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Original poster

MIL has my Valentine gift

368 replies

CloudySuns · 14/02/2023 07:57

About 5 years ago, DH bought me a few gifts for valentines day including a mug, it was very distinctive being red with 'love you' on it.

I really liked this mug. It would cheer me up whenever I looked at it, it was a perfect size for my coffee, comfy handle, just a nice mug. I used it daily.

A few years ago we stayed with MIL between house moves for 4 weeks, and I took my favourite mug.

I noticed her using it a few times, fine, okay, fair enough we were staying there. But when we moved out, and I couldn't find this mug. I swear I packed it but it wasn't in the box with other mugs.

The next time we visited MIL, I noticed my mug in her cupboard. I thought oh good, I can't have packed it! I brought it out and said I'd been looking for it and phew there it was!

She said NO that's her mug. That someone bought it for her. I asked who? She couldn't remember.

This mug is very distinctive, even with a little scratch I made by accident the first week I had it, so I know it's my mug.

Of course I'd be a right knob to have argued further, so I put it back in her cupboard. It's just a mug but every valentines day I think about it and it irks me! It was my mug!

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
LittleVoice11 · 16/02/2023 22:07

StanleyBriggs · 16/02/2023 19:39

"she insists that I make the tea/coffee when we visit"

WTF peculiarer and peculiarer.

I love the idea of the stolen pig injustice being spiritually redeemed by machinations of the Sainsbury's mug. Surely this will restore the balance in the world and solve most of our problems.

The stolen pig injustice, hilarious I love it!! Meanwhile, I hope the mug goes back to its rightful owner!! :-) xx

Jillybloop393 · 17/02/2023 00:31

Ohh I want the pig to get back to its rightful owner!!
Regarding the mug .... steal it back, soon verrrry soon - and tell us how you did it, every little fact. We need to know!

Stewball01 · 17/02/2023 08:07

@FuckoffeeBeforeCoffee
I was thinking the same thing. If OP can't have it then nobody can.

T1Dmama · 17/02/2023 10:45

I bet she gets it out when her friends come over and tells them all her son got it for her

T1Dmama · 17/02/2023 10:56

harrassedmumto3 · 14/02/2023 13:44

She put you up for 4 weeks. Let it go.

She put them up so can steal whatever she likes from her own son and his wife? Are you the MIL ? 😂

Lollipopsicle · 17/02/2023 12:43

GretaGip · 14/02/2023 09:27

I'd take it and leave another mug in its place.

Ahem.

I can't possibly condone that sort of language. It's genius though.

Lollipopsicle · 17/02/2023 12:46

CloudySuns · 14/02/2023 08:41

I found it!

But bloody hell I can't spend £14 on a mug 😩I may need to move on and let this go.

Time for a GoFundMe methinks! 😉

Emotionalsupportviper · 17/02/2023 12:51

LittleVoice11 · 16/02/2023 22:04

I really hope you get it back because it’s way more important than the stolen pig, (being a special gift!) and I look forward to hearing if you do!! :-) xx

NEVER underestimate the moral significance of a stolen pig.

TangledWebOfDeception · 17/02/2023 13:29

LittleVoice11 · 16/02/2023 15:34

Thank you :-) it was only a little pig but it meant a lot and it kind of had implications on the friendship too, as you don’t forget weird behaviour like that easily. Bit like the OP… that relationship is now clouded, and all over a mug, but she knows she is right.

We never spoke about it again but did drift apart afterwards and might not have, had that event not taken place. So over the grand course of things behaviour like that will get you nowhere. And I bet I wasn’t the only one to be on the receiving end of an outburst! Xx

Show quote history

The only plausible excuse for her insistence that it was hers would be that she and you were both given identical little pigs as a farewell gift from your colleagues, unbeknownst to each of you. She managed to misplace hers whilst you packed/unpacked yours safely (which you and friend #2 knew was the case, but she wouldn’t have), so when she saw it she did actually think it was her pig and thought you had stolen it/were lying!

Doesn’t necessarily excuse the full-on batshittery, mind.

Original poster
CloudySuns · 17/02/2023 15:12

I have slept on it and I'm definitely going to get the mug back. I know it's mine, it has sentimental value, and I'll buy her another mug. I'll say it's from DH. She will love that.

The thing is, I will have to forever hide it so she doesn't see it because then she'll think I've stolen it, as she has had it for absolutely ages now. But I still want it.

Also, shall I tell DH I'm getting it back or should I just get it, and not say a word? Just pop it at the back of the cupboard?

OP posts:
Silvers11 · 17/02/2023 15:16

CloudySuns · 17/02/2023 15:12

I have slept on it and I'm definitely going to get the mug back. I know it's mine, it has sentimental value, and I'll buy her another mug. I'll say it's from DH. She will love that.

The thing is, I will have to forever hide it so she doesn't see it because then she'll think I've stolen it, as she has had it for absolutely ages now. But I still want it.

Also, shall I tell DH I'm getting it back or should I just get it, and not say a word? Just pop it at the back of the cupboard?

@CloudySuns I don't know if you saw my previous post - but couldn't you buy the same one that you saw on line - then swap it over without her knowing, so that you have the one which has sentimental value to you - and she will never know?

