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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

I’d want to do the same - mother kills children’s abuser

616 replies

HermioneKipper · 24/11/2022 08:18

www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/crime/sarah-sands-kill-sex-abuse-paedophile-b2231508.html

i think any parent would do the same if given the chance

OP posts:
Lockheart · 24/11/2022 08:23

They might, that doesn't mean it's not illegal. You don't take the law into your own hands.

mamacattiva · 24/11/2022 08:29

I heard her sons on the radio last night and they were supportive and proud of her actions, I let out a little cheer as I was driving.

Mommabear20 · 24/11/2022 08:30

Wouldn't even cross my mind! 😡

Life in prison. They don't suffer if they're dead! Only their families, and 1 family grieving is already 1 too many! Same reason I don't agree with the death penalty. I do think prison should be harder though.

shellylongbottom · 24/11/2022 08:32

Lockheart · 24/11/2022 08:23

They might, that doesn't mean it's not illegal. You don't take the law into your own hands.

So is what he did to those boys. Your point?

FuckabethFuckor · 24/11/2022 08:32

This article on the same events is interesting. There were clearly distinct downsides to her being in prison for several years, she missed some of her sons’ teenage years and they all have some level of anger towards her.

It’s a horrible and sad situation. There are no winners here. I can understand why she did what she did but I also think there were other ways to tackle it that didn’t include killing him herself. I think it is right, both legally and morally, that she was convicted and punished. And I think it’s important to acknowledge that her actions, albeit protective in nature, negatively impacted the lives of her sons.

Ivyonafence · 24/11/2022 08:33

She would have been a hero in prison

Lockheart · 24/11/2022 08:36

shellylongbottom · 24/11/2022 08:32

So is what he did to those boys. Your point?

My point is that two wrongs don't make a right, that murder is illegal, that he was already awaiting trial for his alleged crimes, and that people shouldn't take the law into their own hands. Thanks to her actions three little boys who desperately needed their mother to be around were left without her and the alleged perpetrator never faced justice on a court of law.

Lockheart · 24/11/2022 08:37

Ivyonafence · 24/11/2022 08:33

She would have been a hero in prison

But she wasn't the one who should have been there. She should have let justice take it's course, then he'd have been in jail and she'd have been around for her boys.

FuckabethFuckor · 24/11/2022 08:39

Ivyonafence · 24/11/2022 08:33

She would have been a hero in prison

This isn’t really how prison works. Spend a bit of time in one and you’ll see.

LindseyHoyleSpeaks · 24/11/2022 08:40

Fair play to her.

Moltenpink · 24/11/2022 08:41

Lockheart · 24/11/2022 08:37

But she wasn't the one who should have been there. She should have let justice take it's course, then he'd have been in jail and she'd have been around for her boys.

He’d apparently been offending for years though so justice clearly wasn’t taking its course

strugglingabitnow · 24/11/2022 08:42

I can understand why she did it. In the same position I’d want to , I’d probably think about doing it but I know I wouldn’t be able to actually do it given the chance

Mumsanetta · 24/11/2022 08:44

Lockheart · 24/11/2022 08:36

My point is that two wrongs don't make a right, that murder is illegal, that he was already awaiting trial for his alleged crimes, and that people shouldn't take the law into their own hands. Thanks to her actions three little boys who desperately needed their mother to be around were left without her and the alleged perpetrator never faced justice on a court of law.

He had faced the law in respect of 24 previous convictions spanning decades and was still a free man. Not sure that a further 3 convictions after a horrendous trial for young children would have made much of a difference in terms of justice.

bloodyplanes · 24/11/2022 08:45

I absolutely would as well op! I would happily do time for making them suffer!

Typo22 · 24/11/2022 08:46

A child very close to me (won't say what relationship is as could be outing) went through the same thing.

I watched that mum being interviewed on BBC news yesterday and cheered for her.

The sick paedophile who hurt the child I love might not even get jail time and if he does it's not likely to be for long. He deserves to rot for the rest of his miserable life behind bars and knowing there's no chance of that happening and he'll be able to do the same to other children makes me sick to my stomach.

Stressedmum2017 · 24/11/2022 08:47

If criminal justice system worked properly people wouldn't take matters in to their own hands like this. She did the correct, legal thing in the first place and went to the police and then he was bailed, unremorseful at that, to a house across the road from them. I can't imagine a decent mother would be able to stop herself from going round.

barbrahunter · 24/11/2022 08:48

She has my full support x

Sevensins · 24/11/2022 08:49

My mum and dad looked into getting a hitman to sort out the paedophile who abused me. They didnt. A couple of years later my dad commited suicide. I wished my dad went to prison for killing him, than killing himself.

barneshome · 24/11/2022 08:49

As a Chinese colleague said
The Uk thinks they are better than us because we execute murderers and sex offenders
In China we do not think that keeping people like that alive and upsetting the victims and there families is in any way civilized

Rockingcloggs · 24/11/2022 08:50

Seeing what sentences these sex offenders receive for ruining children's lives makes it apparent that justice is not served.

No, I don't suppose two wrongs do make a right but his death means there is one less c*nt in the world so let's at least take some pleasure in his demise.

It is a shame that her actions have created, to some degree, issues in her relationship with the boys and I think had I been in their shoes, I could only truly understand what she had done when I became a parent myself, where I know that I couldn't say for sure I wouldn't do the same.

user1471462428 · 24/11/2022 08:50

One of our family friends did similar she stabbed her husband to death when she found abusing their son. She has only served 6 years inside and most of that was in an open prison.
I’ve never judged her for it because I think there is a possibility I would have done the same. I believe in justice, however, I don’t think our system ever truly can rehabilitate child abuser’s.

barneshome · 24/11/2022 08:50

Stressedmum2017 · 24/11/2022 08:47

If criminal justice system worked properly people wouldn't take matters in to their own hands like this. She did the correct, legal thing in the first place and went to the police and then he was bailed, unremorseful at that, to a house across the road from them. I can't imagine a decent mother would be able to stop herself from going round.

The justice system is not allowed to be harsher
The BBC and Guardian and the wokes would be up in arms and all parties are trying to get the woke vote

SomePosters · 24/11/2022 08:51

Love all these trust the systems types

Show of hands then… how many of you trust the system types can tell me
the conviction rates for this kind of thing?

I went through the conviction process once and it caused more angst and agony spread over years. Starting with the medical exam.

wouldn’t wish it on anyone tbh and I would certainly never put myself through it again

MrsSchrute · 24/11/2022 08:52

The bloodlust and theirst for vengeance on this thread is really unsettling.
This is not how a civilized society behaves.

SouperNoodle · 24/11/2022 08:52

If it were up to me, I'd have spared her jail.
If someone abuses your children and you kill them, you should be celebrated for protecting yours and any other children that have/will be abused by that person 🤷‍♀️

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