Omg hideously embarrassing tmi but seriously someone help!

[mamarara]

I had my ds a week ago, vaginal birth all fine. Got straight on the lactulose and did a poo on day 5 easy!

Now day 7 and I can't go - have just spent an hour crying in the bathroom as there is a turd the size of a house brick up there. I had a look with a mirror - its there, it's as big as my baby and it won't come out.

Seriously wtf do I do apart from cry in a darkened room?! I have already taken the max dose of lactulose today so not sure I can take any more? Drinking lots, eating lots of fibre. Argh.

Help me please!

Unfortunately once its that far down, thre isn't much you can do other than don some gloves and perform manual evacuation

If you haven't been fro a few days, the very first bit will be hard and difficult to pass, so get that out and then try again

I'm sure there will be others along soon with preventative tips so it doesn't get this bad again

drink lots of water. Relax. Breathe. it will come out...

Personally, dried apricots always help me, but, ah, what about a bit of manual encouragement??

Grit your teeth and bear down.

Black coffee? That always seems to help my DH.

Seriously try to relax, try going again later and perhaps not venture too far from home

xposts with everyone!

When you delivered, were you told to make fists and then hook your arms behind your knees to help push...

Go to the chemist and get some glycerin suppositories and some ky jelly, pop two in wait as long as you can then go and try.
a
Also drink loads of water, if it happens again go to your gp and have your pelvic floor checked.
Hth

I can offer no advice but will ask a favour - weigh yourself now and after it comes out and see if it weighs more or less than the baby. Please

If you are worried because of a tear/ stitches, then the thing to do is told press a maternity pad up against the stitches as you poo to relieve the pressure on them.

Also what sometimes helps is to hold a clean pad against your vagina and perineum as you try to go.

God FFS this is hideous. Am going to have to get some gloves on and the Vaseline arent I? The problem is my piles are so fucking enormous there isn't room for any poo to come out. It's carnage down there.

This is worse than childbirth.

Drink a whole pint of water and then (if you can) crouch down and bounce up and down a lot on your haunches. Then go back and have another go. Drinking water while sitting on the loo might help too. You could also try "breathing the poo out".

Good luck.

Or, just remembered, blowing bubbles on the loo sometimes helps with constipated children.

Lubricate, lubricate, lubricate!

eat some very ripe bananas too, that usually helps loosen things up.

Oh, and please do as FaithHopeAndKevin said.

Someone I used to work with said her grandma put little bits of soap up her bum to help poo.

Wouldn't use the imperial leather in her house!

What about a few pints of fresh orange\grapefruit juice?

Speaking as someone with a lifelong constipation problem and a weird piley skin tag thing, can I just say threads like this are enough to make me cease TTC altogether?

I was going to suggest the suppositories, soap seems like a good alternative or a microlax enema if you've got someone to go to the shop for you.

PS - and good luck, needless to say

rara!!!!!! Long time no see, hello my dear!!!! Congrats on the DS!

Currently 16 weeks pg (finally!)

Sorry to hear of your, erm, other troubles :(

Kiwi fruit always work for me!

What do accountants do when they are constipated?

They work it out with a pencil!

Bada boom tish!