Just MC and ready to try again? Pregnant after MC and seeking somewhere safe to hide? Jump in the mosh pit for some serious metalling or settle yourself down in our padded cell. All welcome! (Part 19)

[Poppyjen]

Another new thread for some more serious metalling - we really are a chatty lot!

Here's to making it through the WTF cycle(s), metalling* like a teenager from the early '90s in the 2WW, BFP colds and other classic symptom spotting and hiding in the (nice and comfy) padded cell post BFP

If you have miscarried and are ready to TTC again, come and join us!

• For those currently wondering what our mosh pit antics have to do with ttc post MC, a fabulous typo in an earlier thread resulted in "mentalling" becoming known as "Metalling" - a far more fitting expression I am sure you will agree!

Welcome!

bauble Your 'it happened a week ago today* is ringing bells with me... I have VERY much been stuck in thoughts of this time last week/month/six months ago... for all kinds of things - current one is I know I ovulated 22nd December, the morning of which we flew to NYC so the baby was technically conceived either across the atlantic or on american soil (as much as the actual act of sex was at home before we left. Actually, I suppose it could have been at Heathrow... but that's not nearly as romantic to think about!). At first, I found the thoughts torturous, and wished I didn't do it, but I somehow needed to and now the thoughts aren't nearly as painful, and feel important to me in remembering him. I know, for the rest of the world, it almost instantly seems life goes on and our lost beans seem to fade from memory very quickly to everyone else, but for me, for now, he's still very present in my life. And I think that's ok. I also suspect with the passage of even more time (it's been 8 months since induction of labour) that I shall probably think these things less often. And that will be ok too. I suppose the message is - it's really ok to think/feel however you do, especially in the early days.

MsEltoe Seriously?! No poas until christmas?! That's no fun for us too long to wait! Although I am in complete denial about how 'around the corner' christmas is

IQ sounds like a fab experience. I'm waiting to see how I feel after my 20week scan with the nhs and may possibly have another scan at FMC for the expertise, time, care and attention to detail they offer. Plus a dvd and picture included in the price and the profits actually go the Fetal Medical Foundation to fund more research into prenatal testing/screening... I don't know why (actually, I do - I think it's called 'pregnancy after a loss' ) but I just feel such a sense of wanting to do the best I can this time. Which isn't to say I did any less previously... Eh. Also, this is DEFINITELY my last baby. I know I told you never say never but, come on, I'm 38 and this is DC4! :D

blue I mention this as a 'just in case' as I don't think what you're saying is necessarily it... but with DS2 I got repeated UTI's. Mostly, they presented as nothing much more than a dull, mild ache at the bottom of my bump - so no stinging/frequent wee's that people usually associate with UTI. Worth bearing in mind.

poppy I'm still stalking keeping my eye on your chart I wonder if perhaps somehow either has an effect on progesterone production or perhaps, given it's a diabetes treatment, affects your metabolism ever so slightly. Either way, I don't think the slightly higher base temp is anything to be worried about. Also... you possibly O'd yesterday! I know it's not a massive jump yet but tomorrows temp will be telling. Did you get any twinges? And good to hear the met side effects are settling well.

Wait. Why are there clementines hanging on the walls? And, oh, I see... jaffa you seem to have some tinsel hanging out of your mouth. Be careful when multitasking!

Shoot, forgot rollcall.

Should we have seperate lists for TCCers/BFPs?

TCC

baublelugs82, 29, married. TTC for 10 months and BFP on 28th Oct, MC'd on 2nd December. DH is 29 also but 30 in 3 weeks. Not other DC, only pets.

Poppyjen , 30, TTC for 10 months, MC in May 2011, Chemical pg in August and November 2011. Currently on Metformin for PCOS and due to start Clomid next cycle. One DS (20 months)

MsEltoeNWhine, 27. #1 - TTC for 17 months, MMC at 14 weeks. #2 didn't TTC - DD age 5. #3 - TTC 2 months, induced MC at 17 weeks, awaiting post mortem results. TTC #4 for 2 cycles.

leedy, 39. #1 - TTC for 10 months - DS aged nearly 2. #2 - got pregnant straight away, MMC at 12 weeks. Just started TTC again.

