To call my neighbour selfish

[Fedupandgrumpy1]

We live in a quiet street with about 10 houses in. I have mobility issues and also struggle with my MH. It's important for me to have as much sleep as possible so I tend to go to bed at 10.30pm and don't get up until about 11am.

Very recently a family moved in next door. They have 3 children who are lovely and not a problem. But their mother annoys me and I feel she is being selfish. She works strange hours and most days leaves the house to go to work at 4.30am. She drives an old car and the doors creaks when she opens it. She then normally sits in the car with it running for 5 mins before driving off. The father is fine.

I have spoken to her and told her about my health issues and have asked her to consider changing her working hours, replace her car or to park her car in a road away from the house. She said she was sorry that she disturbs me but she cannot change her working hours due to the nature of her job. She said they can't afford to replace the car and as its an old car she has to warm it up before going anywhere. She admits the door creaks and said that oiling is didn't help. She is not willing to park away from home and she doesn't think its safe to walk on her own early in the morning with no streetlights.

She is making me more poorly. I am now having to sleep a bit in the afternoon due go being disturbed and as a result am missing out on me time.

What can I do about it? I'm fed up of her selfish behaviour.

She works so she has spare money????!!! Whatever money she has I am pretty damn sure her priorities are spending it on what her family needs, not what a neighbour wants! She is not being selfish, OP, she is simply going to work. If it is causing you such a problem, you need to find a way to deal with it, not her.

JFC. You sleep until 11 am, so any neighbour going to work, school or the shops would annoy you. A creaking car door. I've really heard it all now. Maybe they could get rid of their car and walk down the street in carpet slippers?

Have you thought about moving to a quieter area without neighbors?

You are unreasonable to expect someone to change their job because she starts work to early for your liking which makes you tired even though you don’t get up until 11am (she’s done 6 hours of hard graft by then) and it means you have to nap in the afternoon and that eats up your ‘me time’ …wonder if the grafter gets any me time, get a job or a hobby and stop monitoring your neighbours you tricking weirdo!

Take a bow OP - this is next level YABU 🫨

Simply change your sleep to 3pm to 4am. That's only a little thing to ask of you.
You're getting half an hour more sleep so must be a wonderful option and she won't disturb you when she gets up.

I'll assume you don't work due to sleeping until noon and afternoon naps? Cheek of this woman trying to work!!

You are batshit.

No one is this self absorbed and selfish surely? What have I just read???

This is surely not a real thread? But as the parent of a teenager who is registered blind, among other disabilities, I am getting heartily sick of threads on MN that seem calculated to undermine the credibility and societal acceptance and tolerance of disabled people. Disabled people are among the most vulnerable in the country but the narrative on MN would have them as freeloading (PIP & DLA), highly advantaged (BlueBadge), depriving able-bodied parents of parking spaces in supermarkets and just generally being in the way of the alpha and able-bodied more important members of society.

Move your bedroom to the other side of your house!

It sounds like she has done her best by oiling the door - that's more than most would have done. She's getting up at 4.30 am when she has 3 kids - I doubt that's through choice, and more financial necessity.

I'd probably be apologising for being so unreasonable and blame the lack of sleep or something.

Edited to add - if she parked away from the house she probably wouldn't be covered by her insurance if anything were to happen such as it being stolen or run into when parked.

noooooooooooooo

i cannot believe someone is THAT entitled to ask someone to CHANGE JOBS!!!!! because it god forbids disturbs her peace

so you move then? Ear plugs? Headphones?

there’s a whole host of options rather than asking her to change her job. I’ve heard it all now

reading my husband this and he’s in hysterics

I say as someone who gets incredibly sick without my sleep. I’ve been hospitalised before for it! Many times. I Ben I would dare to ask someone this

Did it ever occur to you that any "spare money" your neighbour has gets spent on things for her children? You're being unreasonable, selfish and horrifically entitled.

Are you for real.....someone getting up at 4am to go to work and earn a living for there family. Respect to them.

This has to be a reverse. (Unless you're my neighbour who wanted me to put my washing machine on the garage 🤨)

I second white noise. I'm a poor sleeper and easily disturbed but one hot summer I had a fan on in the bedroom and I discovered I didn't notice anything else. The downside is I can't sleep without a fan running but generally it is well worth it.

@Fedupandgrumpy1 wow, you asked a hard working woman to change her hours, buy a car, park streets away when she has to leave at 4.30am so you can have some ‘me time’? How much sleep / me time do you think she gets when she’s probably up at 4am? You are so lucky she didn’t tell you to fuck off.
Seeing as you think money is so easy to come by why don’t you buy a house in the middle of nowhere?

Please tell me you didn’t ask. Like really. You didn’t do that?

Just when you think you’ve read it all on MN 😂

“she works so must have some spare money” - she has three kids, a car that creaks and goes to work at 4.30. I can promise you this isn’t because she’s living the life of Riley.

if this is real, this level of batshittery needs a place in Classics

Ear plugs and white noise.

Besides maybe asking her to oil her car door, you are being completely unreasonable.

You are off the chart as a cf.

I suggest you move, or buy her a newer car, or pay her the same salary she gets at her current job.

I am sorry you are ill but the world does not revolve around you. Stop being so entitled and selfish. You may need her help some timem

Spend your own money on triple glazed windows and soundproofing or stick cotton wool in your tabs. The engine is running for five minutes, shes not sat revving the arse out of it

What exactly are you missing out on when you nap in the day?

Batshit. I have to leave for work at 4.30 when on earlies and yes I have to run the car for a few minutes in order to clear the inside of the windscreen. Cos I like to actually be able to see where I'm going. I'd also rather not be woken by a 3.45 alarm and out the door on freezing mornings in the pitch black but needs must, bills don't pay themselves. Get over yourself