Husband …we are not shopping today ..Aibu ?

[inkyspells]

Today me and my OH are going for drinks and food in a city around 30 mins train from our city.
I am at a concert on Friday and there’s a shop that has a top I’m looking for (we don’t have the shop in our city ) I plan on wearing it for the concert.
I checked and it’s in stock
So I said I’m just gonna pop in and grab it
He said “no we aren’t shopping today ,your off work all week ,go and get it another day “
I told him I know we aren’t shopping ,I just want this specific top.
Im literally walking past the shop to get to the area with the pubs.
So now I’m gonna have to go back tomorrow (1 hour travel there and back ,plus another train fare”

Aibu to be a bit annoyed ?
I asked him again and he went in a mood so I just said fine il go another day.

Just go and get it. You would be there and back in the time it took you to write the op. If what pp said is true and its already established that the bloke is an arsehole, you have to expect him to act like one.

Nothing to say, but I feel your pain. My husband is EXACTLY the same , he gets stressed out in shops and if he absolutely has to go in a shop to buy something he’s in and out in minutes. He buys everything online , his own clothes and if they don’t fit properly they normally end up in the wardrobe as he’s never bothered to send them back . I’d love to go shopping with him and him try on some nice clothes but that’s his idea of hell . He said he’d rather have all his teeth removed at the dentist without anaesthetic that go leisurely shopping . After 31 years of marriage I’ve had to admit defeat!
Just re read your post, can’t he just wait outside while you pop in , he’s def being unreasonable , but if you are like me maybe he thinks one shop with turn into a few shops …..😂

How does he acquire food to eat / survive?

You can change your vote any which way any number of times.

I have said you are being unreasonable because you should have ignored him and bought the top. Why did you let him dictate to you?
I would have said you might not be shopping but I am I want that top and I don't want to have to come back next week .

YABU to put up with this nonsense. Surely your response is “ Of course I’m not going to make a separate journey to go to a shop we’re actually passing. By the time you’ve ordered the drinks , I’ll be there.”

You could have said you’ve preordered the top and just need to collect it (so 2 mins of a job, saving on postage and another train fare) OR say I’d love to just take 20 mins in the shops, which pub will I catch you in later?

He sounds like a three year old and you shouldn't indulge him. His is you popping in a shop for 10 minutes going to affect him in any way?

I've voted that you're unreasonable. Not because you want to pop in for the top, but because you've agreed not to pop in when told not to by your husband. Utter nonsense.

Him 'kicking off' over this sounds like there are much bigger problems in your marriage.

(FWIW, I detest shopping. I don't consider popping into a shop for a specific item to be 'shopping' in any meaningful sense of the word.)

You're a grown woman just go get it

YABU to do what he says.

Sorry but bollocks to that! I’d be going into the shop and he can stay outside, get a coffee of whatever! Who made him the bloody boss of every movement!

Do you always do exactly what he tells you to do?
It makes no sense to go back a different day when you’re literally walking past it. He’s batshit.

I feel like I've missed a huge back story!

Is this man likely to try and punish you if you don't obey him?

Why on earth would a single top in a bag be banging into things or getting in the way in a restaurant 😂

Sod him. Get your top. Point out that it'll probably take less time than it would waiting at the bar get served.

Don’t let him tell you what to do, you’re an adult.

Just go into the shop yourself and get the top. No need for permission from him and surely he doesn't have to go with you. He could have a coffee, or do whatever else he wanted to.

I would have just told him what I was doing and then gone and done it. It wouldn't have been up for discussion.I'd have rejoined him afterwards.

Go and get your top. He doesn't have to come. If he then continues to throw his toys out of the pram about it then he's a controlling arse and a spoilt brat.

So you are literally passing the shop and yet you can’t go in to get the item and you have to go again another day. Ok then. 🙄

Someone remind me.. is Inkyspells the one who’s husband drinks too much or is that someone else 😅 I’m thinking of a honeymoon post.

She has posted a lot before about her husband being a complete arse.

Hopefully she'll leave him at some point then.

How long have you been in a controlling relationship, OP? The fact it’s on the way and won’t inconvenience him is mental. Why are you with someone who doesn’t like you? He wouldn’t stop his friend or family member if they said this so why you? God, I couldn’t deal with a grumpy guy, life’s too short.

This...

Like hell I'd waste time and pay another train journey.

You're literally going to be what? 5 minutes.