TTC through Donor IUI or Donor IVF or just undecided - all welcome! #makeithappen #loadsofBFPs!!!!

[kwick]

This thread is for anyone trying to conceive... or thinking about doing so through donor IUI or donor IVF. Nothing TMI - feel free to join, we are a lovely group here to support and help keep the cray-cray away!
Here is the link to the previous thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2688511-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome-makeithappen

Here is the link to the thread before that: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2587046-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome

hoping, I bought the First Response early ones that can be used up to 6 days before OTD. I am yet to use them but kwick swears by them

Believe me, I have many hobbies, including dressmaking, but they're of no help at the moment as I can't focus on anything for more than a few minutes! I'm even going to bed earlier these days to stop me thinking about it!

Karen it's nice to have you back :)
What new puppy have you got?! So cute. Puppies are hard, but they're so much fun too, aren't they?! My dogs five now and still acts like a puppy constantly

Thank you pez and kwick :) went out for my cousins 21st tonight with my family, and I'm actually frightened by the calories I've eaten (although I only ate half of what I ordered [with no starter or dessert]) - and I'm never normally! I've done just shy of 10,000 steps today though (thanks to my Fitbit for keeping track) so hopefully that'll give me a bit of leeway.

Pickle, I can't really comment because I've not had the stress of picking donors yet but try not to panic too much. Everything will work out fine and find it's own way of sorting itself out, and if you have to choose from a different sperm bank, you'll still find the right donor. Just don't stress

Kwick I've heard that cramping is a good sign - I've heard it's something to do with ligaments etc stretching and things?? I'm not a dr, but it makes sense! Did you experience this with your other BFP?

Hello ladies. You really are just such a lovely bunch. I've had a terrible day at work and it's so nice to read through your positive messages.

shoes I hope things continue to go well for you. This entire journey is so much waiting, isn't it? I am sending positive energy to your baby and to you.

kwick I am thinking about you and your baby. I hope the next scan brings you joy.

hopingi would be happy for a cycle buddy!

So here's my wild child, Molly. She is currently sleeping but that won't last for long. Busy busy. Love her tons. I miss the boys I have lost, but she brings me joy.

caution yes puppies are hard! I've had so little sleep! But she makes me smile and she is worth it.

I do indeed swear by them pez!!! Although I may treat myself to a digital one so I can see the weeks... this is like my new drug of choice!!!

I do not think I had same level of cramps at same time each day with previous BFP...

What a lovely doggy karen!!! Although looks very big to be a puppy!!! My nephew wants a dog - in fact my SIL made the mistake when he was about 6 if saying he could have one when he is 12 - thinking he would forget! Well he is now nearly 12 and he has not forgotten!!! Our current argument (the only person with a garden is my mum) is that you have to get the dog after the baby....

I think I've decided to put my dates back to end of April AF, that way I could book of some dates for scans and a few days when procedure is without getting in a mighty stress to rush to do March. I've emailed the lab at the clinic to see if any of their sperm will be ready to use by then-although there are some in Brighton that look fine.but also I can save a bit more money so if do have to pay for transfer and storage fees I won't have to go into debt to do it. I feel better that I've made the decision rather than freaking out that can't get nurses appointment before march and then be annoyed and blame them. Jeez life decisions are tricky

Welcome back karen awe your little pup is so cute!!!

Pickle - sounds like a sensible plan. You could always continue now to keep getting things organised and if it just so happens that it all falls in place in time for March then so be it. Having a relaxed attitude going into this is going to stand you in good stead

Karen - great to see you back on the thread Molly looks gorgeous!

pickle I second what shoes says. I know it sounds crazy, particularly from moi, but try and keep as calm as possible.

pickle I third kwick and shoes. I think saving as much as possible is a really good idea. Although I've now got money sorted for cycles I'm still saving as hard as I can so can afford to take the whole year off when I have a baby.

karen Molly is beautiful! I have a cockapoo and I always whisper to her she is my first baby.

Another day at work :( understaffed with looming deadlines with steers that keep changing means I'm not really looking forward to going in. Daydreaming about baby one of things that is helping me get by xx

Awww karen, I want Molly! She's so beautiful!

pickle, I think that's a good idea. After all, it's not long to wait but it's also a long enough time frame to get stuff done in. If that makes sense?! As I said before, everything will work out, so don't stress too much x

Hoping sorry that work sucks at the moment . Have you heard of Office Voodoo? I did this once and about 6 months later my boss was transferred out... just saying!!!

www.amazon.co.uk/Mini-Office-Voodoo-Blue-Mega/dp/0762418648/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1484735768&sr=8-1&keywords=office+voodoo+kit

Well (emotional rollercoaster overload) had a really long chat with the donor lady at The sperm bank,who by the way is a superstar!
My clinic isn't bothered about Cmv anymore so can pick anyone, she suggested one donor based on what I want who says looks like an older Harry styles, really intelligent but shy and kind! He is a newly ready donor so slots available at mo but she'll email if starts getting low-advised me not to bulk order just do one at a time and not to be negative 😆 So just got to wait till signed off on 2nd Feb from counsellor and I can get that ordered! Feeling a little bit more positive about it all....for now

pickle I''m glad you have had good news. Sounds like the right donor at the right time. Things will work out.

