One of my 11 month old twin daughters died 3 month ago and Imfalling apart no one want to know, even my DH has left me!

[summersun06]

I feel so alone and yes I still have my 9 year old and the other twin, but I feel empty.

Hi woz, no the childrens dad just doesnt want to know, the children are at his house tonight and I rang to speak to them, I asked him if he wanted to me to put his name in a Christmas card I bought for the grave and he said if you like and I started cying and he just didnt want to know. He has always been a hard person but he made me feel so stupid. All he is intrested in is going out with his friend and getting drunk. Not us.

Thank you Harleyd I just wish my family and friends were better really

He doesn't sound very supportive does it?
So sorry, but soundls like he is not coping well.
The drinking may be his way of getting by.
Were the children OK?

So sorry for you

summersun, so very very sorry for the loss of your lo. I answered a thread the other day to hazygirl who also lost a twin recently. I am looking after my third set of twins at the moment and have a ds of my own. I hope you find some comfort soon. x

Summersun, I am so sorry to hear about the death of your dd and how lonely and difficult your life is right now.
I had a premature stillbirth in 2002 and, like gggl says too, I know from the support I got from SANDS that unfortunately the death of a child can have a disastrous effect on the parents' relationship too.
It's one of life's sad coincidences that our best friends' first son died, like your dd, after spending most of his short life gravely ill in hospital. He too was a fighter to the end and we all loved him very much.
I wondered if your older dd might find Winston's Wish helpful - it's a charity that supports families, especially children, who have lost a sibling.
I agree with the others who have said that a local church might give you some much needed friendship and support right now, perhaps the one that held your dd's funeral. Even if the hospital which cared for your dd is far away, chaplains all know each other, and the hospital chaplain could put you in touch with a local church. Even if you feel distant from God after such a dreadful bereavement, Christians aren't bothered by that - even priests aren't IME.
I'm glad MN is helping you a little - I'd probably have gone under without the support I got from friends on here.
Sending you much love XXX Christmas is a really horrible time to be mourning a much-loved child

My other twin is wonderful, she is also very head strong and happy. Both girls love company and affection.

The surviving twin (15 months)is at the stage now of asking "whats that", its hard when both girls are at there Dads. Its only the 3rd time they have been away from me since there sister dealth.

My eldest is beauful both physically and emotionally, if it wasnt for her I would never have got through this. I cant let her down in life, everyone else has.

Hi summersun I am near Durham, I have twins adn cannot imagine how I woudl cope with losing one of them. I am a teacher so around for the next couple of weeks, could meet up, have a chat if you like?

Yes wotz the children were fine, but he has always had a drink problem (I didnt realise until it was to late) although I know the girls are safe, he is living with his Mam and Dad.

Hi Summersun ,i have just read the thread and i wanted to say how truly sorry i am

It must be so hard for you i cannot even imagine how you must feel.

I shall be thinking of you and your little girl and i shall continue to follow this thread.

xxxx

sorry that was a bit brief, got distracted by wayward dog! I'm so sorry for your loss summersun and for how you are feeling now. Your DDs both need you to be strong for them but its not easy when you're on your own. Leave an email address and we can arrange to meet up

its good to know they have their grandparents with them

Hi inamerrymuckingfuddle, I would love to met up for a chat sometime, although Im not sure I could see your twins. Im sorry that sounds so terrible after you are offering a kind hand.

oh god no I wouldn't imagine you could - just me

Im new to the net, is it safe to put your email address on the net as it shows my full name

can you set up another email address with just your nickname on it?

You can create a new account with yahoo?
use yahoo mail and make up an account with your MN name

then when you post use dot instead of . and at instead of @

so yourname at yahoo dot co dot uk etc.....

that way the internet search spiders won't wpick it up

Im so sorry to here of your loss also Mari, that sounds like a good site for my eldest daughter i think, the siblings can be forgot about, people never ask how they are coping its really sad

you can email me [email protected]

Give me 5 minutes and I will see if I can do it

ok i have one summersun0606 at yahoo dot com

Thanks Xmastime xx

hi summersun, I've tried your email twice but it comes stright back - can you try mine below?

summersun. I'm glad to see you're getting some support from our lovely mnetters.

I totally understand you not wanting to be around twins. Even being around people pregnant with twins can be difficult.

have you received my email inamerrymuckingfuddle