Husband …we are not shopping today ..Aibu ?

[inkyspells]

Today me and my OH are going for drinks and food in a city around 30 mins train from our city.
I am at a concert on Friday and there’s a shop that has a top I’m looking for (we don’t have the shop in our city ) I plan on wearing it for the concert.
I checked and it’s in stock
So I said I’m just gonna pop in and grab it
He said “no we aren’t shopping today ,your off work all week ,go and get it another day “
I told him I know we aren’t shopping ,I just want this specific top.
Im literally walking past the shop to get to the area with the pubs.
So now I’m gonna have to go back tomorrow (1 hour travel there and back ,plus another train fare”

Aibu to be a bit annoyed ?
I asked him again and he went in a mood so I just said fine il go another day.

I agree. Also if he gets in a mood, just do it anyway.

Sounds like the top is the least of your worries.

This is really weird of him, and a bit sad you feel you have to obey him 😐

It sounds like a very weird power trip. Do you shop a lot or are there money issue or anything?

Why on earth did you ask him? 'Just nipping in here for 5 minutes love to pick up a top' ... ridiculous asking for permission.

I am loving your name 🤣

@Error404FucksNotFound. I am loving your name 🤣

He gets ZERO say in how you decide to walk to the area you are going to and, if you pop into said shop to buy the top (as long as you are being totally truthful here and you are
not Intending on browsing for an hour) you do you. If he wants to go on ahead, tell him
you will catch up with him in 20 mins.

Extraordinary behaviour from your OH. He is not shopping you are and you have every right to go in and buy your top. Sounds as if he thinks you are taking off on a lengthy shopping expedition instead of spending time with him. Oh dear. Please get your top!

As a husband I would have popped in the shop and bought it for my wife. Weird that you pass the shop and he says “we are not shopping today“ . I hate when people manufacture reasons to say their partner is controlling, but this seems like a legitimate case.

Do you turn every outing into a shopping expedition? If not, it's hard to understand why your husband is addressing you like a toddler and you are obeying him. Please let readers know what's what.

Sorry but I believe this post is just a wind up. And find it hard to believe it to be true.

Your husband does not respect you.

He does not consider you his equal.

He believes he has the right to total control of you.

He has the potential to be one abusive, if he isn’t already.

Honestly tell him to just fuck off. Then u fuck off and leave him. Premanently. Who TF do these ment think they are???

I had a husband like that once. He advanced to being physically abusive over the course of the one year we were married. I'm thinking that things don't look too great for you, but I hope I'm wrong.

That's clearly not an isolated problem. Are you scared of what he would do if you just went into the shop while you were passing? What kind of hold does he have over you?

Just get it. It’s collecting something nicely shopping and if you wanted to shop then you can! He can sit in the pub

This is controlling behaviour. Does he do this in other ways? This is a massive red flag. It can be hard to see this when you are in it…Ask your friends and have a really good think about how you are being treated and how you feel. Controlling behaviour can get a lot worse.

Why wouldn't you just tell him you are going in and buying it, or just go in- it's not his decision to make.

“We are not shopping today”
”ok cool. I am though - bye.”

It's nice to have days that don't involve shops. Like days that don't involve using the washing machine.

Show him this thread so he knows how much of a controlling, childish, C U Next Tuesday he is.

You are an adult and you have complete freedom to buy what you want when you want where you want.

Are you bis property? Have you no free will. F what these dickheads say. You are not a dog asking for permission I assume you bought it with your own money. Announce your intent and then just do it.

I can actually see both sides. I have a friend who, whenever we go out somewhere always says oh I just need to nip into xyz to pick up some item. I obviously never say anything but it is a bit frustrating if we're meeting for a 2hr catchup and 1/4 of it is taken up with her nipping for something. But if this is not something that happens a lot then yes your hubby is being a di*k

It’s the MN weekend trawl by LLMs, maybe? There are dozens at the mo. I do report them but they stay up for some reason.