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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To end 1 month relationship over this tiny thing

387 replies

bicyclecrash · 19/12/2025 17:07

or am I being dramatic?

Please be honest if im overreacting. Me and my boyfriend have been together officially for 6 weeks, it's going really well. Yesterday we went out for dinner and I drove us back to mine after. On the way back, he rolled down the window and threw his empty drink can out of my car. As soon as he rolled down the window i knew that was what he was going to and asked / begged him not to as I'm the one who's car it is and I don't want someone posting my car all over the local facebook group saying rubbish is being thrown out of it.

Also it gave me the ick. I find it a bit grim that he couldn't wait 10 mins till we got to my house to throw his rubbish away.

OP posts:
ScreamingBeans · 19/12/2025 18:05

He's a savage. Dump him.

Lifelover16 · 19/12/2025 18:06

In the bin with him along with his can.
ignorant pig for doing it and ignoring your request not to.

ResusciAnnie · 19/12/2025 18:06

YANBU that’s grotty behaviour.

Pedallleur · 19/12/2025 18:07

Won't be the first time. Maybe one of those who dumps his car litter/takeaway packing on the street or car park. Get rid of him now. He won't improve

lordmadresfield · 19/12/2025 18:07

Absolutely despise littering.

Tpu · 19/12/2025 18:07

bicyclecrash · 19/12/2025 17:14

What gets me is that he didn't even need to throw the rubbish immediately. It seemed like he just done it for the thrill of it. No morals

It was partially for the thrill, but it was also a test to see if you accept him doing something shitty - especially when it is done so brazenly,. Next time he will do something shittier, and make you complicit.

Definitely dump him.

spiderlight · 19/12/2025 18:08

That would be the end of it for me, no question.

Periperi2025 · 19/12/2025 18:08

I voted YANBU before even reading you post, as you can dump someone you've been dating for a matter of weeks for ANY reason you want.

But you are definetly not BU to get the ick over that.

Magicpaintbrush · 19/12/2025 18:08

Omfg. I would dump him with immediate effect for doing that. Fucking pig. Disgusting.

dentalflosser · 19/12/2025 18:09

I regularly go out litter picking with my young DC as there is a local group. It’s arseholes like your boyfriend OP that really piss us off.
The amount of drink cans, McDonalds rubbish and crisp packets we collect is ridiculous. I’ve taught both my kids about putting rubbish in bins.
Red flag from me, imagine having a child with him and him teaching the child bad habits like this!

ElectoralControversy · 19/12/2025 18:09

I shouldn't laugh, but if you'd posted some red flags for abuse/misogyny there would be people saying maybe give him another chance, he didn't mean it, he was awkward etc

Chucked a coke can out the car? Fuck that noise, 100% say get rid 🤣

TaffetaPhrases · 19/12/2025 18:11

Complete red flag.

Rosscameasdoody · 19/12/2025 18:14

Bin. It’s a preview of things to come.

BauhausOfEliott · 19/12/2025 18:15

Oh, I would TOTALLY dump someone over this. It's completely cuntish and says SO much about him as a person. Littering is the absolute hallmark of a selfish prick.

IAmNotSureAboutYouNow · 19/12/2025 18:15

Selfish, lacks respect. Get rid.

Tabitha005 · 19/12/2025 18:16

Gah! I’d definitely get shot of the fucker, sharpish.

mellicauli · 19/12/2025 18:16

It shows a disregard for his fellow human beings who have to put up with his rubbish and eventually pick up his rubbish after him. Which will probably be you day after day if this becomes a long term thing.

And he didn't even stop and ask why when you asked him. He's 6 weeks in and he doesn't care about your opinion of him. Imagine what that will be like after 6 years.

CelestialGazer · 19/12/2025 18:17

Phonicshaskilledmeoff · 19/12/2025 17:10

Yep - put him in the bin

🤮🤮🤮

The bin’s too good for him given he doesn’t believe in using them. Drive him to the point where he threw the can out, tell him to get out of the car , explain why and tell him it’s over.

loganrock · 19/12/2025 18:18

He’s done you a huge favour. He’s shown you the sort of person he is early on. As in, ghastly.

IAmNotSureAboutYouNow · 19/12/2025 18:21

Oh and it’s not a tiny thing. Says a lot about someone.

There was this mum who always turned up late for school pick up and parked on the double yellows directly opposite school, potentially putting kids crossing the road in danger.

I saw this a few times and decided she wasn’t the kind I wanted to make friends with, selfish, entitled. Interestingly she’s actually quite popular among some of the mums, but I find these behaviours quite telling.

ScreamingBeans · 19/12/2025 18:23

NebulousSadTimes · 19/12/2025 17:18

He's testing you @bicyclecrash . Listen to your doubts.

100%. It's only been 6 weeks and already he's itching to escape from the lovey dovey persona he adopted to attract you in the first place. This is one of those things that in his social circles might be written off as trivial, which is why he's chosen it. Next time it'll be something bigger, but you'll have invested more time and emotion in him so it will be harder to dump him. The time after it will be bigger still and eventually he'll be able to treat you like s* all the time because he'll have worn you down.

Run for the hills.

AngryBird6122 · 19/12/2025 18:23

CharlieEffie · 19/12/2025 17:16

Bad enough he did it but after specifically asked him not to??? Boy bye 👋

This

FreeTheOakTree · 19/12/2025 18:25

Ugh. He would be blocked by the time I reached home.

I really struggle to imagine the type of person that would do this. Littering is so mindless, yet says a lot about a person.

End it OP and don't look back. Fact you asked him not to do it really highlights what sort or man he is.

AngryBird6122 · 19/12/2025 18:25

IAmNotSureAboutYouNow · 19/12/2025 18:21

Oh and it’s not a tiny thing. Says a lot about someone.

There was this mum who always turned up late for school pick up and parked on the double yellows directly opposite school, potentially putting kids crossing the road in danger.

I saw this a few times and decided she wasn’t the kind I wanted to make friends with, selfish, entitled. Interestingly she’s actually quite popular among some of the mums, but I find these behaviours quite telling.

Yeah I agree it's not a tiny thing because it tells you a whole lot about his character

AngryBird6122 · 19/12/2025 18:26

@bicyclecrash what happened after, when you got back to yours? Did you say anything about it?