Has my date stolen my keys??

[Wilhelmine]

I’ve just come home with a guy I’ve been for a few dates with after a couple of drinks and we’ve had a coffee and he’s gone home. We’ve been getting on great and knew each other before as acquaintances. He’s a bit intense but nothing scary until tonight when he said “I don’t know what I’d do if this doesn’t work out”. Now I’ve just got ready for bed and can’t find my keys anywhere. I’m well organised and tidy and always know where things are. I’ve messaged him to ask if he picked them up by mistake but no reply. Am I being daft to think he might have taken them? If I can’t find them in the morning I’ll have to get the locks changed and I really don’t want to have to do that.....

It is probably completely a non event, and you will find your keys in the morning. Still, your life is precious, either secure your house with bolts or get the fuck out of there tonight until you find keys/ change the locks. Unfortunately, men can't be trusted.

Yes def too much too soon @Justilou1. He offered to but me a £500 coffee table yesterday...I feel sick and really pissed off that I’ll have to take the morning off work to get the locks changed. But why oh why would he have taken the keys if he wants a future with me?

Stick a chair under the door handle. Have a shower and go to bed. Look again in the morning and change locks if you can’t find them. Politely tell date it’s not working for you. Call friend to come over for tomorrow evening. It will be much easier by this time tomorrow.

You can lock my door from the inside without keys I assume most doors have this ability

No, neither out front or back doors have this ability.

*our

If he took them it’s to get copies and have access without permission because he’s a creep.

@BlankTimes: My thoughts too.

Because he's crackers??

Sorry, not helpful but just demonstrates that this man is to be avoided

Did you check all your coat pockets and inside the coat cupboard / under the coat rack in case they fell inside a shoe?

If you don’t normally loose your keys, then it sounds suspicious to me. I wouldn’t trust his reply either way if you were to ask him in the morning, definitely get your locks replaced, safety first.

Oh that’s a shame mine has a lock that you can twist round, I think op said her door can be padlocked from the inside as well so at least she doesn’t have to worry about him getting in

Intuition is to be listened to. If you’ve checked everywhere obvious then lean on the side of caution. Hopefully in the morning, daylight will help.

A 'friend' who lived a few doors down from me took spare keys from my house and was letting himself in when I was at work. I only found out because we were sent home from work one night early and a tape I listened to constantly wasn't in the tape player. Really upsetting and disturbing.

Change the locks in the morning.

@Wilhelmine

Do I call him in the morning to see if he’s got them? Trouble is I wouldn’t trust him now no matter what he said so unless the keys turn up (have looked absolutely everywhere), I don’t think I should see him again.

Yes, call in the morning

You can't keep dating him if he's got them

You're sure they're not down the side of the sofa etc?

Down the side of the sofa
Coat pocket
Bag pocket
Fridge
Top of fireplace
Behind a photo frame
Kicked under the sofa or coffee table
Kitchen cupboard

@Wilhelmine

Do I call him in the morning to see if he’s got them? Trouble is I wouldn’t trust him now no matter what he said so unless the keys turn up (have looked absolutely everywhere), I don’t think I should see him again.

NO!

Bolt that door put some stuff in hall wall that will make the noise and relook then change the locks needed. It's really not worth the risk and either way you need to lock the door.

An ex of mine did this with my phone, after he'd gone l was tearing my hair out looking for it. I had a land-line at tgd time so rang him from that and went apesbit at him saying l knew he had it and l had rang provider and they'd told me it traced to his area (l did but they couldn't help me as it happened) and my next call was to the police unless he returned it within the hour. He did and then stalked me for 6 months, proper lunatic, think he just wanted go through my phone

@TurnUpTurnip

Oh that’s a shame mine has a lock that you can twist round, I think op said her door can be padlocked from the inside as well so at least she doesn’t have to worry about him getting in

I've only ever seen locks like that in flats tbh.

Wouldn’t think it’s him apart from the scary comment earlier and the fact that he was really full on when we first got together...

You clearly saw red flags from the beginning and yet continued to date him? I would take this missing keys issue seriously. He very well may have stolen them. Creeps have done far worse. Change your locks, stop dating him, and start listening to your instincts.

Have you dropped them outside when you took them out of the door?

How did PP get "hysteria" from your post? Christ I hate that.
OP, this guy has obviously set off all your warning klaxons and I think you should listen.
Of course it's possible you've dropped the keys. But the fact that this was your first instinct based speaks volumes. You know he's a wrong'un already.
I'd definitely change the locks if you don't find them by morning and block this fella. Ugh.

as well as getting the locks changed, is it worth fitting a smart doorbell too?
Good that you have bolts to feel safe tonight.

Check bathroom and loo if you have a separate one. Coat pockets. Underneath the sofa. Inside fridge and inside any cupboards you might have opened.