AIBU to expect my parents to manage one vegan barbecue meal?

[veganbbqdrama]

Surely most people can survive if they have just one vegan meal ???!!!

My parents have decided they don’t think they can attend a bbq at my house due to the fact we are a vegan family and they are worried about ‘nutrition gaps’ !!!

Neither have any health conditions.

It’s one meal and we are offering a wide variety of things plus desserts. I said to then if they don’t fancy it that’s fine but they said it’s because they are worried about the food, and asked could they bring their own (no! ) or would I get them a few bits they can eat (non vegan) to which I said I can’t have it in the house.

Surely they could just come for a drink and eat later at home ? They are making such a fuss ?? It’s not like we are pushing veganism or the ethics behind our choice we weren’t planning on talking about it just having a nice family get together !

Nor me. I bet they’re the ones who make their guests take their shoes off too.

What's a proper meal for you @Jopo12 ?

Agree. I'd go if I really had to but I'd rather not.

Sure, children evolve. But why should parents be expected to evolve with them? My parents are both dead now but when they visited I never fed them anything they would not enjoy eating
BBQs are outside. The OP has not been back to explain why the parents cannot have their preferred food in her precious meat-free garden. That's not evolving. It's being a militant arsehole

Off topic but could I get your vegan cheesecake recipe? 😂. I volunteer catering at events and always feel bad the vegans miss out on puddings a lot

I have eaten vegetarian food and have even cooked vegan meals. I can't say its great cuisine. I think both you and your parents are being unreasonable. They could suffer it for one afternoon. However, if you were going to someone's house you would expect them to cater for your chosen diet, but you are not willing to do the same.

@MyNewMaker - not a cheesecake recipe, but did you know you can make meringues using aqua farba - the water from canned chickpeas? They don’t taste any different to meringues made with egg white, and you could serve them with oat cream and fruit. I even saw macarons made with aqua farba, at a macaron making class - they were a little flatter than egg white ones, but otherwise the same.

It's a fairly militant arsehole who faced with several choices of main, several choices of side and two puddings (which would have taken hours of careful shopping, prep, cooking and serving) cannot find one thing to eat.

As I say, if my parents hadn't evolved with me they'd have been knocking on my door when I was 50 with a bucket of Lego and some pink Nesquik.

Lol what?

Is back garden BBQ food in general great cuisine?

Meat often makes vegan feel physically sick, smell, sight and feel, so I can understand why they don't want it at their house.

Same with me and someone smoking at my house (even in the graden) - never going to happen.

I realise slightly off topic, just curious do you check peoples smoking status before becoming friends with them.

But meat eaters can eat vegan meals but vegans can't eat meat.

This post makes me think of cave man Robin from Ghosts whose favourite food is 'bum and chips'. When asked which type of bum he replied, 'Any bum.'

It can be with a green egg bbq or a hickory smoker. Honestly, it can be stunning!! 🤩

Your food sounds like it will be delicious and covering all the bases nutritionally.

Even if there were nutrition gaps, one meal without corpse, cow juice & hens' periods wouldn't give them a nutritional deficit.

It’s wild that people would be starving even after eating presumably unrestricted amounts of food, even vegan food. Surely that must be a medical condition?
The comments about growing up are interesting- my parents and most of my friends had a ‘that or nothing’ approach to meals, so not flexible at all. I never liked meat or eggs and was forced to eat both or go hungry. Aldo feeding the kids you chose to have is a basic requirement of parenting
I honestly think a lot of parents who won’t eat vegan food, or go to a non alcohol event, somewhere they can’t smoke or anything else are making a point because they are annoyed their kids dared to choose a different path to them.

But vegans object to consuming meat products for ethical reasons and wont want corpses cooked on their barbie.

How about something you would object to eating - maybe horse, dog or cat - how would you feel about that being cooked on your barbie?

But you are pushing veganism on them by not accepting what they choose to eat!!! You’re saying eat vegan or nothing! I assume that when you visit them you eat meat then? Or I feel they probably cater for your preferences as you should!

So yes, you are one of those holier than thou people. How exhausting you must be for your family members.

It’s one meal?
You can’t push veganism onto anyone by INVITING them to a BBQ. It’s an invitation, not a summons.

"eat vegan" just means 'have normal food minus something you might usually have"

it doesn't mean "eat something that goes against your principles and disgusts you".

So unless you are morally offended by vegetables which would be fucking insane it's just a question of doing without something you're used to for ONE MEAL.

Yeah they're being dicks, if they're that bothered they can get a takeaway on the way home! Will they come for drinks instead and then you can bbq for yourselves and they don't have to put the veggies anywhere near their mouths if they don't want!
Have you told them what the food is? If it was me i would imagine you're doing hummus, crisps and crudite, corn on the cob, salads, bbq mushrooms, tofu kebabs, some kind of pulses, maybe some fake meat products, breads etc. Maybe if they hear the specific menu they'll be OK about knowing exactly what's being served. I think some people imagine it'll be a griddled pepper, wallpaper paste and sand and panic!

JFC, critical thinking skills and basic logic would be the first thing I'd get on the primary school curriculum if I was king of all.

They can, they choose not too, it's a choice