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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

What would YOU do?

403 replies

Lyonic · 13/02/2022 19:06

I have twin boys aged 2 and a half who will be starting nursery soon. While it has been a struggle to get to this stage theough covid, the idea of freeing up some time to get the house in order unmolested! Cant wait.

The issue is that my mother who has been retired for over a year has not offered any support for childcare. I was left in the care of my grandparents for 3 hours a day, Mon - Fri, yet us asking help for 1 day a week is crossing a line?

I feel im im the right but wanted to know what you think?

OP posts:
Seaweasel · 13/02/2022 21:53

Not all GPs want to look after children. Mine are very loving but didn't. In fact, they generously contributed to nursery fees instead, for which I was very grateful. However, when the kids were at secondary school, they were very happy to share their hobbies and interests with the children, DIY, needlework, carpentry and gardening. Don't mess up your relationship with your family just because you want some childcare. Your children will really benefit from having good relationships with their GP in the future.

slashlover · 13/02/2022 21:53

[quote weansu]@slashlover but many Western countries are overpopulated due to people living longer not because of too many dc. And you are saying overpopulation is a bad thing, or is it only bad to have too many young people? [/quote]
Obviously overpopulation is a bad thing, I thought everyone was aware of this?

Original poster
Lyonic · 13/02/2022 21:54

@Skilovingmama

She never once mentioned race, you did.

Seeing as the world’s population has doubled in the past 70 years you don’t have to be a genius to see that there is zero threat of the population dying out. So those who say that clearly mean certain types of people.

With travel being the way it is, we will all be the same colour in a few hundred years anwayway? Who cares about colour!

We need more babies! :)

OP posts:
Antsgomarching · 13/02/2022 21:54

Its comforting to know I’ve done my bit for humanity 😬. I get it, we don’t have alone time unless DD is sleeping but honestly she doesn’t owe you childcare, 1 toddler can be a handful. It would be wonderful if she did (god knows I get jealous of other people who have grandparents happy to babysit) but tbh when I had DD I knew we wouldn’t have any help. It is what it is.

weansu · 13/02/2022 21:55

Obviously overpopulation is a bad thing, I thought everyone was aware of this?

So what do you suggest we do about all the people living longer?

Pumperthepumper · 13/02/2022 21:55

There’s absolutely no way I’ll be doing anyone’s childcare in my retirement. Not a chance.

Skilovingmama · 13/02/2022 21:56

With travel being the way it is, we will all be the same colour in a few hundred years anwayway? Who cares about colour!

We need more babies!

Huh? Says who? I will ask you again, do you ever read a newspaper or take any interest in what is going on in the world? You sound not only really nasty but also really thick.

Original poster
Lyonic · 13/02/2022 21:57

[quote weansu]@slashlover but many Western countries are overpopulated due to people living longer not because of too many dc. And you are saying overpopulation is a bad thing, or is it only bad to have too many young people? [/quote]
There ia no overpopulation in any western country though? We actually import a lot of specialist workers to help with shortfall!

OP posts:
weansu · 13/02/2022 21:57

These threads will be a thing of the past soon. Younger generations won't get to have a retirement unless they are very very wealthy!

Chloemol · 13/02/2022 21:57

All these childless career women, dreading the dawn as they drink the last of the red wine, while picking out the cat hair

What a nasty comment

Yes you would like your mother to help out but she doesn’t want to, amd is not obliged to

Just move on

Ginger1982 · 13/02/2022 21:58

"It's the way the western world operates now aparently. All these childless career women, dreading the dawn as they drink the last of the red wine, while picking out the cat hair."

What a horrible thing to say OP.

slashlover · 13/02/2022 21:58

@weansu

Obviously overpopulation is a bad thing, I thought everyone was aware of this?

So what do you suggest we do about all the people living longer?

Nothing...but maybe not act as if we're saving the world's population by having kids.
Original poster
Lyonic · 13/02/2022 21:58

@Skilovingmama

With travel being the way it is, we will all be the same colour in a few hundred years anwayway? Who cares about colour!

We need more babies!

Huh? Says who? I will ask you again, do you ever read a newspaper or take any interest in what is going on in the world? You sound not only really nasty but also really thick.

Id love to take this to messages and keep everything public above board. Dont throw any cats at me! (like that lady from simpsons lol!)
OP posts:
Skilovingmama · 13/02/2022 21:59

So what do you suggest we do about all the people living longer?

Do you mean in this country? Or globally? Because I’m not sure that the countries with a really high birth rate also have high life expectancy.
Anyway, in this country, we have a severe housing crisis, overcrowding on roads, fights for school places and much more. We don’t need more people, full stop. Any temporary issues in terms of job shortages can be solved through immigration (and this is where people show their true colours because they want people but not those sorts of people).

NatashaBedwouldbenice · 13/02/2022 22:00

Have you had a drink OP?

Skilovingmama · 13/02/2022 22:01

Id love to take this to messages and keep everything public above board. Dont throw any cats at me! (like that lady from simpsons lol!)

And seriously, do not message me. I have no desire to have a conversation with you via DMs.

MulticolourTulips · 13/02/2022 22:02

All these childless career women, dreading the dawn as they drink the last of the red wine, while picking out the cat hair

Charming.

slashlover · 13/02/2022 22:02

Id love to take this to messages and keep everything public above board. Dont throw any cats at me! (like that lady from simpsons lol!)

We get it OP, childfree woman are just bitter and have a loads of cats, you're superior because of your kids.

weansu · 13/02/2022 22:02

@Lyonic the issue in many western countries is the impact of an ageing population & the lack of planning. Apparently it's going to cost a fortune, the health & social care levy certainly won't be enough!

weansu · 13/02/2022 22:03

Nothing...but maybe not act as if we're saving the world's population by having kids.

Well that's not why I had kids! Nonetheless there is issues with ageing populations.

NeverDropYourMooncup · 13/02/2022 22:04

Maybe she took a job because she couldn't cope with/hated parenting 24/7.

It would make perfect sense if somebody who needed her parents to 'free' her from a toddler/small child really, really didn't volunteer to have two at once.

milkyaqua · 13/02/2022 22:04

It's the way the western world operates now aparently. All these childless career women, dreading the dawn as they drink the last of the red wine, while picking out the cat hair.

Say what, now?

While you bravely pick up the slack for the perpetuation of the human race...

FFS. You had children because you wanted to and now you expect your parents to mind them ('twins', hahaha) because they had help. It doesn't work like that. People have free-will.

cherrybonbons · 13/02/2022 22:05

Lol hoariest post ever.
All the replies from OP
To start- unmolested. Odd choice of words.
Cold and selfish (about people who use the forum)
And now making it about class. I haven't even got to the end of the thread yet but I am laughing.
What exactly do you want to gain from this OP. Because it doesn't sound like childcare

cherrybonbons · 13/02/2022 22:05

Goadiest post is what I meant 🤦‍♀️

slashlover · 13/02/2022 22:05

@weansu

Nothing...but maybe not act as if we're saving the world's population by having kids.

Well that's not why I had kids! Nonetheless there is issues with ageing populations.

I never said it was, op has said several times that the world population would run out if she didn't have kids.

There are issues with aging populations in certain countries.

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