Welliesandpyjamas, 36 (really?! Already?!). Have two gorgeous boys. TTC #3. Recently missed miscarried and on cycle number 2.

JaffaSnaffle, 31, DD nearly 2, #2, got pregnant straight away, MMC at 17 weeks in August. Had break from TTC, just started again.

BFPs

Manda, 38 3DC aged 16yrs to 20mths, DS3 mmc around 14weeks, induction of labour at 16+5. 5 whole cycles before they settled down/lp returned to normal, BFP Sept 6th, currently 17+3 EDD 16th May.

Oh, September was bittersweet, for sure, bauble - Bfp on the 6th and my edd from the loss was a week later.

Wrt your bleeding, so you were around 8 weeks? Did you mc naturally, or have an ERPC? It would seem most women have less bleeding with an ERPC. It's also fairly common for the bleeding to seemingly stop and then all of a sudden it's back again.

But for it to be finishing up could be perfectly normal, and for it to carry on for weeks yet would also be perfectly normal! It's a case of waiting and seeing, which can be frustrating, moreso, I think, if you're not expecting it.

Have you tested for a bfn, yet? We generally advise it here - particularly if you're going to jump straight into ttc... some of us took many weeks to get a bfn and it can cause some confusion/upset if you test for the first time when you're expecting af might show and get a bfp still.

Afternoon Peeps!

Hope everybody is well! :) I'm a bit zzzzzzzzzzzz this morning as we were out at a Xmas dinner dance last night with DP's work then it was my turn to take DS to his swimming lessons which start at 8.45am YAWN! (DS's name is Kyle, I feel able to share that now as if there is anybody I know lurking this thread then they would have definitely guessed before now who I am.

Last week I said to DP that I would have been on maternity leave now if we hadn't lost the baby. It was quite a wierd and sad thought but he said we need to look forwards now and not back. I don't think blokes ever quite get it the same way we do, do they? My due date was 23rd Dec. My 12 week scan is on Monday 19th which is a bit of a head f**k as that's right before my due date.

blue so sorry to hear your news, did he pass away at home? thinking of you today xx

bauble Did you have an ERPC? It took me nearly 7 weeks to get a BFN after my m/c (at 7 weeks) and I bled for pretty much the whole of those 7 weeks (as I had some 'retained' products, what lovely terms they use!)

jaffa I am also doing the Chrismas decorations thing this weekend and actually quite excited about it!

far I've carried on taking 50mg of B6 in addition to my pregnancy vits (well, am still on the Zita West Vitafem which is her conception vits, going to stay on them till 13 weeks - they said it was fine but I just want to keep things constant IYSWIM). Am also taking extra D3 as I barely see daylight here (light about 8.30am, dark about 3.30pm and am stuck inside all day!)

IQ your scan sounds fab! I think they are well worth it! If things progress with this pregnancy I will definitely be suggesting another private scan to DP. It's a long time between 20 - 40 weeks not to see bubs!

msEltoe how can you not test, another one with willpower of steel! OMG! I'm a sad 9dpo onwards tester!

manda how's the cough this weekend? I know what you mean about significant dates/periods in time. I definitely spend more time thinking about those kind of things now. I'm also saying "if" rather than "when" the baby is here. I'm so petrified that even if this pregnancy does go to term that something will be wrong.

Hi towellies, leedy, poppy martha (hope weekend with in-laws isn't too bad!) and anybody else i've missed! Happy weekend!