Hope everyone has a good day! This journey we are on is so difficult. It's hard when other thing in our life, like work, add to our stress. Hopefully 2017 evens out and we all have smoother sailing.

pickle this is ace news!!!! Harry Styles indeed - yummy!!!!

Here, here karen!!!! 2017 is OUR year!!!

Sitting waiting to see Dermatologist... not planning on going back to office.... that is so naughty!!! But I figure I am getting 5.40am train on Monday to Paris so just getting tome back early!!!

Oh lovely, lots of messages!

pickle delaying is good, it has to be the right time for you and this will calm things down a lot, so that good (I got a little stressed last round with getting the donor to the clinic in time to start my mess .(which was the cut off date!)

So today's focus was all about childcare. I know many of you plan to take a year off, but that just isn't doable for me, I'll be heading back to work, assuming all goes well, when stork junior is approx 7.5mths old, and I'll then have three months of reduced days in the office. I work 2-3 days a week in the office which is 1.5-2hrs commute away. so was looking at childminders v nursery, v mix of both.... and then the issue of could it be twins? (Will hopefully have 2 embryos put back this time) so what happens then? Nanny? Tres expensive!

Crumbs.... here's me, freaking out about a baby that hasn't even been conceived yet! But planning is my way of coping about doing this solo...

karen your pup is too cute, I hope it's healing your heart. Xoxo

stork I know most of the prices for all my local nurserys so don't feel silly about it. It just shows how grown up about it we all are rather than rushing into things without taking on board all the info. So good idea sweet x

Yeah I'm the same stork, I looked at nurseries and primary schools months ago!!
I'm in the same situation where I'm thinking of going back to work full time after 6 months. So I'm mentally prepared to pay the high price of a full time nursery. I have no family around so no other option really. It will be tough for a couple of years but I'll make ends up. And if I somehow end up having twins, well my only option then is an au pair girl (I've also looked into the cost of this!)

Also, in my situation (being a foreigner) it means DB (dear baby?) can be in a English speaking environment at an early age which would help I think.

So no, you can never be too prepared!!

Make ends meet! (So you don't call me too much of a foreigner with my dodgy English )

How are you doing shoes? How is littleshoes? Been thinking about you all day and sending you PMA.

stork!!! One step at a time is my motto!!! No idea how much leave I will take (as much as I can afford), not sure how I will go back (very hard to do reduced hours in my line) but am hoping that I will win big on Lottery before mat leave is up!!! Good on you for being so organised
Reading everyone else's comments am beginning to feel very irresponsible....please share your adult research findings!!!!

In other news: FINALLY completed my tax return... will wait with baited breath to find out what the damage is this year...

Lol kwick we must all be much more mature than you or just bigger worriers!!!!
Well I have no idea how long I'll take off but in our organisation you can get pay done so rather than full pay then down to half then just statutory you can get them to work out how long your off for and divide the money up equally so get same money each money rather than starting off ok then have no money-if that makes any sense

..... so how much do nurseries cost?

pickle that sounds a good policy. I have to admit I have looked at schools and nursery already too. I already know I will move from London back to Liverpool when I get pregnant to be close to family and I've accepted ( after wise words from a friend) I can't plan or predict everything that will happen so I need to learn to go with the flow for some stuff.

Just finished work and traveling home I'm shattered and another long day tomorrow no doubt :( I moved jobs so less stressed but it seems to me if they realise your competent you get dumped with everything! Might get relaxing bath when get home.

I saw an article in evening standard about how attitudes are changing and women are having more babies on their own or when their older. I thought I would get weird reactions from people when I told them but actually family and friends have been very understanding and supportive.

Most friends I've told seem to be able to think of someone else they know who has had baby as single mother by choice

Around where I live (zone 3 south London) it's around £900 but you can get up to £2,000 tax credit per year on childcare. And then from 2 years old everyone is entitled to 15h of free childcare. Yes it's scary how much I know but I work in mortgages and can't help it!!

JeeZ just found out that prices from the donor clinic I want to use EXCLUDES tax-so £800 PLUS 20% vat! My emotions are up and down like a frickin yoyo! Plus don't feel well as getting a stupid cold