Just walked out on kids

[patiencehasgone]

Just that, really.

9 and 12 years old. Constantly fucking bickering.

Do not listened to me when I ask them to stop. Or listen full stop really.

They started arguing over a fucking face towel, so I said ‘nope, not having this be my life’ grabbed my bag and keys, got in my car and have driven round the corner and parked up.

not really sure what I do from here really.

I think it's time to leave this thread and put it to bed, OP.
There are some unpleasant posters on here who I suspect are twisting everything you say for the sh*ts and giggles at this point.

You know your kids are fine now, they will be fine tomorrow and they will be fine in their adulthood.
You're not a bad mum, you're just human like the rest of us! x

Look, I am genuinely not judging here. I think lots of posters have leapt to your defence saying you did nothing wrong. And it was those posters I was talking about rather than your own attitude.

Imo you did something wrong when you left the house without telling your kids where you were going or how long you were going to be with the wording “nope, not having this be my life“. Fair enough. No judgement. We all do things wrong. I do lots of things wrong. I try to do better next time - I don’t always manage it. I don’t think it’s helpful for hoards of posters to say that a wrong thing is not wrong and actually that will teach the kids to behave better next time etc.

There are posters saying they feel a similar incident from their own childhood caused permanent damage and they have been told to shut the fuck up and get over it, so no empathy for those people (again, from other posters here, not you).

I think something like this needs discussing, and working to improve the communication. This is something I’m not perfect at and have said on this thread: I lose my temper, I’m not a saint or a perfect parent, but an incident like this wouldn’t slip by with me thinking it was normal or ok.

I am truly sorry for the stress you’ve had today, and if I have in any way made you feel judged. I absolutely don’t judge people for making mistakes.

Anyway, the kids are fine. I knew that before your update, because obviously they'd be fine.

Glad you got a breather, glad all's well.

Except, that she didn’t say anything at all like that. She just bunked off.

I spent two hours trying to get my two under 5 to eat and watch some school programs. My plans for taking them out somewhere specific had to be dropped as it's too late now. I put my shoes on and walked out, locking the door, to get the mail. They were convinced I'd gone out and left them at alone home. 😭
I'm now lying down in my room with the door closed and they are ready and waiting by the door.
I'm scrolling and practising deep breathing. 😂

Oh well, never mind, the kids were fine and she didnt do anything extraordinary.

You're being a dick. Do better next time.

You have privilege if your own child didn't have to be a latchkey kid at a young age, like my oldest was at 6 because I didn't have the privilege of available childcare, or the privilege to turn down a work placement when I was unemployed.

You’re heroic. I mean it. If you feel better in a little while, splash some cold water on your face, one more deep breath, and when the time and circumstance are right, sit in your garden with a glass of wine. Read a book or watch trash Telly on your mobile. You did really well and it was hard.

I just wanted to reply, Thank you. 💕

Oh come on. You're just making stuff up now! 😆

I'm frazzled too, OP. Week 7 of 8 and my 5DC are ready for school, we are all craving routine and structure. 🫠

Honestly for all you posters talking about emotional abuse this is what’s wrong with society today. Dramatising things like this and wasting resources.
What OP did was a positive thing to protect her own MH and calm down before she actually said something more likely to be upsetting.
And gave a message to the dc that their behaviour was unacceptable and this is a consequence.
Seems that more of this is needed today to stop producing entitled little shits or wall flowers who can’t cope with life.

You haven't done anything wrong. There you go.

There are nasty people on this site who genuinely believe they're Mother Theresa and that you are the worst mother, mentally unstable and everything else.

You're not! Kids can be brats and sometimes they need to know they're brats in order for them to re-evaluate and become better members of society. "There, there, Peter share nicely" when they're being little s**theads and constantly bickeirng doesn't work.

At 9 and 12 they're old enough to be left for half an hour or so and if it calms you down and gives them a different perspective then it's good.

Don't beat yourself up or indeed let some of of the nasty posters tell you you were wrong, you really weren't.

Why are you giving them “warning after warning,” as you say? One warning and then follow through with a consequence. If you are consistent with that, it’ll help.

And leaving was wrong whether it harmed your children or not.

Ignore all the shitty comments OP.
Clearly all the 'perfect' and emotionally balanced parents are online atm 🙄
You snapped and temporarily removed yourself from the situation. Your children are 9 and 12, not 2 and 5 ffs! Oh and SS wouldn't be interested in this BTW. They actually have real cases of abuse to deal with......
Reflect on it and make a plan as to how you can perhaps prevent it from escalating to this level in the future.
You are a good mum.

Can you access parenting courses for support in managing your kids behaviour? And counselling as support for yourself?

There are nasty people on this site who genuinely believe they're Mother Theresa and that you are the worst mother, mentally unstable and everything else.

literally nobody said that!!!! 🤦🏼‍♀️

Love all these perfect parents 🙄

I have similar age kids and understand OP!
Hopefully this will shock them a bit into behaving.
Dont worry about them being alone, theyre not toddlers fgs, the pearl clutching on this thread!
When you speak to them let them know how much it upsets you. Mine only ‘get it’ after I’ve got upset. They get caught up in their squabbling and don’t realise the impact it has on their lovely mum.

And the poster isn't saying anyone said that is she?
She's saying people BELIEVE that which is evident in the various holier-than -thou and blaming posts on this thread.

And if anyone has ever worked in any capacity with young children they would know that this doesn't in any way compare to the many genuine cases of abuse and neglect out there.

As a pp said, the pearl clutching on this thread is something else.

Speaking as one of the people who has been vocal against walking out on your kids I certainly do not think I’m Mother Theresa, nor am I nasty, I have never suggested the OP is the ‘worst mother’ and I’ve no idea where the assertion of anyone believing anyone is mentally ill has come from. It’s just more hyperbolic nonsense.

Almost the same as the "hyperbolic nonsense" telling the OP she has been emotionally abusive and that her children have been permanently damaged by her behaviour you mean?

Actually, I wasn't referring to you at all with any of my comments, I hadn't actually read your posts when I wrote that. OP felt a need in one of their posts to state that they had no mental health issues which in turn suggested someone implied she had.

There are a lot of "perfect mums" on here who never get angry, always do the right thing and sit in judgment on others. They do come across "holier than thou".

I'm sorry if you thought this post was about you, I can assure you that it really wasn't.