it's not a tiny minority is it

[noddyington]

I do not know any women who have not had something bad or intimidating happen to them in their lifetime. Whether that be cat calling, followed, talked down to, pushed out of spaces, pushed over for promotion, assaulted, stalked, raped or murdered.

I do not know any women who have not changed their behaviour to try and keep themselves safe. It might be walking with keys between their fingers, getting a taxi when they'd rather walk, covering their drink when they are at a bar, not responding when a guy intimidates/heckles at them because it's safer, run or jog in groups, don't wear headphones walking late a night.........

AIBU to say that it's not a tiny minority of men is it?

I wouldn't respond to Coulditbesam
They are on 2 threads now making silly, diminishing posts around sexual assault.

Either a man, a Pick Me or an imbecile

Well the fact you think all men hate women - I presume you mean the ones in your life as well.

@FriggadyDiggady

It was in response to the poster saying women also commit violent crimes not my OP.

Thanks @JoleneJoleneJoleneJoleneJolene

You are right and I will ignore.

similar thinking to Laura Gallacher, Camille Cosby, Bijou Phillips...et al

I also think that even if its a small percentage of men doing rhe really awful stuff, it's definitely a very high proportion of or the majority of men, who do nothing or say nothing. The men who turned down raping the French woman who was raped by her husband, the men who turned down raping the college student who was off heave on ketamine, who didn't get involved but knew what was going on and sis absolutely nothing to stop it. It seems for every vile man there are 20 more who silently encourage him. And the perpetrators know this which is why they're so open about it, they know they're untouchable. It shouldn't be the victims who have to call it out while other men do nothing but joke about it and only distance themselves after a guilty verdict or if it looks like the association may directly affect them

Thank you for this - I hope everyone reads your comment because they will surely derail the thread, tie us up in knots and have us question our own realities.

Apologies, I realize this now. In my defence the person you were replying to did conflate the issues.

I don't think your idea that many women have changed behaviour to be careful shows that a lot of men are dangerous.

That many women have had something actually happen to them could show that, but not necessarily. Because the other possibility is that there is a smaller number of men doing that kind of thing quite often.

I believe there is some statistical evidence that suggests that might be the case, and in fact for a lot of different kinds of crimes. There is a smaller number who are responsible for a lot of social chaos and bad behaviour.

I honestly thought things were improving, at least in the sense that misogynistic behaviour and language were becoming less tolerated. In recent years though, with the rise of the far right along with the manosphere, misogyny has escalated. I suspect, rather like the increase in visible racism, the people with that attitude never actually went away, it's rather that they believe it's now acceptable to air their views.

I think men want women; they want us and need us and this wanting and needing makes them vulnerable, so they also fear us and rage at us and hate us.

As pp said, testosterone contributes to the ways in which they act out against us.

Can you point to anywhere where I have diminished sexual assaults? I’m betting you can’t.

I think a lot of men think its their absolute right to have a woman not the women they can get any woman they want. I think they get angry at all women because they cant have the exact woman they think they deserve. Usually these wanted women are super models or really gorgeous. Because they cant have all and every woman they want they take it out on all women. They think that they are irresistible and if they try it on and are refused, again they take it out on all women. The most repulsive men seem to be the ones who expect the youngest most attractive girls or women. Look at some women's accounts on Instagram where they show the disgusting comments they get from revolting men who insult the woman's appearance. The men are really horrible but think its ok to insult the women's appearance. Gigantic egos that hate what they cant have. To a lesser degree we have to put up with negging. I didn't know there was a name for it till recently. Fat ,ugly slob men expect a slim,perfect looking woman and are angry when they dont get what they perceive to be what they should have.

What nonsense.

MESSAGE READ THIS SO THE THREAD DOESN'T GET DERAILED

I wouldn't respond to Coulditbesam

They are on 2 threads now making silly, diminishing posts around sexual assault.

And the girl in Magaluf, so many just so many where men just trun a blind eye even if they are not the perpetrators.

It's very hard to get good quality data on this type of thing. But very rough guesstimates suggest around perhaps 20% of men.

A sizeable minority.

Coulditbesam Why is your tone so smug and dismissive? What are you getting out of denying the oppressive reality we can all see we live in?

Thanks @FriggadyDiggady

Can you substantiate this with any comment I’ve made?

There are a certain portion of men who are absolute cunts. They are a risk to women. They are a risk to children. But they are also a risk to other men.

Most murder victims are men. Most murderers are men.

Speaking from my personal experience, a few men have been shits to me. Most men have acted neutrally or positively.

VAWG is vitally important and we need to take it seriously. But very divisive culture war spiel of all men are a problem doesn't do anything other than shut down debate. It hurts progress. In the same way not all migrants are bad, not all millenial/boomers are bad, not all trans/GC people are bad, not all right/left views are bad, not all benefits claimants/high earners are bad. The absolutism and division we are all pushed towards every day doesn't help anyone.

But if it's testosterone to blame why do other men not commit such crimes against women (or men).

I would also suggest everyone report their posts as they certainly fall into aggressive/unhelpful if they are a genuine poster

Another thing that is quite interesting is that men who are jostling for a place in male hierarchies and doing not as well as they want to will take it out on women.

Some interesting research on this in video games. I think this is the paper>

pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC4503401/

This post nails my thoughts exactly