Is this rude if you were a guest?

[Britishsummertime22]

If you were a guest in someone's house and they went up to bed without saying goodnight or telling you they were going to bed/not coming back downstairs would you think that was rude?

How on earth is it not rude?

Yep they'd had an argument. And they are my friends for people asking who they are.

@Britishsummertime22 - hope you've had a nice time today, and they don't fall out tonight. How weird of them not to at least come down and say good night.

Ignore the midnight posters last night, OP - load of nasties x

Ok next question - how did you not notice them having an argument in front of you?!

Did they apologise for their behaviour?

Probably one of them left, the other followed and the argument happened then, resulting in them not returning.

Still rude and I hope they apologised.

I doubt they had the argumentin front of her, otherwise I'm sure op would have mentioned it.

I think I’d go home early, make sure you let them know though. Tomorrow morning sounds a good idea xxx

After the way they disappeared last night without letting op know they’d gone to bed, I’d be just inclined to disappear home without letting them know too lol

OMG - why on earth did you do that? A simple 'good night - thanks for supper!' or similar is surely the minimum. I'd also say 'Can I help with anything before I go?'

And who are the 7% who think this is OK? Wow...

@CoffeeCantata What has the OP done wrong? She's the guest who was left abruptly on her tod whilst her hosts wordlessly buggered off to bed.

It's quite odd behaviour - even if you were keeping them up. I would have said something like: "Well I'm off to bed now as need my beauty sleep. Help yourself to anything you want".

What? Have you misread the OP?

So, you would walk off, without saying a word and leave your guest sitting there on your sofa?

Oh good, not just me thats confused by that post.

Extremely rude, unless you had a good excuse. All you need to say is 'good night, had a lovely day but a bit tired now'.

Well, as a guest you don't necessarily know what time people go to bed, or what tasks need doing before bed and when. So one difference is that if someone says goodnight, you know not to expect them downstairs again and so you can decide to get your book and read on the sofa, or put a film on, or go to bed yourself.
If someone doesn't make clear that they're going to bed, they leave you hanging.

How long had you been there ?

I've only been here a few hours, I'm here for another 3 nights!!

^^ Posted last night by the OP.

Easier than having a long discussion on why they went to bed without saying anything. Just say you have to leave and go.

I think it’s rude, one probably went up with the bod on about something and you likely didn’t notice so the other followed and a disagreement ensued and then it’s awkward to come back down and say night. I do wonder what time it was and how long you had all been sat around etc. I don’t know why but I really hate it when my Mum stays up later than me when she’s our guest, it just feels weird, I try and stay up later than her but she cracks the wine open and it’s still sat there at midnight so I have to go to bed but I like to ‘close my own house down’ for the night 😂 it’s weird I know.

This happened to me many years ago. The host went to take toddler to bed and fell asleep too.

Yep that's exactly what happened

Nope! But decided to just let sleeping dogs lie. Thought it might be more trouble than it was worth. Once one of them told me they'd had an argument I just thought fine, whatever. they clearly hadn't wanted to argue in front of me. Now that I think over it, I hadnt thought much of it but one of them went upstairs in what you could think was a bit of a sulky way, I didn't think much of it as she can be a bit moody/sulky sometimes and I thought maybe she's a bit tired and the other followed and then I found out this morning they had rowed (sp?) so there we go.

Do you think maybe you might open your eyes and your mind to that some families don't have completely traditional and nuclear family arrangements? Possibly I look after my neice on set dates therefore someone needed to cover for me this weekend? You don't know anything about my family!! And why do you care??