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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Lasts too long in bed, get rid?

423 replies

jipor · 16/12/2024 12:22

Been on a few of dates with a colleague. Not had sex yet, was internally planning on it.

When discussing sex a few days ago, he sort of pre warned me that he lasts notoriously long. Usually not far off an hour.

I know, men say this to show off. But he said it knowing that I was soon going to find out. Plus, it was prompted by me saying that sex over an hour is too long for me.

AIBU or is that a ridiculous amount of time? I don't want to be having sex for that long?! I feel like cutting it off already, before having to endure that.

OP posts:
RobW1 · 21/12/2024 19:15

Only an hour?
Didn't Sting reveal a few years ago that he had regular 7 hour Tantric Sex sessions with his wife Trudie Styler?

SparklyLeader · 21/12/2024 19:24

Does he finish? Has he been tested for diabetes? Taking certain medications? Here's what the Mayo Clinic has to say about it: www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/delayed-ejaculation/symptoms-causes/syc-20371358#:~:text=Some%20medicines%2C%20certain%20ongoing%20health,of%20physical%20and%20psychological%20concerns.

JohnFrancis · 21/12/2024 19:56

StarrySquawk · 16/12/2024 13:22

That would bore the shit out of me.

Too much wanking?

Ha, ha , ha, too much wanking? Lmao, why don't say what you're really thinking! LolI, i've learned a lot listening to you women talk, I thought women took at least 15 minutes to get off, 5 minutes after foreplay, suits me! 😆

JohnFrancis · 21/12/2024 20:09

lingalingalong · 16/12/2024 13:40

Thanks for asking this question, I had been wondering if I often "rush" mine to complete😅

20mins is ideal and 30mins max for me. I actually get quite annoyed when it takes longer than that... I also sometimes wonder if he's holding it in too much at the start that he can't finish at the end; and because of that I have suggested he can come first and use his fingers on me later!

Is that normal / reasonable?

I think that's very reasonable, whatever works.

Owly11 · 21/12/2024 21:45

So he is already telling you how sex is going to be? Do you even exist other than as a hole for him to put his dick in. Urgh he sounds absolutely gross. Sex is supposed to be a mutually created and enjoyable experience and way of relating. Time to extricate yourself from this situation whether you want intercourse for an hour or not.

Freshwaterlilly · 21/12/2024 22:02

It’s quite entertaining and enlightening reading all the replies on this
I had a relationship where he just couldn’t come not once in a fairly long term relationship the sex was boring, along with an overbearing adult daughter who was of the option that he should not be in a relationship as it was too soon after he became a widower which you got to laugh was over 12 years ago more like she wanted all his money when he dies.
I was one of three women over the years she got rid off
I believe that psychological abuse by the daughter affected him which is sad for him
sex is not everything in a relationship if other things are not right then it becomes a dealbreaker at least you were pre warned why he takes so long is really what you want to know!

Jenkibubble · 22/12/2024 09:19

buttonousmaximous · 16/12/2024 12:45

I'm so glad it's not just me!! Sometimes if dh has a drink it can take him around a hour and I give up inthe end. It literally burns by that point.

Ditto - an ex used to pummel away for ages and I’d get regular bouts of cystitis !!!!!!

JohnFrancis · 22/12/2024 10:41

Schofip75 · 21/12/2024 18:15

I was wondering what he does for the last 57 mins😂

Lmfao, you're a cruel woman! 🤣

JohnFrancis · 22/12/2024 10:48

GiddyRobin · 18/12/2024 09:55

Hahaha! I think a lot of men can be a bit squeamish about it to be fair! 😂 On the one hand, I don't blame them because I don't want anything near my bum either! But if I had a whole world of pleasure up there I'd have to think twice!! This is the weirdest post I've ever made on MN. 🤣

As a guy (Squeamish) oh, ffs, 🤣 no kidding! I really do love listening to women talking about sex, it's the best, thank you.

Schofip75 · 22/12/2024 10:54

I am a man😂. I it takes longer than 3 minutes either she is ugly or not enough fore play.

JohnFrancis · 22/12/2024 11:09

Cannotorwillnot · 17/12/2024 20:31

When you say "cutting it off"…

I know, I know. I was gonna ask the same. I didn't reply, I assumed she didn't mean that, or did she? Lmao!!! 🤣

swimsong · 22/12/2024 11:25

Schofip75 · 22/12/2024 10:54

I am a man😂. I it takes longer than 3 minutes either she is ugly or not enough fore play.

Read the room, mate.

Allog · 22/12/2024 14:54

What’s all this foreplay I’m reading about?

NPET · 22/12/2024 16:32

"I feel like cutting it off already"?

Oh, the relationship.

valentinka31 · 22/12/2024 18:09

SatansBobbleheadedDashboardOrnament · 17/12/2024 20:49

If he's lasting longer than 14.5 minutes I want none of it. I don't want to risk my fanny looking like a cherry tomato.

? In my humble opinion, pussies are for fxxking. ..
I mean, mine loves it. With the one person I love. But then when I am with him, absolutely love as much as possible. I don't count how long.

valentinka31 · 22/12/2024 18:10

JohnFrancis · 21/12/2024 19:56

Ha, ha , ha, too much wanking? Lmao, why don't say what you're really thinking! LolI, i've learned a lot listening to you women talk, I thought women took at least 15 minutes to get off, 5 minutes after foreplay, suits me! 😆

with the person, I would be under 1 minute.

valentinka31 · 22/12/2024 18:11

Schofip75 · 22/12/2024 10:54

I am a man😂. I it takes longer than 3 minutes either she is ugly or not enough fore play.

This.
It is so true.
Nature is quick, a lion or T Rex might be coming, best to pass the genes on asap.. 😍

valentinka31 · 22/12/2024 18:15

JohnFrancis · 22/12/2024 11:09

I know, I know. I was gonna ask the same. I didn't reply, I assumed she didn't mean that, or did she? Lmao!!! 🤣

I don't really want to be put in the same category as this type of female, please! If she is a woman then I would say I am just me.

Cut. 'it'. off. ???

What if a guy came on here and said omg this woman says she takes ages to ... so I'm thinking to ... ? Sorry but it is insanely wrong to say that. Joke or no joke.

I am super respectful of the other person. Like, very respectful. As respectfulf as I expect from the other person. ... I can't believe anyone would actually say that out loud online. Am I very naive?

valentinka31 · 22/12/2024 18:16

sorry, this has activated me in my defense of the dxxk : ) really

TriesNotToBeCynical · 22/12/2024 18:47

I really do love listening to women talking about sex, it's the best, thank you.
@JohnFrancis When (and if) you grow up you may realise that that is both rather foolish and mildly offensive on this site.

RobW1 · 22/12/2024 18:56

valentinka31 · 22/12/2024 18:09

? In my humble opinion, pussies are for fxxking. ..
I mean, mine loves it. With the one person I love. But then when I am with him, absolutely love as much as possible. I don't count how long.

Inches or duration?

christmascracker123 · 22/12/2024 19:44

DH is like this, he is an utterly marvellous man and I love everything about him but my god it puts me off, I get so bored. I would be up for it so much more regularly if it was just a quickie. But he is amazing in every other way so not sure what I can do about it really.

JohnFrancis · 22/12/2024 19:52

Laureolaaa · 16/12/2024 12:34

No way, dump.

Ha, ha ,ha, dump! What would I be tempted to say? Get the fcuk off me!

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