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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To feel angry at Tory voters?

740 replies

Dottodo · 02/08/2022 00:52

DF has always voted Tory. He’s very anti immigration and we will never see each other’s POV.
DHs friends are all Tory voters and hate being with them as they are all racist, xenophobic & misogynistic.
Other Tory voters I know through work or extended family members are also xenophobic and casually racist.
I’ve spoken to friends about this and they agree that the Tory voters they personally know are also racist and xenophobic.
Why is this?
Me and DH lived abroad and as we've lived as ‘foreigners’, we don’t share their views.

OP posts:
theChickenDinner · 02/08/2022 01:32

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Danceswithkids · 02/08/2022 01:34

Of course the Tories know what a woman is, how else would they know who to screw over?

I actually think most people in this country end up voting for 'the party they hate least'.

And then a bunch of incompetent and/or corrupt politicians make decisions to keep themselves on top, but it's all right because we had the democratic choice of which bunch of short sighted self serving wankers are screwing us.

MrsTerryPratchett · 02/08/2022 01:35

You know what I think...

Everyone needs to stop playing party politics and decide what we want for the place we live. Can we agree on anything? Because I think so much is based on people disagreeing about HOW not WHAT.

GreenLunchBox · 02/08/2022 01:37

Carlycat · 02/08/2022 01:09

Labour have lost my vote as they don't know what a woman is. They're forcing labour voters to the right with their misogynist far left politics. As a life long labour voter my next vote is Tory. At least they have the balls to stand up to woke identify politics

BINGO 😂

GreenLunchBox · 02/08/2022 01:38

OP, how did you managed to be married to someone with fundamentally different views to you? It doesn't add up 🤔

GreenLunchBox · 02/08/2022 01:40

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You're on a roll tonight and I'm here for it 😂

MangyInseam · 02/08/2022 01:44

MrsTerryPratchett · 02/08/2022 01:07

Just because the Tories are arseholes, it doesn't mean Labour aren't. They can all be racist, sexist wankers. It's not a binary choice. Except it unfortunately is politically.

Show quote history

Most people vote one or the other. Most of them are pretty normal people.

apintortwo · 02/08/2022 01:47

OP, how did you managed to be married to someone with fundamentally different views to you? It doesn't add up

Leftie marries Tory for the money but keeps on despising and slating said Tory whilst enjoying her new lifestyle and the £££

theChickenDinner · 02/08/2022 01:51

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BerryBerryBerryBerry · 02/08/2022 01:51

Grow up

GreenLunchBox · 02/08/2022 01:52

apintortwo · 02/08/2022 01:47

OP, how did you managed to be married to someone with fundamentally different views to you? It doesn't add up

Leftie marries Tory for the money but keeps on despising and slating said Tory whilst enjoying her new lifestyle and the £££

Can't imagine that being a thing

MangyInseam · 02/08/2022 01:56

MrsTerryPratchett · 02/08/2022 01:30

I'll say this for Conservative voters: they appear to have the ability to disagree politely.

I think I agree. But I do think that's really because Conservatism is about mildly self-centred pragmatism. Evil Lite if you will. They know people die because of Tory policies so they're not as angry as lefties. Lefties are angry because they know they're the goodies but can't seem to win. It's frustrating. The Tories know they have rats' anuses on their helmets, they just don't care.

You think conservative policies kill people, but not left policies? The French Revolution? Stalin?

OzziePopPop · 02/08/2022 02:01

Honestly, neither Dh or I know how o vote anymore. We’ve always been very ‘floating’ and have voted for each main party at different times over the last 20 + years. Now… no clue!

feistyoneyouare · 02/08/2022 02:02

apintortwo · 02/08/2022 01:47

OP, how did you managed to be married to someone with fundamentally different views to you? It doesn't add up

Leftie marries Tory for the money but keeps on despising and slating said Tory whilst enjoying her new lifestyle and the £££

That's a vile thing to say.

Nancydrawn · 02/08/2022 02:13

GreenLunchBox · 02/08/2022 01:38

OP, how did you managed to be married to someone with fundamentally different views to you? It doesn't add up 🤔

She did not. Her father, and her husband's friends, do.

Hottytotty · 02/08/2022 02:13

GreenLunchBox · 02/08/2022 01:38

OP, how did you managed to be married to someone with fundamentally different views to you? It doesn't add up 🤔

OP says her DF - not her DH - is a Tory voter (but that DH’s friends are as well).
FWIW, I am a currently lapsed Tory voter (am a remainer/centrist so haven’t seen eye to eye since 2016), but have hung on as a party member purely to vote in leadership elections. I voted against Boris last time but am a bit stumped this time around as I am not really drawn to either candidate Confused.
I’m not racist (have close family members of various ethnicities, and have lived all over the world), and believe that immigration is essential to a successful economy, and that we owe a duty of care to refugees.

Original poster
Dottodo · 02/08/2022 02:17

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Because we don’t see his friends very often. Weddings and funerals mainly. He’s grown apart from them as they’ve become more intolerant with age. DH doesn’t share their views so why wouldn’t I remain married to him?!

OP posts:
Original poster
Dottodo · 02/08/2022 02:19

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

You can think whatever you like but that wasn’t my intention.

OP posts:
Original poster
Dottodo · 02/08/2022 02:20

Govesdancingpartner · 02/08/2022 01:27

This^ op you contradict your post..your dh is xenophobic if he is anti immigration.
But you BOTH do not share his friends views.
Yep you definitely want to start a bun fight

Show quote history

DF is anti immigration not DH!!!

OP posts:
Original poster
Dottodo · 02/08/2022 02:23

apintortwo · 02/08/2022 01:14

Errmm.. where to start with this...

You are quite bigoted to suggest that all Tory voters are the same.

Your OP doesn't seem sufficiently articulate or well thought out

Me and DH lived abroad and as we've lived as ‘foreigners’, we don’t share their views

Where have you lived? Living abroad is not the same as settling as an immigrant

My post is based on the on the people around me as that is what I have experienced.
We have lived in Italy, France and the States.
I wouldn’t say I’m a diehard Labour voter, just refuse to vote Tory and there isn’t really another viable party to vote for.

OP posts:
Original poster
Dottodo · 02/08/2022 02:26

GreenLunchBox · 02/08/2022 01:38

OP, how did you managed to be married to someone with fundamentally different views to you? It doesn't add up 🤔

Read my post again. DF has the different views not DH!

OP posts:
Dottodo · 02/08/2022 02:27

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MintJulia · 02/08/2022 02:43

And Labour voters aren't ! 😂

We live in a fairly polarised society. There are racists and xenophobes in every group of people, including the Tory party, the Labour Party, the met police, the W.I......

There are decent people there too. Getting yourself all twisted out of line because you don't like someone's views is only going to damage you.

Willyoujustbequiet · 02/08/2022 02:48

Yanbu.

They just really aren't very nice people.

Midnightblack · 02/08/2022 02:50

I don’t think that the fact that the next PM will be Asian or a woman is a great testament to Tory diversity. There’s very little diversity of thought inthe Tory party and they are great ones for lip service.