To not let DS12 go to a waterpark with friends

[PumpkinPost]

DS has an opportunity to go to a water park with a group without me. He is non-sporty and not a particularly strong swimmer (in stage 4 swimming lessons). He loves water parks but has only been with me/DH.

I’ve never been particularly water confident and get a bit anxious about DC in pools - I always watch them like a hawk.I can even feel a bit nervy when they are at their swimming lessons.

I really don’t feel that comfortable letting him go to a waterpark on his own, but I don’t know if that is a reasonable judgement as his swimming is fairly weak, or whether I am projecting my own anxiety!

AIBU to think he shouldn’t go?

Swimming lengths might be over stating it - he can swim 25m or maybe 50m in one go, he’s not doing length after length.

Op seriously your over thinking this.
A lazy river is never that deep he'll be not able to stand in it.
He swims lengths which is enough to get him out the wave pool.

I'm guessing you are Scotland and Stage 4 swimming is the top level so a lot higher level than it is in England - Swim England goes up to about stage 10.

BTW if I'm guessing correctly you're in Scotland you need a PVG to even help out with one session.

I voted YANBU at first, but changed it once I saw they are not actually unsupervised. I think being able to swim lengths is stamina enough in this situation.

England not Scotland - he’s been doing lessons for years and barely progressed, most of the other kids in his lessons are aged 6-8.

It’s a water park aimed at teenagers and families having fun - I’m not sure you need all that much strength and stamina really…

Does he get much practice between lessons? That could be what he needs to get better.

But i still think you should let him go.

Just make sure the leaders know he can swim far or confidently. He will be fine. He's unlikely to be the only one who can't swim and they will have lots of people watching. Also is the water park even going to have deep water? Like at our local fun pool, the big slides actually go into water I could stand up in at 5f2. I can stand in the entire fun pool in fact.

Scouts don’t take parent volunteers just like that, do they? Surely they’d need to be vetted?

I have to say I felt the supervision of kids by our local scout leaders to be poor. No doubt it depends on the people involved though and varies from place to place.

He’ll be fine on the slides. Our local water park does have a deep bit to go through then a lazy river which wouldn’t be suitable for a stage 4 swimmer but the shallow bits and all the rides would be fine. I guess it depends on the set up of it.

He can swim. He won’t need to swim long distances in a water park
It will be supervised: pool lifeguards and scout leaders.
He is 12, not a small child.

You have anxieties and specific anxieties. Not fair that those anxieties should limit your Ds’s life.

A 12 year old going to a swimming pool which will be full of life guards, with adult supervision, who can swim?

Of course he'll be fine

Water parks generally don’t have deep water - the slides come out into water a few inches deep in most cases. Mention to the scout leaders that your boys confidence hugely outweighs their ability and they’ll keep an eye on him. As said it will be heavily risk assessed and well supervised

OP it would be a shame for him if you say no. He can swim! Water parks don’t involve swimming length after length. It’s going down slides and splashing about with friends. A scout trip sounds really safe and fun to me.

I see no reason he cant go and him having to sayI can't go as my mum has anxiety is not fair on him'

Not at waterparks!

Ask to see the risk assessment?
let’s the scout leader know your concerns before committing?
Also, in those types of ‘leisure’ swimming pools, he should be able to touch the floor at all times?
my 5yr old can!

You're projecting your own fears onto ds. As a result he's missing out on an activity his friends will enjoy. 12 isn't a baby. Give him a chance!

Going on a scout trip is pretty different from "going to a waterpark with friends". Flag your concerns to the scout leaders and I expect they'll keep an extra close eye on him. They'll likely have decent ratios for an event like this and there will certainly be a rush assessment. To a waterpark with no adults - I'd agree with you. On a trip organised by scouts - this is unhelpful anxiety.

Your title is incredibly misleading - he’s 12, can swim two lengths of a pool and will be with a scout group in a supervised, indoor swimming pool environment - of course he should go!

Your OP implied an unsupervised trip with friends. A scouts trip is completely different. Let them know his exact swimming capabilities and ask how they will be safeguarding the weaker swimmers. You will probably find they have already considered this in the risk assessment and have built in something like weaker swimmers don’t go in the deep end or that an adult is stationed in specific spots where the children may have more issues. As long as you have highlighted his abilities and they have explained the supervision plan to you, this sounds a perfect trip to build up his water confidence and for him to have a parent free water park trip. Don’t project your anxiety onto him.

Let him go. This is not open water swimming in fact it’s hardly swimming at all. It will be fun and a good bonding experience.

Let him go on the scouts trip! He can swim 50m and isn’t going across the channel so doesn’t need stamina, he’ll hardly be doing any actual swimming!!!

Where people come off the slides into deep pools there is a life guard to supervise and make sure everyone is ok.

you would be very very unreasonable to stop him from going!

Exactly this. Of course he should go. A group of 12-year-old boys on their own at a waterpark - no way. On a scout trip with adults and lifeguards present - of course.

If he can swim lengths, I would imagine he'd be fine at a water park. My boys have never been great swimmers but water parks aren't even about swimming. You go on a slide, then get out, bob about it the wave machine and sit in a ring on the lazy river. From my experience there's not any need for swimming stamina ? They'll have scout leaders and the staff at the park if there's any trouble.

All of this. Also, I think it would be embarrassing for him and potentially damaging to his confidence as a swimmer to be not allowed to go.