“All the trimmings” - to find this quite vile?

[Penelopefly]

I’m away with my boyfriend at the weekend. In the course of messaging about our respective days, I’ve mentioned I am starting to pack. He said ‘remember some nice lingerie with all the trimmings’. I queried what trimmings meant - he clarified stockings and suspenders.

I feel like a piece of meat!

Oh I was talking to all of womankind. Ice hockey player, hmm...

Not really. I’m happy to accommodate my husband’s preferences, as he’s happy to accommodate mine. Bit of give and take and all that. It’s hardly a weapon of torture.

It’s the “all the trimmings” bit that sounds really bad.

However, some women absolutely adore the thrill of slipping into lingerie with full suspenders.

You know who you are!

This has blown my mind.
Completely understand people not wanting to wear nice lingerie- but a vile request? Surely not 🤣

It's funny how different people are. Someone saying that would give the right ick 🤮

All the trimmings?

I'd be bringing stuffing balls, cauliflower cheese and pigs in blankets.

Sorry- you think wearing stocking and suspenders makes you a sex worker?

This instantly gave me the ick....i hate being told what to wear to make things sexy...it needs to be spontaneous! The fact that he said 'all the trimmings' made me cringe

Honestly don't see the problem. It's just a goofy joke type thing guys say.

"Trimmings" That's really the Ick isn't it?

Ask him if he's been reading too much Jilly Cooper... the early ones written in the 80s.

Alternatively, you could play him at his own game and say you've packed your (insert name of some over the top or scarey "trimmings" for him) and see if he panics.

I think maybe communication needs to be a priority.

This may be unpopular but some of the responses here are the reasons that OF and online SW is thriving- these men are lonely and their partners don’t communicate/listen to them in general but also with their sexual needs- Im sure women are the same but may have different approaches to meeting that need!

You only have to watch Olivia Attwood to come to that conclusion!

Just tell him he could maybe phrase things a little bit differently and don’t do anything that you are not comfortable with- if you can not get on the same page with sexual boundaries- its game over!!

Good Luck

This thread reads like a parody in Viz.

If that boyfriend has enough self-respect he should end it after being spoken to like that by the OP.

Hell I would have basque, suspenders and stockings packed for a weekend away!! Think maybe you 2 aren't sexually compatible but if you are willing and he likes it why not? Getting to know your partner and exploring different things is good. As long as you can both say no to things that make you uncomfortable or do nothing for you then great. Vanilla sex is great but so is a little spicy sex sometimes. Nothing wrong with stockings and suspenders and as I said I love a basque. I wear them because it makes me feel good not for anyone else but if they get pleasure from it then win win 😉@

Was looking forward to a thread about Sunday lunch!
Anyway, what special thing is he doing for you?

All I can think about is those little paper crowns they put on poultry

🤮

He, like many men, do seem to find stockings sexy and I've always been happy to wear them, though he didn't ask,I just know he likes them.

Yes, to actually say and expect it could be seen as a turn off but also interpreted that he would love it. In return, ask him to wear a mankini or sth you would you would find sexy.

I wouldn't have a problem with the suggestion, but his wording is 🤢

You only wear lingerie “sometimes”?

I buy them for example. And I can’t be alone as I don’t have enough to sustain an industry. 🤣

I genuinely thought you were on about a roast dinner 🤣

I meant sexy lingerie. I think that's obvious, don't be obtuse.

I wore them in the 80s/90s and shock horror may have donned crotch less knickers too for added spice

I definitely remember wearing stockings and suspenders from the mid 80s to early 90s before moving onto hold ups 😁

I still have them well, they have a string of pearls in that area. The scandal!

It is quite a long time since they were standard underwear (as in everyday) but a lot of women, of all ages, do buy them (worked in a shop and an online company so can confirm all age groups). Some women find them more comfortable, apparently. Less sweaty, I guess, though I wouldn't bother with them or tights most of the time! Obviously no one has to wear anything they don't want, but I wouldn't say it's weird.