AIBU to feel overwhelmed by my husband's constant monologuing?

[earsringing]

Anyone else deal with this? Hubby monologuing. Constantly, all day, every day.

It's a stream-of-consciousness - literally everything he is thinking, re-enacting entire conversations he has had (pretending to do the voice of the other person too), things he must remember tomorrow, various ailments, stupid drivers, how hot/cold he is, huffing, puffing, groaning, humming, whistling. It is incessant, repetitive, there are no gaps, and I realise that I plan my life around trying to get breaks from it.

He is always trying to get me to react too "what do you think of this?" "do you like that?" and I HAVE to agree with whatever it is. A quick "yes" or "ok" from me and he's back to it. It's like he's checking that I am still paying close attention.

Thing, is, I feel completely lost here. Everything is about him, his plans, his headache, his sunburn, his job. There isn't a moment for me. If I do speak, I can get roughly half a sentence out before he tells me "I know that already" or "that reminds me of a time when I .......", or how he's done it better or knows better ... and bam we are back to him again.

I might be peri - I might be over-sensitive? But I am forgetting who "I" am. I feel like I just don't matter anymore, because he is so great and wonderful and interesting and has done everything just far more brilliantly than anyone else. He has lost all sight of me being a person with my own thoughts and opinions (which - shock - might be different from his sometimes!). Arggghhhh. What can I do? I feel like I am going mad.

But so what if you have World War III?
You can't carry on living like this

This 👆 Are you afraid of him @earsringing ?

My dad does this but he lives very far away. He likes to face time and then monologues about his day and will constant check what I’m doing, what’s that noise, who entered the room. He tells me about his mental health, his bowels, his sleep. Barely asks me a question about myself. And there always seems to be a judgemental comment or one-up-man-ship. It was causing me stress so I started grey rocking and he gets bored and phones someone else.

He uses people for emotional regulation and reassurance and will dump on you then tell you after how much better and lighter he feels whilst you feel like crap.

He does have ADHD and will use that as an excuse for any and everything, I probably also have it but I try to be self aware and not selfish.

I just came across this. The algorithm is strong this evening.
https://vm.tiktok.com/ZNREMdpo9/

Would it be wrong to get a copy of this and frame it

Does no-one ever tell him to shut up?

Omg Just " can you hear me hello, hello , " was enough to give me the rage with my ex.i could always bloody hear him but he never took a breath to hear me say yes.i used to hang up on him and blame bad signal.

I got a bollocking yesterday for not answering the phone when I was out. He said he was going fishing. Turns out he didn't. Came home, found me gone and thought he'd phone me. 🙄

This.

You’re putting up with his behaviour, which you hate, yet you’re afraid to say so to him - it doesn’t sound a very fair relationship, and you deserve better.

Not sure if all SSRIs have verbosity & self-absorption as a side effect, but paroxetine (paxil) certainly does in my personal experience. Perhaps any drug prescribed for “social anxiety disorder” will have similar effects?