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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Neighbours Indiana Jones-ing their way into our garden

1000 replies

Dadfromthesea · 25/09/2023 15:33

This is making me seethe and chuckle in equal measure.

At the end of our garden are some big old fir trees, then the boundary fence. After that there’s a little stream, and if you kept going you’d find the fence of the people who live in the house behind (let’s call them Mr and Mrs Jones), then their back garden.

The Joneseseses have just bought a big seating unit thing and plonked it at the back end of their garden (the bit nearest us). It’s about 10ft from my boundary fence and a good 70ft from the back of my house - we’re lucky to have a big garden - and there’s the fir trees as well which make it a pretty thick barrier.

But they decided they want some privacy and put up a big canvass barrier. Fair enough, I don’t care.

Except…

They’ve tied it to our fir trees!

They’ve clambered over their own fence, slung a ladder (an actual LADDER) over the stream, scrambled up the bank, and cable tied the bloody thing to our trees! Without so much as a word!

They did it in the dead of night! Came down the other day to discover the bloody Shroud of Turin cable tied to my trees! The ladder was still there on the bank of the stream.

So obviously, being British and terrified of confrontation, I did the natural thing of not mentioning it to them but instead cutting the fucker down. It’s now in my garage.

And they’ve replaced it with another!! It arrived overnight this morning!

Just to be clear - I don’t care that they want to shield themselves from us. It’s a dark green thing so I can barely even see it. But I can see it, and I do care that they’ve gone on a bloody Navy SEAL Commando mission, twice, to my garden to put the bloody thing up!

Yes I could go and talk to them but a) I’ve never said a word to them before b) they might kill me and c) this is funnier.

But tell me I ANBU please.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
37
TheBeef · 25/09/2023 21:20

I don't understand why they are doing it? They want to look at the stream but not your house or garden?

Cheeky to come onto your garden or tie stuff to your trees.

Looking forward to Shroud III

MonumentalLentil · 25/09/2023 21:20

This reply has been deleted

The OP has privacy concerns and so we've agreed to take this down.

A big crocodile or alligator and a sign that says 'Trespassers will be Eaten' maybe.

Fuckitydoodah · 25/09/2023 21:22

And the award for the best ever hand drawn diagram drawn by an OP goes to............

Can't wait for the next instalment. Surely they won't risk a shroud version 3.

cuddlebear · 25/09/2023 21:22

Or Trespassers Will Be Electrocuted

That might work…

wineandmaltesershappyme · 25/09/2023 21:24

This thread is hilarious 🤣

drinkuptheezider · 25/09/2023 21:25

cuddlebear · 25/09/2023 21:22

Or Trespassers Will Be Electrocuted

That might work…

or XL bully guards these premises.( gets coat)

AbbeyGailsParty · 25/09/2023 21:29

BellaTheDarkOverlord · 25/09/2023 16:14

Remove the ladder by stealth in the night and replace with a dolls house sized ladder.

Love it. Do this.

Are they trying to tell you they can see something in your garden they shouldn’t? Just seems a bit overkill to protect their garden, they could just put up one of those sails over their seating.

DaisyMaisyFaisy · 25/09/2023 21:31

This is just brilliant! Such a shame you don’t have a wildlife camera that caught them in action!

Mummumgem · 25/09/2023 21:32

This has really cheered me up, can’t wait for the next instalment

CitizenofMoronia · 25/09/2023 21:33

Vitriolinsanity · 25/09/2023 20:32

That is fucking badass @CitizenofMoronia

I need one of those bad boys.

This is him at night with his sacrifice

https://www.instagram.com/p/CBgy_HTj2Uw/?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==

Instagram

https://www.instagram.com/p/CBgy_HTj2Uw?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA%3D%3D

Gillbil · 25/09/2023 21:33

This is hilarious! Also I second the tripwire blank shotgun cartridge.....just saying😏

Poplolly · 25/09/2023 21:34

wineandmaltesershappyme · 25/09/2023 21:24

This thread is hilarious 🤣

It gets better! Looks like mrs Jones uses mumsnet too. She’s started her own thread 🤣 pissed off cos someone keeps nicking her sail

LoveRules · 25/09/2023 21:38

That's hands down the best ever diagram I've seen in all my years of mumsnet and I've seen a goodly number!

Well done for Shroud II removal and for getting the local wildlife fed and brownies kept occupied!

wineandmaltesershappyme · 25/09/2023 21:38

@Poplolly ah thank you thank you, off to find it.

Watchingthegp · 25/09/2023 21:38

Giant 🦉 love it!

ZeldaWillTellYourFortune · 25/09/2023 21:39

I'm liking the idea of large motion activated spiders dangling amid the firs.

Imagine them stealthily working on shroud III when a couple of giant hairy tarantulas start shaking and squealing??

CitizenofMoronia · 25/09/2023 21:39

Poplolly · 25/09/2023 21:34

It gets better! Looks like mrs Jones uses mumsnet too. She’s started her own thread 🤣 pissed off cos someone keeps nicking her sail

Link!?

Poplolly · 25/09/2023 21:41

Don’t know how to link sorry. It’s called something like neighbour being a cf

FictionalCharacter · 25/09/2023 21:43

@CitizenofMoronia someone linked it earlier. If you scroll up you’ll find it

wineandmaltesershappyme · 25/09/2023 21:45

Honestly crying with laughter here 😂

NigelFaragesTinyConscience · 25/09/2023 21:46

CliffsofMohair · 25/09/2023 19:59

Also NigelFaragesTinyConscience would make an excellent username

Why yes it does!

justwatchingtelly · 25/09/2023 21:46

wineandmaltesershappyme · 25/09/2023 21:45

Honestly crying with laughter here 😂

Me too!

justwatchingtelly · 25/09/2023 21:47

For those who requested link to other thread

To think my neighbour is a CF? http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/amiibeingunreasonable/4905627-to-think-my-neighbour-is-a-cf

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