Just had christmas sprung on me!

[user39012]

FFS. Just ranting really.

Every single year we host christmas day. I've never once in 25 years had a christmas where we don't host extended family. BIL and his family stay for a few days at PIL's house and are waited on hand and foot by MIL and they all come here for the whole day.

This year I held out and didn't offer. We are in building chaos and we are all a bit frazzled. Instead we were going to PIL for christmas and I offered to cook there to help out. They live about 45 minutes away so we don't need to stay overnight. Unfortunately FiL isn't well and they have said that BIL and his family can't stay overnight. BIL lives about 2.5 hours away from PIL.

So now its proposed that we do the whole of Christmas instead and also host BIL and his family overnight - wife and 3 teenagers and a new enormous dog which isn't house trained and apparently can't go anywhere with a christmas tree or decorations or where cats aren't locked away (we have three).

I am so pissed off. I know its bah humbug and I appreciate that FIL isn't well and it would be too much but BIL's family have never once offered to host. In fact they've never even invited us to their house!

I might go full on grinch about it...

Be blunt and say you're not doing it this year, for a change. One set of relatives with a large untrained dog and you having three cats, plus building works, is enough of a reason to say a firm NO. And if they press you further, say you're fed up of always having to cater for everyone and you feel it's time you had a day off.

Can they do an airbnb.
Can they bring a dish/ dishes to help
Get yourself a delivery slot.
Go buy a frozen turkey.
Change beds snd linen now so it's done and not an oh fuck drain when you forget and have to do it on the day they come!
Buy yourself some flowers tomorrow and put on your counter to make u smile.
Make sure you don't get shoved over tonaccomadate their needs.havimg them to stay should be them duttjng into YOUR home and routines.this is not going to work if you can't have ur decs or cats!
Your doing a really lovely thing op.so now it needs to be about planning how yo make the day easier for you.
What steps to ease your mind and give you a good day.