Tentatively adding myself to the Roll Call:

TCC

baublelugs82, 29, married. TTC for 10 months and BFP on 28th Oct, MC'd on 2nd December. DH is 29 also but 30 in 3 weeks. Not other DC, only pets.
Poppyjen , 30, TTC for 10 months, MC in May 2011, Chemical pg in August and November 2011. Currently on Metformin for PCOS and due to start Clomid next cycle. One DS (20 months)
MsEltoeNWhine, 27. #1 - TTC for 17 months, MMC at 14 weeks. #2 didn't TTC - DD age 5. #3 - TTC 2 months, induced MC at 17 weeks, awaiting post mortem results. TTC #4 for 2 cycles.
leedy, 39. #1 - TTC for 10 months - DS aged nearly 2. #2 - got pregnant straight away, MMC at 12 weeks. Just started TTC again.
Welliesandpyjamas, 36 (really?! Already?!). Have two gorgeous boys. TTC #3. Recently missed miscarried and on cycle number 2.
JaffaSnaffle, 31, DD nearly 2, #2, got pregnant straight away, MMC at 17 weeks in August. Had break from TTC, just started again.

BFPs

Manda, 38 3DC aged 16yrs to 20mths, DS3 mmc around 14weeks, induction of labour at 16+5. 5 whole cycles before they settled down/lp returned to normal, BFP Sept 6th, currently 17+3 EDD 16th May.
PieMistress, 39 . 1DS aged 23 months. M/C in May at 7 weeks. BFP 20th Oct. Currently 10+5w, EDD 30 June. AM BRICKING IT!

Hi bauble I was still bleeding after 4 weeks and getting BFPs so went back to the EPU where they re-scanned me and it showed a bit of something still inside my uterus. They gave me antibiotics and I bled for another couple of weeks or so then when it finally stopped got a bfn about a week after. It was so horribly drawn out :( It was so hard to try and move on when there was always blood there as a constant reminder. I was so relieved when it finally stopped. My cycles were all WTF after for AGES though so I started going to acupunture which really helped, he was brilliant.

What a day so far...wasn't sleeping well so was awake when DH was up to get the bus to the train station at 6:30am so gave him a lift, got back and switched phone on to get sad news and then couldn't get back to sleep, rang Mum to see how she was etc etc. Did manage to doze again but it put all my plans for the day a bit up in the air, but I have managed to sort a few things out and make some Christmas Pudding Truffles (well, still need to melt the white chocolate and put that on the top but they're chilling in the fridge at the mo) and finish finding all the chocolate that has splattered everywhere in the kicthen but now I am soooo tired! Have had a few teary moments, especially when I saw a beautiful tribute to his Dad on FB by the son of our friend

manda I had also wondered about UTI as wasn't peeing as much as usual earlier in the week (sorry TMI) but was back on form last night...up for loo several times and pain better today so hoping whatever it was has sorted itself...if it was that...or if it was just constipation then things moving in that department too...stress can be helpful sometimes!!
So sorry all the memories of last year are flooding back...it's tough but important to work through i think...how's your cold?

bauble I had an erpc and took me 4 weeks after that before I got a bfn and a further couple of weeks before AF...it could be worth investing in some cheapy tests from amazon so you don't need to waste your remaining 'proper' test and they'll also come in handy for POASing when you're back to TTC

pie well done for adding yourself to the stats!!

Here's me:

TCC

baublelugs82, 29, married. TTC for 10 months and BFP on 28th Oct, MC'd on 2nd December. DH is 29 also but 30 in 3 weeks. Not other DC, only pets.
Poppyjen , 30, TTC for 10 months, MC in May 2011, Chemical pg in August and November 2011. Currently on Metformin for PCOS and due to start Clomid next cycle. One DS (20 months)
MsEltoeNWhine, 27. #1 - TTC for 17 months, MMC at 14 weeks. #2 didn't TTC - DD age 5. #3 - TTC 2 months, induced MC at 17 weeks, awaiting post mortem results. TTC #4 for 2 cycles.
leedy, 39. #1 - TTC for 10 months - DS aged nearly 2. #2 - got pregnant straight away, MMC at 12 weeks. Just started TTC again.
Welliesandpyjamas, 36 (really?! Already?!). Have two gorgeous boys. TTC #3. Recently missed miscarried and on cycle number 2.
JaffaSnaffle, 31, DD nearly 2, #2, got pregnant straight away, MMC at 17 weeks in August. Had break from TTC, just started again.

