AIBU to think DD’s ‘friend’ got a buzz cut to spite her?

[RedBear685]

My 22 year old DD has a male ‘friend’ who she has been on and off in a situationship with for a few months, they were friends before that.
On Wednesday she had a few girlfriends over as well as him and were just randomly discussing hairstyles. All the girls including DD mentioned they don’t like buzz cuts and then that was that. Yesterday, he came over to pick up DD to go out and he had been to the barbers and had a buzz cut! Only 3 days after he heard that DD and the other girls mentioned they don’t like them, he got one. I thought it was weird. He had really attractive blond wavy hair and he got rid of it for what?

AIBU to think this was quite narcissistic and he wanted to spite her, could be a bit of a stretch but perhaps even slightly misogynistic. Some males often do try to put down things women like and I’ve seen an increase in these buzz cuts recently.

Am I thinking too much into it or was he being spiteful? It’s just really irked me!

Why would it be spiteful? Perhaps he was pissed off sat in a room full of women casting judgement on men based on appearance. I mean, I sat with a group of men judging womens hair styles I might want to give them a little fuck you too!

Swap the sexes here and everyone would be cheering for the girl.

Umm, not everything is about you, or your DD.

@WonderingWanda they we’re not casting judgement, they were just mentioning their preferences, which is a normal thing to have.

I think you're paranoid and too invested in your adult Dds friend/situation ships.

So wait, you think this guy is narcissistic and mysogynistic for getting his hair cut?

Can you imagine if your daughter got her hair cut into a style he didn’t like, and he took it this badly… you’d be righly calling him a controlling asshole.

'Could' be a bit of a stretch!' 🤣🤣

So he's shagging your DD on and off and that means he should ask her permission to change his hairstyle?

Bonkers lol.

What is the narcissistic behaviour here? I think the girls were expressing preferences on haircuts which is allowed but dictating what haircuts men have is crossing a line.

Situationship?

Is your adult daughter telling you about these chats? I'd zone out in seconds, just say that's nice darling.

Man has haircut.

But it doesn’t matter what their preferences are, if they don’t like buzz cuts they have the option of not getting a buzz cut themselves, they rightly have no say over what anyone else does with their hair.

I also dislike buzz cuts, my husband has blonde hair, he grows it out and then every two years or so buzzes it. It doesn’t matter that I don’t like it as it isn’t my hair.

Perhaps he feels she is controlling?

perhaps he had already planned a haircut and barely registered the conversation ? I mean not many men pay attention to hair cut conversations

Bloody hell, I'm trying to imagine any mother being THIS invested in her adult daughter's minor boy dramas. Have you not got anything better to think about?

Maybe he just liked the idea or maybe he wanted to indicate to them that he actually doesn't care what they think of his hair.

I think either: he doesn't like your dd for anything more than sex, and was making a point

Or: he wants to let her know he's not to be manipulated before he starts up a relationship.

🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

I think that it isnt a big deal though and he is not narcissistic omg.

I think stay out of it and keep on being nice to the young man

Some males often do try to put down things women like

But they don't like them, make it make sense.

I have a friend who had gorgeous, glossy, naturally curly hair. Her boyfriend told her if she ever cut her hair he’d leave her.

So she cut her hair. Got a buzz cut. Looked fabulous (wonderful cheekbones).

He left her.

Do you think my friend was a narcissist OP?

If a group of men sat around you talking about how they don’t like women wearing trousers, would you be tempted to proudly wear (and rock) trousers next time you saw them?

I expect he’s tired of their judgement

What the fucks it got to do with you?

absolutely weird take tbh.

He doesn't owe her pretty hair.

@TittyGajillions exactly. He heard them say they don’t like them and he thought “ok I’ll get a buzz cut”

My daughter is not controlling she hasn’t even mentioned it. I heard them talking Wednesday whilst washing up and then noticed it yesterday.

Summer is coming.

Maybe he just wants his hair short for warm weather. Maybe buzz cuts are stylish in his friends group. Maybe he just doesn't want to mess with it for a while.

I don't think that getting a cut is indicative of narcissism though. That seems like a reach.

Narcissistic? Mysoginist? Don’t talk rubbish.

But they aren’t even together?? I’m gobsmacked that you’ve posted this on mumsnet 😂

Why can't someone get any haircut they want, any time they want?

Why do you even care?