Page 25 | DLA Wait Times Part 8 (2023)

gingergingerginger · 2023-01-27T09:54:33+00:00

It's looking like we're going to need a new thread. Good luck to everyone waiting for a decision. Our scan date is 02/11 so it could be any day now, but most likely another week or two.

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

FatGirlSwim · 07/02/2023 20:47

lillysmammy · 07/02/2023 20:36

Shes not a carer, she just suffers because we are full time carers for her brother. Anytime i make some time for her, like a girly movie night, something always happens. My son either hurts himself or has the biggest meltdown and only wants me so she never has any time for herself. I know I sound like a bad mum, but Im not. Im just trying to juggle all the plates at once and keep going. I have no family and my husband only has a sister so we have no family we can depend on for support unfortunately xx

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Siblings can attend Young Carers. They don’t have to have sole caring responsibilities. The care she provides her brother just by accommodating his needs is enough. It’s about space for her and meeting others in similar positions.

I know exactly what you mean though. I haven’t wanted my neurotypical child to go solely because of the name. I wish it was called something else. She isn’t a carer. I am.

Chaz5rascals · 07/02/2023 20:49

@lillysmammy just reading your comments and you are absolutely nothing like a bad mum! A caring parent trying to do everything for your lovely children and the guilt is totally normal even though you shouldn’t feel guilty! We have some similar struggles with our 3.5 year old so sending mum hugs!

lillysmammy · 07/02/2023 20:52

FatGirlSwim · 07/02/2023 20:47

Siblings can attend Young Carers. They don’t have to have sole caring responsibilities. The care she provides her brother just by accommodating his needs is enough. It’s about space for her and meeting others in similar positions.

I know exactly what you mean though. I haven’t wanted my neurotypical child to go solely because of the name. I wish it was called something else. She isn’t a carer. I am.

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Oh she would love something like this if its possible! Oh thank you so much for suggesting it I would never of thought it because shes not the carer, she just suffers because im the carer and her dad works all the hours god sends because I can no longer work due to our sons needs! I'll give them a call tomorrow morning and see if she can possibly part take in something. thank you so much again xxx

LeaMack · 07/02/2023 20:56

Befo · 07/02/2023 17:29

If it puts your mind a rest at all I didn’t send any evidence at all either was sure we would get a decline! Still awaiting official diagnosis so all I could send in was a statement from his nursery backing up what I had put in the form. Fingers crossed for you x

Thank you! That does help a lot ❤️

LeaMack · 07/02/2023 20:58

Scanner20 · 07/02/2023 17:33

So happy for all the awards you've got today. Hoping for some positive posts tomorrow.. 13 weeks for us tomorrow and really hope we hear something soon.

It's 13 weeks for us tomorrow too! Hopefully we hear something soon and it's positive 🙌

lillysmammy · 07/02/2023 20:58

Chaz5rascals · 07/02/2023 20:49

@lillysmammy just reading your comments and you are absolutely nothing like a bad mum! A caring parent trying to do everything for your lovely children and the guilt is totally normal even though you shouldn’t feel guilty! We have some similar struggles with our 3.5 year old so sending mum hugs!

In my heart I know Im not, I am doing my best. I think its because shes so self sufficient I dont worry about her. She makes herself her own snacks and things, bathes herself, goes to bed and sleeps without me even asking, even does her homework without prompt. Shes perfect. The guilt I have is that shes seen us dealing with her little brother and has done all these things for herself without me even showing her, like she needed to.... thats where my guilt comes in. Shes 10 years old, she should need me for everything and doesnt and thats my fault. She acts like shes a teenager when in reality shes just a baby herself. When I learn to juggle life and all its problems il share the secret with the world, until then I guess il continue to coast! xx

WreckTangled · 07/02/2023 20:59

Yes as above she doesn’t officially need to be a carer. It’s definitely worth contacting them. Plus other local charities for children with additional needs often run things to include siblings.

LeaMack · 07/02/2023 21:08

lillysmammy · 07/02/2023 20:14

Not to mention my DD who is 10 years old, hardly gets any attention, which also breaks my heart. She's a blessing I feel I dont deserve, shes super intelligent, polite, kind, absolutely gorgeous, everything you could wish for your children and she understands at the mere age of 10 that her brother needs her parents attention. She has never once complained. She can calm her brother down when he has a melt down, knows what he needs even though he doesnt talk at all and just comforts him when she knows it all gets too much for me. I couldnt be more proud to have her as my daughter and I know none of this has to do with the thread but writing this has made me feel so much better. I have serious mum guilt that im not being a great parent to her because Im trying to be the best parent to our son! Is anyone else in the same boat? x

I feel like this with my 6 year old :( she is a superstar! But I feel so much guilt.
She is between my 14 Yr old (who I have out the claim in for) and my soon to be 3 year old who is actually really quite difficult in a lot of areas, and due to us missing the fact that my 14 Yr old is most probably asc and we didnt realise until she started secondary school, I don't know if I'm just being paranoid or ott, but the HV is also doing regular checks on her to make sure it's all just age related and not also autism.
Between the two of them and being up in the night with one or the other, I feel my 6 year old is actually not getting a lot of good quality time with me :( but making that time away from my 14 Yr old is difficult. The little one will stay with her dad, but my older one will only be happy to stay in with him occasionally (he's step dad to her, they get on very well but she is like glue to me, not surprising as she lost her dad a few years ago)