BananaBender · 17/02/2023 15:55

Get DH to do it. Keep it all in the open. He said he’d get it back so make him do it.

Alternatively the next time you’re there slip the mug into your handbag, then when it’s time to make coffee just use MIL’s blue and white mugs. If she asks where the red one is just play dumb. Tell her there’s no red mug in there. She can check for herself and see that it’s not there.

Howabsolutelyfanfuckingtastic · 17/02/2023 16:17

Oh i'd definitely get DH to do it and show her the scratch you know yours had on it. Maybe both be there so she can't deny it and talk DH round? Either way honesty is the best policy and you don't want to have to hide it all the time!

kateandme · 17/02/2023 16:31

But she will no.it will be gone and somehow She will see it at yours or just no.who else 😏. And u can just stand there every time going nope not seen it.how odd.
And if she does see it at your again just say bobbles yes I loved my mug sooooo much you see,so I had to buy another.

kateandme · 17/02/2023 16:32

kateandme · 17/02/2023 16:31

But she will no.it will be gone and somehow She will see it at yours or just no.who else 😏. And u can just stand there every time going nope not seen it.how odd.
And if she does see it at your again just say bobbles yes I loved my mug sooooo much you see,so I had to buy another.

And she can't say anything because she did the same basically

Emotionalsupportviper · 17/02/2023 17:24

BananaBender · 17/02/2023 15:55

Get DH to do it. Keep it all in the open. He said he’d get it back so make him do it.

Alternatively the next time you’re there slip the mug into your handbag, then when it’s time to make coffee just use MIL’s blue and white mugs. If she asks where the red one is just play dumb. Tell her there’s no red mug in there. She can check for herself and see that it’s not there.

If necessary go for a pee and hide to in her cistern until you are ready to leave in case she demands to search your bag.

BananaBender · 17/02/2023 17:37

Lol! I like your thinking @Emotionalsupportviper ! Hide the mug like it’s drugs.

@CloudySuns You might need to take a ziplock bag with you so you can safely stash your coffee mug in the toilet cistern!

AllTheAll · 17/02/2023 17:57

Make a custom photo mug for her.
With a picture of you drinking out of the I love you mug.

Emotionalsupportviper · 17/02/2023 18:40

AllTheAll · 17/02/2023 17:57

Make a custom photo mug for her.
With a picture of you drinking out of the I love you mug.

I like your style!

electricmoccasins · 17/02/2023 19:07

AllTheAll · 17/02/2023 17:57

Make a custom photo mug for her.
With a picture of you drinking out of the I love you mug.

I can’t breathe… 🤣🤣🤣🤣

Original poster
CloudySuns · 17/02/2023 19:59

Silvers11 · 17/02/2023 15:16

@CloudySuns I don't know if you saw my previous post - but couldn't you buy the same one that you saw on line - then swap it over without her knowing, so that you have the one which has sentimental value to you - and she will never know?

Show quote history

I'm sorry I didn't see your post!

I mean, yes, technically, I absolutely could buy the same one and replace it. There's just an awful part of me that doesn't want to. This shameful part of me just wants my mug back, even if I need to bleach it to un-taint it.

OP posts:
Emotionalsupportviper · 17/02/2023 20:10

CloudySuns · 17/02/2023 19:59

I'm sorry I didn't see your post!

I mean, yes, technically, I absolutely could buy the same one and replace it. There's just an awful part of me that doesn't want to. This shameful part of me just wants my mug back, even if I need to bleach it to un-taint it.

Show quote history

Pn principle YOU MUST NOT GIVE HER A SIMILAR MUG!

By all means replace it with one that says "Ha Ha!'.or "We know what you did . . . ", or "Look - we love you but that was NOT your mug!" or whatever if you must replace a mug - but she has to be deprived of the mug and be impotent to do anything about it.

It's the Law of the Jungle Mumsnet.

LittleVoice11 · 17/02/2023 20:22

TangledWebOfDeception · 17/02/2023 13:29

The only plausible excuse for her insistence that it was hers would be that she and you were both given identical little pigs as a farewell gift from your colleagues, unbeknownst to each of you. She managed to misplace hers whilst you packed/unpacked yours safely (which you and friend #2 knew was the case, but she wouldn’t have), so when she saw it she did actually think it was her pig and thought you had stolen it/were lying!

Doesn’t necessarily excuse the full-on batshittery, mind.

Show quote history

Thank you, that’s a possibility I never thought of, we hadn’t seen any other similar pig in the house but it’s definitely a plausible explanation! Xx

Zimp · 17/02/2023 23:13

This would be hilarious! Love it.

OliveWah · 17/02/2023 23:32

I've only read your posts OP, so apologies if someone else has suggested this already: Next time you and DH are at MIL's, DH finds the mug and announces "Look DW! It's the mug I bought you for Valentines Day, we must have left it here when we stayed for a month! See, it's got the little scratch right here, so it's definitely the one!" She'd be really ballsy if she doesn't let you take it home then. Good luck, whichever way you go about it, but make sure you get your mug back!