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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

The 37th Just Shaggers are on their way! Watch out for accidental erections and bruising injections, polish your perfect ovaries, we're climbing a mountain and digging deeply to get our BFPs!

999 replies

honeysucklejasmine · 14/01/2015 16:46

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

  1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
  2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
  3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
  4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo


ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others. Also know as 'the witch', 'bitch witch' and 'that one with the red shiny convertible'

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in! PONF = Pee on Nigel Farage. Self explanatory, who wouldn't?

ROC - Receptacle of Choice - what one chooses to use for the task of POAS. Option decorations include photographs of political leaders.

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet or jizz in the eye. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Shagging like <strong>something</strong> = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession. Warning - this may happen to you if you start trying to POAS at 5dpo. PUT. THE. PISSY. STICK. DOWN. IT'S TOO EARLY!

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture. AKA Schroedingering!
TWPU - Two Week Piss Up!

Keeping your gingers = fingers crossed, yet another autocorrect development! Shortened to 'gx'

Doing A lemon = Testing WAAAAAAAY to early!

The link to Part 36 is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2263704-O-Come-all-ye-Viroids-joyful-and-triumphant-Deck-the-halls-with-Contraband-All-I-want-for-Christmas-is-a-BFP-Just-Shag-all-the-way-no36" target="_blank">here</a>

The current Grads Fred is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/a2272951-The-JS-Grads-turn-19-Were-cooking-and-popping-out-our-JSing-babies-with-style-co-ordinated-changing-bags-and-a-healthy-dose-of-humour" target="_blank">here</a>

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/health-news/the-dark-side-of-mumsnet-my-shocking-tour-of-the-websites-nether-regions-8905055.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">here</a>

We are the dark side of MN. Welcome
OP posts:
Thread gallery
7
SunshinePickle · 14/01/2015 21:54

Name: SunshinePickle
Age: 27
DCs: only of the 4 legged furry variety
TTC: since Nov '14

Congratulations Purple!! Could this be the luckiest Fred yet?!

ChatEnOeuf · 14/01/2015 22:04

Purple!!!! Utterly brilliant news Smile Congratulations and GX for a proper sticky one.

I can't possibly advocate POAS a week after AF...unless you're sick, scatty and have explodaboobs Grin Indestructabean rocks.

Welcome newbies Smile

lildottie · 14/01/2015 22:09

viroids js thread 9 never got filled! Shock

jellypi3 · 14/01/2015 22:11

Say what!?? You can go that far back lil?? Those terrible viroids of days last not filling the Fred!!

The witch has eased off this evening to a more normal flow so it appears it was just one day of demon witch so far! Hope she buggers off soon so I can get shagging again!

jellypi3 · 14/01/2015 22:11

Past not last....

ZylaB · 14/01/2015 22:17

Just keep checking the sugars purple and don't worry if you start having lots of hypos, it's normal early on! Just make sure you always have your test kit and some sweets etc with you xx

ZylaB · 14/01/2015 22:18

Oh, and keep taking your super strength folic acid Grin

Purplecircle · 14/01/2015 22:53

Yep will do. Have got a few packs of biscuits in handbag and Haribo and maoams too. Also in the car and around the house - useful to bribe friends kids with lol!

honeysucklejasmine · 14/01/2015 22:56

Oh my gosh! Purple! CONGRATULATIONS! Grin Gosh, BFP on the first page! Woooooo!

Had a meltdown on my RL friends tonight. Snotty, but i feel better.

OP posts:
honeysucklejasmine · 14/01/2015 22:57

Oh, Purple.... Stats, woman!

OP posts:
lildottie · 14/01/2015 22:59

aww honey I hope you're OK. its totally shit but you will get there. Thanks

honeysucklejasmine · 14/01/2015 23:03

Thanks Lil. I'll get there, I'm sure. Smile

OP posts:
Purplecircle · 14/01/2015 23:16

Totally rubbish stats thanks to broken penis anxiety.
Only js on days 12 &13
Pant snot day 13
That's it! Appalling stats really!

LemonDrizzleTwunt · 14/01/2015 23:20

WOOOOOOO PURPLE!!!! Marvellous news!

Gx for indestructabean. Post a pic of the MFBFFP!
xxx

townsender · 14/01/2015 23:39

Name: town
Age: 34
Dc: angel born Feb14
Ttc: Nov14

Purple congrats!!!! So exciting!!!
lil, also very excited for your perfect ovaries Grin
jelly depo sounds horrible. I though my 12 years on the pill was bad enough, but that sounds hideous. Poor you, gx its working its way out of your system nice and quick now.

Nice fred, honey

Jcandy · 14/01/2015 23:45

Yes purple!!!!! Congratulations!! Grin

TinkerBlue · 15/01/2015 00:49

Jesus H Christ purple!! Shit the the bed, fuck me. That's a jizzing, mother fucking damn good peice of news!! Which fucking bag did you pull that out of! Good job I'm lying down reading this!!!!! ShockShock
Can you tell I'm pleased for you?! Fuck me, well done you sweetheart! Never did a viroid pull a surprise like that out of the bag before! Can't tell you how happy I am, or how many gingers I will kidnap and cross, human centipede style, to get you your sticky bean! Will do my utmost to catch you up next month! FlowersFlowers Waaaaahhh!

australopithecus · 15/01/2015 05:36

Must be an ace sign for this Fred of days! Well done purple. Bottoms up and all that jazz. Jizz, I should say.

CountryGal4 · 15/01/2015 05:50

Nice one purple! Well done you. So obviously this is a ruddy lucky Fred. Well all be getting bfp now right.... Right?!?!?!!?

LaLa5 · 15/01/2015 06:26

Aaaaaaaaaaaaghhhhhhhhh purple you frigging beauty!!!! Best news ive had in ages, congratulations!

Hooray!!!!!!

jellypi3 · 15/01/2015 06:45

Morning viroids. Man flu has officially developed into Ebola and I'm now dying! or at least that's what I'm telling my boss I do genuinely feel so rough though, and the cold has now decided to a tart making my asthma bad, which is never fun. I had a chicken sandwich last night to compensate!

purple I keep going back to your announcement and smiling, it's such good news. That must have been impeccable timing to hit the jackpot! How are you feeling today!

tink'your post make me lol!

I took my temp today! Go me!!

LaLa5 · 15/01/2015 07:26

I love all the newbies, they are chocolate and wine obsessed and already talking about jizz. You'll fit right in viroids!

Honey - chin up lovely, keep shagging (after af)

Purplecircle · 15/01/2015 07:55

Thanks lovelies. Couldn't have done it without you. You've kept me sane especially this last few months

I was fully prepared for another failed implantation like last month. I had exactly the same symptoms only the nausea was horrendous the last 2 days.

I'll put a pic on facebook, it's easier as I'm on the app. Those lines are soooo dark I'm hoping its a good sign of a sticky bean. Have to not get too anxious about it but I'll be on pant watch for the foreseeable!

Today we are pregnantSmile

gaggiagirl · 15/01/2015 07:57

purple congratulations! Jolly well done! That's beautiful news.

jellypi3 · 15/01/2015 08:47

This has really kicked the fred off to a good start!

How are you feeling Lil? Were the injections any different last night?