Is this rude if you were a guest?

[Britishsummertime22]

If you were a guest in someone's house and they went up to bed without saying goodnight or telling you they were going to bed/not coming back downstairs would you think that was rude?

Nothing!

I don’t understand. You were all sitting together and they, one by one, just got up and silently left?

Clearly they go to bed earlier, was there no hints given re their bedtime / being tired / suggesting you are tired after your journey etc.

I might but it's taken me hours to get here, I've taken time off work, organised childcare and pet care....

Did they show you your room and get you settled in when you arrived (putting your bags in the room, making sure you know where the loo is, etc.)? If so I think you can go to sleep with a good conscience and see how things look in the morning.

Yes!

How long ago was it?

How are you sure they're not coming back down?

Probably about an hour ago. Yes it's very clear they have gone to bed.

Like your username BTW! Love frogs

That’s very odd. Even if they hadn’t gone to bed, that would be strange.

Are these friends? Relatives? Your parents? Are they usually a bit strange?

My autistic teen and my not mine but lives with us autistic teen would both do this so I probably wouldn't think anything of it!

Very strange not to mention rude, find somewhere else to stay from tomorrow.

Who are the people you are staying with? Do you know them well?

They are not autistic

I'd just go up to bed as well. Just say in the morning you hoped you hadn't kept them up last night? They probably just felt awkward in case you'd think they meant you had to go to your room too.

I'm just wondering whether I should say something tomorrow

This is so rude. I would get the impression that they didn’t want me there or they were just so tired. Probably the former.

Are they horribly pissed?

If you had done something to offend them they would have told you to leave.

I would probably be going home tomorrow.

How do you know them? How did you come to be staying for 3 nights-did they invite you?

Very bizarre. Have you stayed before? Were you chatting before they went off? Or on your phone? (just wondering if they took offence if you were..). I can’t imagine just walking off without saying goodnight and making sure you had everything you needed.

I agree that that's super weird, enough that I might mention it the next day--as in " let me know tonight when you're off to bed, I wondered for an awkward while last night before realising"! (Then I opened a pricy bottle of your wine 😁)

That is not normal behaviour! Which one of the two are you particularly friends with, the 1st to disappear or the second?

Yes , you need to ask them why they left you downstairs without saying good night , it’s very rude . Actually, it is the height of bad manners.

It’s really rude. I would be going to bed now, then getting up early and going home. Leave a note saying you do t know what you did, but as they were so rude as to disappear like they did you are assuming they don’t want you to stay

then stop having any contact