LeaMack · 07/02/2023 21:17

lillysmammy · 07/02/2023 20:58

In my heart I know Im not, I am doing my best. I think its because shes so self sufficient I dont worry about her. She makes herself her own snacks and things, bathes herself, goes to bed and sleeps without me even asking, even does her homework without prompt. Shes perfect. The guilt I have is that shes seen us dealing with her little brother and has done all these things for herself without me even showing her, like she needed to.... thats where my guilt comes in. Shes 10 years old, she should need me for everything and doesnt and thats my fault. She acts like shes a teenager when in reality shes just a baby herself. When I learn to juggle life and all its problems il share the secret with the world, until then I guess il continue to coast! xx

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Tbf, my eldest daughter (21 now) could have moved out at 6 and been self sufficient! She was so independent and able to do so much for herself especially by the age of 10. Your daughter may just be the same and would have been this independent regardless of her brothers needs. Don't be hard on yourself
Look at the amazing job you are clearly doing with them both 👏

Nic1232 · 07/02/2023 21:29

My scan date was 2/11/22 I got a call from DM today and got awarded. He called to explain his decision, he was a lovely man. Happy to say it was good news. Has been a long stressful wait but finally over! Good luck everyone whose waiting.

lillysmammy · 07/02/2023 22:35

LeaMack · 07/02/2023 21:08

I feel like this with my 6 year old :( she is a superstar! But I feel so much guilt.
She is between my 14 Yr old (who I have out the claim in for) and my soon to be 3 year old who is actually really quite difficult in a lot of areas, and due to us missing the fact that my 14 Yr old is most probably asc and we didnt realise until she started secondary school, I don't know if I'm just being paranoid or ott, but the HV is also doing regular checks on her to make sure it's all just age related and not also autism.
Between the two of them and being up in the night with one or the other, I feel my 6 year old is actually not getting a lot of good quality time with me :( but making that time away from my 14 Yr old is difficult. The little one will stay with her dad, but my older one will only be happy to stay in with him occasionally (he's step dad to her, they get on very well but she is like glue to me, not surprising as she lost her dad a few years ago)

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Exactly like me, we each have a superstar! Except are they superstars because they are wonderful gifts or are they superstars because we have simply dont have the time to give them because of their siblings needs? Thats where my guilt lies, would she be how she is if I had given her the time to be a little 10 year old girl, depend on her mum for everything or would she had always been this way?! I do try and make time for her, bed time i always climb in her bed, we have a discussion on the day things like that. Urghhh i just know im not doing enough with her!!!

Snickerdoodles19 · 08/02/2023 05:42

@lillysmammy as awful as it sounds though you need to do what’s best for your child, it’s easy to say I don’t want them on medication but if it is going to benefit them then give it a try, my son is on adhd medication and sleep medication as it’s what’s best for him, he got to the point where he was up all night so I couldn’t get him to go to school the next day without a massive meltdown, the adhd medication really has been a lifesaver to be honest, we couldn’t do anything at all with him, he was going to school everyday and no work would be done he would completely refuse and do what he wanted as he just didn’t care, now he’s able to do a bit of work with support and is calmer in the classroom and at home.

Disabledmom · 08/02/2023 07:34

Finally my journey is on hold. Received bank payment.
1st November HRC LRM
No text no call.
Good luck guys
New claim x

kaylax94 · 08/02/2023 08:10

Disabledmom · 08/02/2023 07:34

Finally my journey is on hold. Received bank payment.
1st November HRC LRM
No text no call.
Good luck guys
New claim x

congratulations! im the 4th and was with a dm on monday, might give them a call this morning!

Vickaah · 08/02/2023 08:17

I’m the same as yours the 4th. So please let me know. Not that I think it matters at all lol.

JJS1984 · 08/02/2023 08:46

Disabledmom · 08/02/2023 07:34

Finally my journey is on hold. Received bank payment.
1st November HRC LRM
No text no call.
Good luck guys
New claim x

Well done to you must feel such a relief

Chocolateandstrawberries · 08/02/2023 09:09

Round three of finding out if my son has been rewarded. I hope it’s today

Mamajay8 · 08/02/2023 09:15

Just an update for anyone with a scan date for the end of November..
Ive just called them now, my scan date is 22nd November, and I was told I’ve about another 6 weeks to wait. Apparently they were told on Monday the wait is now 15 weeks long, then another 10 days or so once it’s been passed to a DM. He’s told me our claim wont get looked at til the week commencing 6th March.

Worriednow21 · 08/02/2023 09:18

Morning all, I rang this morning decision was decided to award yesterday,I never recieved a text so doesn't look like they send everyone a text.
Good luck to everyone else ringing today:)

kaylax94 · 08/02/2023 09:18

ive just called mine was sent to DM monday. said there taking 15 weeks so another week to a week and a half he said till i get a decision most likely.

Caz3babies · 08/02/2023 09:18

I rang on Monday and was told was with DM and wouldn’t be long I rang again yesterday to ask a question and was told it wasn’t even with the DM and at least two weeks before it will be so confused they should all tell us the same thing as this process causes enough stress without being told different answers! 😫😫 good luck to everyone who still waiting and congratulations to all who have got what our beautiful children deserve ❤️

Chocolateandstrawberries · 08/02/2023 09:20

Mine has been with DM since the 02/02.. so I’m hoping today is the day

kaylax94 · 08/02/2023 09:21

Chocolateandstrawberries · 08/02/2023 09:09

Round three of finding out if my son has been rewarded. I hope it’s today

🤞🏻 for you!

Chocolateandstrawberries · 08/02/2023 09:25

Nope nothing -.-

kaylax94 · 08/02/2023 09:40

Chocolateandstrawberries · 08/02/2023 09:25

Nope nothing -.-

oh no 😩