BFPs

Manda, 38 3DC aged 16yrs to 20mths, DS3 mmc around 14weeks, induction of labour at 16+5. 5 whole cycles before they settled down/lp returned to normal, BFP Sept 6th, currently 17+3 EDD 16th May.
BlueCrane, 31 No DC, MC in May - MMC found at 12w scan after no sign anything was wrong until then so had ERPC 9th June. BFP 18th Sept, currently 15+4 EDD 29th May and trying to stay calm!
PieMistress, 39 . 1DS aged 23 months. M/C in May at 7 weeks. BFP 20th Oct. Currently 10+5w, EDD 30 June. AM BRICKING IT!

Well here's to a merry alcoholic Christmas, AF turned up today.

So, there you go. Time ticks on, my TTC deadline looms.

I was supposed to be just getting to the third trimester and all plump for Christmas. Now Christmas is coming, but I'm not getting fat...:(

This is why I hold off POAS! Though I bloody hate pregnancy, to be fair, so hold off admitting it as long as I can... very annoying that I've been pregnant for 74 weeks of my life with only one baby to show for it.

Ah well.

Sorry about AF MsEltoe. Hope you are ok. Find the tastiest, loveliest treat big glass of wine you can and make the most of it. Sorry if you have explained this earlier but why do you have a TTC deadline and when is it?

I think we will be cycle buddies, my AF arrived today. I am not sad, we weren't TTC last month, just a bit apprehensive, this is the start of it all again for me.

Christmas is such a marker in the year isn't it? I was due mid January, and had visions of a big waddly Christmas. All that is left is a bit of podge from being pregnant that will not shift!

Bauble hope you are spared the lovely named 'retained products'. I had it too like Pie and it made the whole sorry business go on and on.

Tree is up, sparkly stars on the stairs. Mince pies for all!

mseltoe and jaffa grrrr for AF's arrival!!! And more grrrr for the time of the year/season being such a reminder of where you should've been up to...I should've been either holding my teeny tiny newborn or pacing the floors waiting for him/her to arrive right now which probably explains why (even though I'm pg again) I've found it rather difficult to get my head around Christmas this year as I was expecting it to be totally mini-person focused so what we would be eating etc wouldn't really make much difference IYSWIM, so still no idea what we'll eat on Christmas Day .

mseltoe am I right in remembering that you have a 'career break' deadline or was that someone else? Unfortunately the stress of that looming (if I've got that right) may not help with TTC so eitherway make sure you enjoy lots of vino and banned food goodies over the festive season and that you enjoy some special times TTC with your DP/DH!!!

marthas how are you doing? Have you survived the parental visit unscathed? Hope it was all ok and you're able to chill again now and AF not being too horrid to you!

Had a good cry with DH last night about my friend, funeral will be on weds but the family are in Southern Africa (where my Mum and Step Dad are) so I will have to send my regards etc through them as won't be able to be there. It will be tough for my Grandad too (who also lives out there)...he is in his mid nineties now and has been unwell with a heart condition for years (and getting a lot worse recently though still plodding on), for him to see such a good friend pass away who is 20 years his junior is so tough! Grandma is slightly losing the plot so may not quite get it all which is also v sad as she has always been so with it! I've definitely decided that growing old is not for the faint hearted!!!

Onto more cheerful things I am going to wrap my remaining presents and then we have a nice lunch planned and a Christmas Carol Concert to go to this afternoon and only 10 days left at work before I have a week and a half off

Hope evryone has a lovely day

bauble my bleeding stopped after a week, I think, and I got a BFN a week or so later. I was roughly the same as you, baby had died at 7 weeks but we didn't find out until 10 weeks when I had a scan at the EPU after spotting. The only difference was that the miscarriage had to be 'brought on' with medication (sorry, can't remember the name of it). I had another scan a month later to check everything was gone (although my period started just as I was getting up on to the bed!).

