Jazz up your ROC, Invoke a Wankban, Shake your Beaver and Find Cupboard Love with the Just Shagging Viroids! Don't forget to Cup and Run...it's JS 38!

[ChatEnOeuf]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others. Also know as 'the witch', 'bitch witch' and 'that one with the red shiny convertible'

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in! PONF = Pee on Nigel Farage. Self explanatory, who wouldn't?

ROC - Receptacle of Choice - what one chooses to use for the task of POAS. Optional decorations include photographs of controversial political leaders.

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet or jizz in the eye. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Shagging like <strong>Something</strong> = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession. Warning - this may happen to you if you start trying to POAS at 5dpo. PUT. THE. PISSY. STICK. DOWN. IT'S TOO EARLY!

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

SOTM = Shagger of the Month. Awarded with varying regularity to those viroids who go above and beyond EOD shagging in pursuit of that BFP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture. AKA Schroedingering!
TWPU - Two Week Piss Up!

Keeping your gingers = fingers crossed, yet another autocorrect development! Shortened to 'gx'

Doing A <strong>Lemon</strong> = Testing WAAAAAAAY to early!

The link to Part 37 is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2282306-The-37th-Just-Shaggers-are-on-their-way-Watch-out-for-accidental-erections-and-bruising-injections-polish-your-perfect-ovaries-were-climbing-a-mountain-and-digging-deeply-to-get-our-BFPs?msgid=52150588#52150588" target="_blank">here</a>

The current Grads Fred is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/2284897-20th-JSing-GRADS-thread-our-chats-still-filthy-just-not-in-front-of-the-baby" target="_blank">here</a>

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/health-news/the-dark-side-of-mumsnet-my-shocking-tour-of-the-websites-nether-regions-8905055.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">here</a>

We are the dark side of MN. Welcome.

wow lil that's brilliant!

how exciting lil!!! :) when will they implant the eggs?

Thinking of you lil! Lovely words from la - it's only right that you'll be pregnant together! Make sure you get plenty of rest and I'm sure Mr lil will be waiting on you hand and foot.

I'm dying to POAS but AF isn't due until Saturday! I'm on my 5th day of really sore boobs. But as much as I keep wondering if it's a symptom I also am sure I'm being stupid and just wanting it to be! The funny thing is that I go on a ski hol on fri - and the last 2 ski hols I've been on each time someone has found out right before the holiday that they are knocked up - so I keep hoping the ski 'curse' has struck again!

Other 'symptoms' are 2 days of stabby abdomen (yesterday and day before) and a dip in temp yesterday which some websites say can occur during implantation. Or it could occur at any time randomly during your cycle but I'll believe the first option haha.

Oh god I promised myself I'd never get like this, especially only 4 cycles in!!

hooya for you bat! now stop it!

Hehe thanks lil I need it!

How are you feeling? Not too much discomfort I hope!

feel fine sitting down, when I get up man it hurts!

Hooyah bat you know the rules!!!

I've had such a shyte day at work. I work with an absolute cunthawk of a person and he keeps making rude insulting jabs at me but all in "good spirit" and today he made a jab about having kids. I almost lost my rag at him and had to go for a walk I was so angry.

This is not a good week for me!!

Sounds like a right nob jelly!

Ah Jelly I think such jabs should be banned from the workplace

Kez how confusing for you. I bleed every time I get pregnant, sometimes around when AF due, sometimes a week or two after. Sometimes for six weeks on the spin - Indestructabean was a muddler too. GX

Lil Eleven little eggs, fantastic! Exciting times :)

Well I decided to put my mind at ease and just did a clear blue digital. Nada.

Oh well... Let the shagfest commence... Again.

Don't get me wrong I have nothing to complain about... I Just don't want it to feel like a chore.

I'm sick of all the calendar checking, worrying, reading every fucking sneeze and thinking its a symptom!

kez digis aren't very sensitive. I'd recommend assuming you aren't pg every two, and only testing when AF late. that is basically how I was after dhs sa results. it wasn't impossible but more unlikely. remember you have a 20% chance of pg each cycle so you are more likely not to be pg. I'm not sure if that's helpful or not!

good advice there from lil :) it's hard but we are all struggling together remember.

Evening JSers

Popping in to say hi and to stalk lil

Stats:
Fleur
34
TTC Oct 14
DC 0 but incubating an apple (15 weeks + 1)

I have a feeling this is going to be a lucky Fred

Yeh I get you. It's just so humph!

Better get my cape on...

Oh and dieting when af is here = not happening! Back on it now though!

What are everyones BBT temps roughly each morning?

Yay lil! 11 is great!! Sorry you feel sore but hope that'll pass soon!

Sorry about the bfn kez it's so hard not to let your mind get carried away each month! We are here though

jelly mine is around 36.4 pre ice and then rises to 36.8, it was 37.06 this morning after a steady rise since icing.

Just found out that one of my best friends is pregnant. She had to go to the epau yesterday but has a little 6 week scan and a heartbeat so although she's in pain it seems to be hanging on. So happy for her! But you know what it's like.

Popping in to share some exciting news hot off the presses!: no one in this house is having sex tonight because we are too fucking knackered.
Do please feep free to go back to whatever you were doing before this important update interrupted your flow. I thank you for your time.

stares longingly in direction of chocolate spinach

Oh no aus that's not good! I was shattered yesterday but still managed a lazy shag (and weidly DP says the lazy shags are the best).

Thanks jc mine are about the same right no she;s ok!

ok no idea what happened to the end of that message.

Meant to say its hard when people we know get upduffed, but I hope shes ok!

we're not allowed sex until test date! at least dh doesn't have to be forced to wank every 3 days now bless him!

AF due Thursday, this afternoon I poas and bfn :-( I knew I shouldn't have but hey ho, don't think it's going to be my month

hooya to you too Mrs!! what is with you all, your in danger if becoming lemons!

Hi Mrscat i missed your into post I think! Sorry about the BFN

lil that made me chuckle. When is the next step?

Thanks, was my first cycle but we have just been on honeymoon and was hoping that did the trick!
Oh well, at least I have the cats :-)