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Original poster

Has my date stolen my keys??

999 replies

Wilhelmine · 28/11/2021 23:48

I’ve just come home with a guy I’ve been for a few dates with after a couple of drinks and we’ve had a coffee and he’s gone home. We’ve been getting on great and knew each other before as acquaintances. He’s a bit intense but nothing scary until tonight when he said “I don’t know what I’d do if this doesn’t work out”. Now I’ve just got ready for bed and can’t find my keys anywhere. I’m well organised and tidy and always know where things are. I’ve messaged him to ask if he picked them up by mistake but no reply. Am I being daft to think he might have taken them? If I can’t find them in the morning I’ll have to get the locks changed and I really don’t want to have to do that.....

OP posts:
Werehamster · 29/11/2021 01:05

My advice is that as you are safe for tonight, go to bed and have another look in the morning with fresh eyes.

I do know someone who lost her keys and a neighbor found them and had been going in their house and stealing small things for months before she got found out, so it does happen.

Do you have a doorbell cam? Maybe a good idea to install one, just in case.

Hopefully, you will find them in the morning though and can go to work.

PigletJohn · 29/11/2021 01:05

If he was the sort of person to take keys, it would be quite possible to get them copied in the morning, let himself in, push them down the side of the sofa or behind the kettle, and say you had them all the time.

Have you got a lockable back door?

Have you got a chain or bolts on the front door?

caringcarer · 29/11/2021 01:05

Trust your gut feeling. If you suspect he has them he may well have them. He could get them copied. Get your locks change tomorrow for your own peace of mind.

HollaHolla · 29/11/2021 01:08

That’s one of the locks I have on my door….. however, insurance don’t ‘count’ it as being enough. I have two other 5(?) barrel locks, which are apparently harder to break into.
I’d say that if you’re at all suspicious, then get them changed. Or at least one of them… it’s a small price to pay for your peace of mind. Take care.

TurnUpTurnip · 29/11/2021 01:09

I’m in a house and have a lock on the inside, either way the op said she does and has padlocked it.

Agapornis · 29/11/2021 01:10

Trust your gut, but also if he says he doesn't have them, you can't really do much except leave it and change locks. Don't be like the angry man who accused me of stealing his passport.

HollaHolla · 29/11/2021 01:11

@HollaHolla

That’s one of the locks I have on my door….. however, insurance don’t ‘count’ it as being enough. I have two other 5(?) barrel locks, which are apparently harder to break into. I’d say that if you’re at all suspicious, then get them changed. Or at least one of them… it’s a small price to pay for your peace of mind. Take care.
This was about one of the turny style locks on the inside. There was a quote fail. 🤦🏻‍♀️
LinoVentura · 29/11/2021 01:12

He’s a bit intense but nothing scary until tonight when he said “I don’t know what I’d do if this doesn’t work out”.

That's a very bizarre thing to come out with.

I think you need to ask him if he has the keys. If he does and returns them, you still need to change the locks and get rid of him from your life.

Original poster
Wilhelmine · 29/11/2021 01:16

I’ve checked everywhere again, in the fridge , down the sides of the sofas etc etc. I really don’t think they’re in the house and I’m so painfully tidy I know I would have found them by now. So I used them to get in, put them down somewhere and now they’re gone. I’ve checked outside and couldn’t find them so the only remote possibility is that I dropped them and someone picked them up. But how likely is that?

OP posts:
ApolloandDaphne · 29/11/2021 01:17

I need keys to lock my door.

This sounds very odd OP. You need to make sure you are safe. There are some strange people out there and he may be one of them.

QuestionNumberOne · 29/11/2021 01:23

Sounds likely he took them. Lots of glaring red flags here.

Bolt the door and change the locks in the morning.

SiobhanSharpe · 29/11/2021 01:23

Your keys are missing. They are either lost or your BF has them.
Either way, you need to bolt your doors tonight, put a wedge under them if possible, and call a locksmith in the morning.

Isbdm · 29/11/2021 01:26

Trust your gut and change the locks.

Turtletotem · 29/11/2021 01:29

It's strange he hasn't answered your message too. Hopefully you'll find them in the morning.

Original poster
Wilhelmine · 29/11/2021 01:35

Yes @Turtletotem and I tried calling as well. Odd.

OP posts:
thefourgp · 29/11/2021 01:36

Sounds like he took them. Probably so he can pretend to ‘find them and be a good guy giving them back to you’ after he’s made a copy he can use to nosey around your home when you’re not there. It sounds far fetched but there are some strange people out there and you can’t take the risk. Get the locks changed asap if you don’t find them in the morning,

thefourgp · 29/11/2021 01:37

Whatever happens. Don’t see him again. That comment was too intense. You can’t be someone’s reason for living after a couple of weeks.

Almostmenopausal · 29/11/2021 01:40

@Wilhelmine Are your car keys on them as well??

MysteriousSoup · 29/11/2021 01:40

@JustaPOV

Listen to your gut. He obviously makes you feel uncomfortable and so if there’s any chance that he might have them, set your alarm overnight and change locks tomorrow if keys don’t show up.
This Take care OP
JesusIsAnyNameFree · 29/11/2021 01:40

@thefourgp

Sounds like he took them. Probably so he can pretend to ‘find them and be a good guy giving them back to you’ after he’s made a copy he can use to nosey around your home when you’re not there. It sounds far fetched but there are some strange people out there and you can’t take the risk. Get the locks changed asap if you don’t find them in the morning,
Sounds very Joe Goldberg.
Aussiegirl123456 · 29/11/2021 01:42

Oh god please come back in the morning to let us know you’re ok and then definitely get the locks changed.
This happened to our neighbour when I was a child, the keys turned up but not until after the plumber had the key copied. The guy used to go into her house while she was at work and go through her things. She didn’t know him at all other than he moved her radiator. It was in the papers and everything as he got a prison sentence for stalking.

Get a ring doorbell maybe?

Almostmenopausal · 29/11/2021 01:43

@JesusIsAnyNameFree With respect, so did a lot of the most heinous crimes to ever be committed - but they were still committed regardless.

Turtletotem · 29/11/2021 01:44

Is this the first time he's been to your house? I'd get the locks changed.

Pinkbonbon · 29/11/2021 01:45

He probably sensed you were backing away so took them so that you'd have to meet him again.

If he texts to say he has them, reply telling him he can just chuck them as you've just changed your locks.

Then slow fade for a couple of days. Then tell him youve been thinking and this isn't for you, you're just not feeling it.

Don't meet him again.

Intense in the beginning is a huge red flag.
Always.

Listen to your gut, it's bang on.

Pinkbonbon · 29/11/2021 01:50

Oh and if he knows when you'll next be out (eg: work scedule) don't go out until your locks are changed.