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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Neighbours Indiana Jones-ing their way into our garden

1000 replies

Dadfromthesea · 25/09/2023 15:33

This is making me seethe and chuckle in equal measure.

At the end of our garden are some big old fir trees, then the boundary fence. After that there’s a little stream, and if you kept going you’d find the fence of the people who live in the house behind (let’s call them Mr and Mrs Jones), then their back garden.

The Joneseseses have just bought a big seating unit thing and plonked it at the back end of their garden (the bit nearest us). It’s about 10ft from my boundary fence and a good 70ft from the back of my house - we’re lucky to have a big garden - and there’s the fir trees as well which make it a pretty thick barrier.

But they decided they want some privacy and put up a big canvass barrier. Fair enough, I don’t care.

Except…

They’ve tied it to our fir trees!

They’ve clambered over their own fence, slung a ladder (an actual LADDER) over the stream, scrambled up the bank, and cable tied the bloody thing to our trees! Without so much as a word!

They did it in the dead of night! Came down the other day to discover the bloody Shroud of Turin cable tied to my trees! The ladder was still there on the bank of the stream.

So obviously, being British and terrified of confrontation, I did the natural thing of not mentioning it to them but instead cutting the fucker down. It’s now in my garage.

And they’ve replaced it with another!! It arrived overnight this morning!

Just to be clear - I don’t care that they want to shield themselves from us. It’s a dark green thing so I can barely even see it. But I can see it, and I do care that they’ve gone on a bloody Navy SEAL Commando mission, twice, to my garden to put the bloody thing up!

Yes I could go and talk to them but a) I’ve never said a word to them before b) they might kill me and c) this is funnier.

But tell me I ANBU please.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
37
ProvisionsOnTheDock · 25/09/2023 15:35

How big is your garage? Just keep cutting the canopies down and see how long it takes them to come round and have a word.

It's probably shelter they want rather than privacy to be fair.

Certainlyreally · 25/09/2023 15:36

cut it down again

then have a Garage Sale (or sail)

BeastOfBODMAS · 25/09/2023 15:37

YANBU.

can you grease the middle rungs of the ladder?

Elfandwellbeing · 25/09/2023 15:37

Sorry no help I laughed I’m afraid at the lunacy of waiting until dark. Cut it down again please send a photo also.

OlizraWiteomQua · 25/09/2023 15:37

Cut the replacement down too.

Zipwire a notice to your tree saying this is private property and nothing can be erected on your land or attached to your trees without your permission.

Give your phone number and a helpful diagram to show where the boundary is.

Make sure no branches of your trees overhang their boundary. Get a tree surgeon in to ensure this if needed.

Theunamedcat · 25/09/2023 15:37

Anti vandal paint the tree?

8008less · 25/09/2023 15:40

Did they climb over your fence??

Shinyandnew1 · 25/09/2023 15:42

How cheeky! Are you going to cut this one down as well??

Tinkerbyebye · 25/09/2023 15:43

Just take it down again. And keep taking it down and if they leave the ladder take that as well

Throwncrumbs · 25/09/2023 15:44

Entitled neighbours everywhere!

BillStickersWillBeProsocuted · 25/09/2023 15:46

Yeah cut it down and leave a note!

From your description it sounds like the stream is in an area not owned by anyone (or ownd by the council I assume?) If that's the case maybe they think these trees are part of the no mans land? Although you did also mention there's a fence so I might be being over generous!

Either way I reckon keep cutting them down! Altough I'm not sure if you should be leaving them there - I think if you take them it could techincally constitue theft? Although it's not theft if you can prove you intened to give them back!

BlimeyO · 25/09/2023 15:48

I think we’re going to need a diagram…

Xiaoxiong · 25/09/2023 15:48

YABU and I know that you know it, so I'm sure you're going to go round and do the neighbourly thing and knock and explain that the trees belong to you, nothing should be fastened to them but if they want a canopy you've found this one online that is freestanding <helpful>. And here's the one you removed from the tree before it was damaged and please can the current one be removed too.

The last thing you want to do is get sucked into a land war in Asia tree war in your back garden, even if they started it!

Totalwasteofpaper · 25/09/2023 15:48

I would 100% keep cutting it down and saying nothing 😁

I had a similar but different problem with a house association leaving keys for our main entrance in a non secure location.
I asked them not to leave them there as it wasn't secure and I was the only neighbour out of 4 who hadn't yet been robbed (as I had a London bar)
The HA ignored me so I would take the keys. Every time.

When I moved out I left 22 front door keys for the new owner 😂

thiswasabadone · 25/09/2023 15:49

You need to get your own canvas and put it up. Something obnoxious, just for a few weeks

FOJN · 25/09/2023 15:51

Xiaoxiong · 25/09/2023 15:48

YABU and I know that you know it, so I'm sure you're going to go round and do the neighbourly thing and knock and explain that the trees belong to you, nothing should be fastened to them but if they want a canopy you've found this one online that is freestanding <helpful>. And here's the one you removed from the tree before it was damaged and please can the current one be removed too.

The last thing you want to do is get sucked into a land war in Asia tree war in your back garden, even if they started it!

Obviously this is the mature response but it's not nearly as funny as the OP's solution.

Dadfromthesea · 25/09/2023 15:52

I once got a tea towel with my DD’s face on it when she was a baby. It seemed like a good idea but it was actually the most horrific image ever committed to canvas. But it does give me the idea of getting a gigantic canvas sheet with all of our faces on it, and installing it facing their back garden.

OP posts:
Pootles34 · 25/09/2023 15:53

Move the ladder so that it's on your side of the stream. Get a wildlife camera so you can watch them Indiana Jones'ing it back.

myBumJuiceSmellsLikeRoses · 25/09/2023 15:55

Dadfromthesea · 25/09/2023 15:52

I once got a tea towel with my DD’s face on it when she was a baby. It seemed like a good idea but it was actually the most horrific image ever committed to canvas. But it does give me the idea of getting a gigantic canvas sheet with all of our faces on it, and installing it facing their back garden.

With the words "Get off my land!" in capitals underneath?

UselessGardener · 25/09/2023 15:55

Keep cutting down. Say nothing. Deck yourself out in camo gear and sneak out in the middle of the night to cut it down each time.

I'd also get someone to film me and make it into a montage.

Mature? No.
Funny? Yes.

Teddleshon · 25/09/2023 15:56

This is interesting, we have fields that face the village High Street and people are perpetually attaching things along our fence, everything from advertising local events (both profit making and charity) to birthday wishes! Drives me absolutely mad that nobody has ever asked if it’s ok and I wonder how they would feel if I started randomly attaching stuff to their front fence.

I wish I had the guts to cut it down so good for you OP!

TheMurderousGoose · 25/09/2023 15:57

I'd keep cutting it down whilst maintaining a cordial 'cooeee, Roy and Sheila' relationship when I saw them on the street.

apostrophewoman · 25/09/2023 15:58

Dadfromthesea · 25/09/2023 15:52

I once got a tea towel with my DD’s face on it when she was a baby. It seemed like a good idea but it was actually the most horrific image ever committed to canvas. But it does give me the idea of getting a gigantic canvas sheet with all of our faces on it, and installing it facing their back garden.

Please. Please do this. Please.

Dadfromthesea · 25/09/2023 15:59

I have also toyed with the idea of knocking on, coquettishly leaning against their front door, and seductively whispering ‘Your shroud is tied to my fir tree’ to Mr Jones.

OP posts:
ApolloandDaphne · 25/09/2023 16:02

Take this one down and replace it with a ransom note. £3000 in old notes by Wednesday at 3.45 am or else the tarps get it.

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