Shave your legs?! You do know it's December, don't you!? Wait til May like the rest if us

having thought about it, I think I had very light, more like spotting, for a week after the bleeding stopped, just TMI old brown stuff.

Bummer. But hey, nice legs! [wolfwhistle]

bauble I have some friends who have just had a beautiful DD1 after 10 years of TTC including several rounds of IVF (some private)...they were about to start things moving to adopt when they found out they had conceived naturally...I cried and cried when they shared their story, I had no idea that's what they'd been through and they'd stood so firm through all those years too. But it is so difficult and I can easily see how it could test the very core of a relationship. Sorry about the spotting BTW...I had it on and off for a while, it would suddenly appear randomly so had to wear fairly thick panty liners the whole time just in case which was a bit of a pain!

oo a shiney new thread, well done poppy

just marking my place then going to catch up on everyone.

and thank you all for the AF wishes! Yes yes i have had a weekend of red wine, white wine, baileys, gin, lager and CHEEEEEESE i have had brie, roquefort and all kinds of forbidden fruitiness. DH was that another month has gone by but we are feeling positive for 2012.

Right off to catch up on y'all gobshites!

Wow blue that really is an amazing story and very inspiring, not sure I can cope with 10 years of this though!!

Had a great time at the wedding, everyone was pregnant though so I had to drink all their champagne out of politeness obviously

AF also got me in full flow on Sunday morning so looks like we have a few cycle buddies. Must say, I am feeling pretty unethusiastic about xmas this year, anyone else feel that way?

bauble hope the bleeding has stopped and you are feeling a little better, everything you are going through is very normal and we are all here for you

blue I hope you are feeling better?

TCC

baublelugs82, 29, married. TTC for 10 months and BFP on 28th Oct, MC'd on 2nd December. DH is 29 also but 30 in 3 weeks. Not other DC, only pets.
Poppyjen , 30, TTC for 10 months, MC in May 2011, Chemical pg in August and November 2011. Currently on Metformin for PCOS and due to start Clomid next cycle. One DS (20 months)
MsEltoeNWhine, 27. #1 - TTC for 17 months, MMC at 14 weeks. #2 didn't TTC - DD age 5. #3 - TTC 2 months, induced MC at 17 weeks, awaiting post mortem results. TTC #4 for 2 cycles.
leedy, 39. #1 - TTC for 10 months - DS aged nearly 2. #2 - got pregnant straight away, MMC at 12 weeks. Just started TTC again.
Welliesandpyjamas, 36 (really?! Already?!). Have two gorgeous boys. TTC #3. Recently missed miscarried and on cycle number 2.
JaffaSnaffle, 31, DD nearly 2, #2, got pregnant straight away, MMC at 17 weeks in August. Had break from TTC, just started again.
Farfallarocks, 31, TTC#1 for 10 months, MC at 5/6 weeks in June, chemical pregnancy in September. Took a break from TTC whilst having some tests. Diagnosed with impaired impaired fibrinolytic response and PCOS which means I will need heparin in next pregnancy. Now actively TTC again.

BFPs

Manda, 38 3DC aged 16yrs to 20mths, DS3 mmc around 14weeks, induction of labour at 16+5. 5 whole cycles before they settled down/lp returned to normal, BFP Sept 6th, currently 17+3 EDD 16th May.
BlueCrane, 31 No DC, MC in May - MMC found at 12w scan after no sign anything was wrong until then so had ERPC 9th June. BFP 18th Sept, currently 15+4 EDD 29th May and trying to stay calm!
PieMistress, 39 . 1DS aged 23 months. M/C in May at 7 weeks. BFP 20th Oct. Currently 10+5w, EDD 30 June. AM BRICKING IT!

How funny we have so many cycle buddies! I know in real life women are supposed to sync but possible on a thread?

< hacks coughs like a possessed women politely in my tissue>

Still poorly. But definitely think I've turned a corner.