To think my friend is treating me like her maid

[Grabhands]

For context, this is a friend who I have known for years, haven't seen since before COVID. We booked and are on a 7 day all in beach holiday in the Med.

Meals are buffet service, tea service and cakes etc at certain times from a pool bar and a bar where you can go and get alcoholic drinks etc. At meal times waiters will bring you water for the table and you go to bar for anything else. Bar a few mins walk.

At every single meal we have had since arriving, she tries to send me to the bar to get her a drink, if I am going anyway absolutely fine, otherwise get your own!

She also keeps taking food from my plate to try it, with fingers , and then says can you go and get me some of that.

When I get desert, she gives me a list and asks me to bring back plates of various things.

Tea, she doesn't want to go to bar to get cakes, in case she misses some sun so again even though I don't want anything asks me to go.

I know its petty, and I'm usually easy going but after 3 days I have just said you go, you have legs too, and please stop taking food from my plate.

She is now very offended and huffing and puffing!

Am I being a cow?

No. I'd be moving my plate away from her grabby hands and asking what her issue is.

Thank you!.

We were half way through lunch today and she suddenly said can you get me another coke from the bar. That for me was the tipping point!. I wasn't going to the bar I was eating my lunch and quite happy with water.

Good for you on calling her out on it and keep doing so, a quick “pretty sure I went for the last drinks so can you get me a pina colada this time please” on repeat should do the trick!

Just say no, your turn. It doesn’t need to be a big fall out.

I would be asking her ‘why? Is there something wrong with your legs?’

When she asks, say 'I think it's your turn, I'll have a coke too, thanks'.

I’d probably go with “Did you forget to pack your legs on this trip? Bar’s that way! I’ll take a Mojito while you’re up!”

No yanbu, perfect response @grabhands

If her fingers go anywhere near your plate quickly stab them with a fork! Should put her off.

That's so weird. I'm really intrigued why she thinks it's okay!

"I'm not your fucking slave you lazy mare" should do it.

You should have told her at the start that you're not her servant! Outrageous behaviour. She's got a bloody cheek being offended that you finally told her to get it herself. Any reasonable person would have been taking it in turns from the start.

Like a pp said ask her why? 'No, seriously...why can't you go?' See what she says.

She is just huffing because she has been called out.

No idea, first few days I let it go, as I was pleased to see her and ok.

If I say no, like now, she says something along the lines of I'm so relaxed grabhands, so need a break, can't you go.

Just weird and I really hate other people touching my food TBH, makes me a bit erugh.

YANBU. Just say no, get it yourself. Or start asking her to get stuff for you all the time.

I'm so relaxed? Wth?? Lol

If one of my friends was behaving like that I’d say “So when did you lose the use of your legs, then, you cheeky cow?” and they would probably laugh. The fact that she has the audacity to be huffy about this being mentioned is incredible!

Just say well it's my turn to relax now...mines a cocktail

I wonder if she is nervous or anxious about doing it for some reason, like those women who always make their partners go to the bar, fill up the car, order their food etc.

Say to her 'well I'm feeling relaxed too, why can't you go for me?'

She's taking the piss. Why does her need to relax supercede yours? She's showing you that she doesn't respect you, so huffing and puffing or not, she needs to get off her lazy ass and sort herself out. You've done the right thing to stand up for yourself, ignore the huffing and puffing, ask her if she's got a puncture if she keeps on blowing hot air

Good on you for putting your foot down with a firm hand. She's a lazy so and so and you were definatly right to put her in her place.

Thanks everyone, I didn't want to be petty, but I find it really odd and a bit lazy.

No, she doesn't take it in turns, I get our fresh towels every morning and put on loungers after breakfast, today I couldn't as had to do something, met her on beach and said did you get me a towel, No she says, but towel hut over there, I was like yes I know!!!!

I’d say “Oh no thank you! You go ahead.”

And let her be confused. If she says it again, say

“mmm, I don’t need anything, I’m all good! Thanks!”

Def wouldn’t get her a towel again. Hi many more days?