem2mum - the thing about a cp is that it only shows +ive if you "catch" it at the right time, eg if I hadn't tested early I'd never have known, as HCG levels drop really fast. So I guess it is possible to have one without getting a BFP. Having said that I'm sure you are right and it's just a matter of waiting - there is a lot of waiting in this ttc malarky isn't there...Thanks for good wishes for tomorrow, RL

Hi everyone, hope the GP went well Roque!
I got AF last night on day 29 I think, so back to the drawing board...
Anyone else?
It certainly does involve a lot of waiting around this TTC, oh well. I suppose there's no point getting stressed, I know what's wrong and I know the odds are lower for me than other people with non-blocked tubes, so I suppose it's onwards and upwards.
How is everyone else getting on?

Hi there, Sorry about the AF rowing. Have I got it right that you are going to see someone about your tube problem? Is there a way to tell which tube you are OV from?

My AF's gone missing! Consultant says leave it another week then they will give me something to bring it on Not sure I want to bother with that.

Roquefort, I forgot to say, wow you having number 4 dc. I'm in awe. I thought two young ones would be a challenge!

I know Gem! Wah! I have to have to have to, phone the GP! I want to have a second opinion about some kind of treatment for the damaged tube. The consultant that I saw, told me, at the time of the HSG that he would definitely suggest unblocking the tube, if I didn't go for IVF. Then I went to see him again and he said, he wouldn't offer the option of unblocking because the damage was too severe and might cause an ectopic?? So I was a bit confused by all this. I phoned NHS 24 about it and they said to go through my GP; that it was quite a normal thing and consultants would be accustomed. However, I keep thinking that my original consultant will be annoyed and put a spanner in the works for me with the new consultant. I know that is silly, but I'm paranoid that way.
We do have an appointment with the, stupidly expensive, IVF people in July, but it's just soo pricey. The original consultant said we had better than average odds with IVF because I have a 'proven' uterus, my FSH is still pretty OK and my problems aren't hormonal, but physical, plus DP has normal swimmers, so that's all good, but it's soo expenny, and it could all be money down the drain if it doesn't work.
I can't remember which side is blocked, he did say, but it's gone. The problem is that if one tube is blocked apparently there is a high chance that the other is damaged, which could explain why this is all taking so long.
I looked at IVF outside the UK and it's less expensive, so if nothing by Christmas, we may be off on holiday somewhere...
We had our nursery day out today and it raaained, so the children were stuck in the softplay for ages. It was aaaargh! I just didn't like it at all. I totally respect Roque for coping with so many. I just want another little mate so that DS and X and I can have a little gang and go and do things together. It would be so cool! Sob!
I think I need to go on one of the huts of doom or something, so I can complain.

I had a weird dream last night about somebody else having fertility problems, and when I woke up I felt really depressed!
That's not good!
Just wanted to complain.

RL - any news? Crossing fingers for you xx

Hello everyone, just back from scan (and a whole morning waiting around - grrr). It is inconclusive but not good news I'm afraid - they found a sac but no heartbeat and the sac measured less than 6 wks when I know I am 6+5; no fetal pole either (not quite sure what that is but think they shd have seen one given my dates). So anyway they said to come back in 2 weeks when they would be able to tell for sure, but I know in my heart that the pregnancy will not continue. i am so sure of my dates and think that things stopped developing last week when I first bled. Just want to get it over with now.

Thanks for thinking of me everyone. Rowingboat, I think you should not worry about "offending" earlier consultant although I would feel the same - seems to me they never worry about offending us and you have to look after yourself!! Gem, hope AF arrives soon so you know here you are - agree that bringing it on sounds a bit radical.

I feel a bit to be moaning when I already have 3 dcs - seems a bit greedy to want 4 tbh..oh yes, and they are aged 11, 9 and nearly 3 so they are not all littlies - i couldn't have coped with 4 small ones at once!

RL - So sorry to hear your scan did not go too well. I had my first mc at 8 weeks and at that scan they saw a sac but no heartbeat. It was quite painless but obviously very upsetting. However - your dates could be out so wait a few days.

My dates are out from when I thought I ov to how pregnant I seem to be and I believe that I know my dates quite well!

I too was recommended for an early scan due to my recent history. Went for scan this morning - oh my god - I am expecting twins! I had a frightening moment of foresight as for some reason I knew she was going to tell me there were 2 in there (no twins on either side of family). I am petrified and terribly excited all at the same time.

Still very early days (only 6 weeks gone when according to my dates I should be 7 weeks) - so keeping fingers and toes crossed.

Lots of love to all you ladies - keep trying and keep all fingers & toes crossed for us all.

xx

Hi minmooch, thanks for your message and glad your scan went OK, esp. after your previous mc. I just wish that I had a clear answer RIGHT NOW - as it is I don't know how I will get through the next 2 weeks, pretty much knowing it is not good but yet not officially certain. Also feeling so so sick and tired today on top of everything else - meant to be working but have done nothing, have to pick up dcs later and try not to be miserable as they will notice. I hate being such a moaner but am feeling very sad and dh is not contactable so sorry for droning on to you ladies...

Thought I'd update the list. I haven't got on this thread as much as I had initially hoped (joined last November), so most of you don't know me, but I just wanted to pop in briefly to let you all know that I am now 7 (or maybe 8) weeks pg!

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