Has my date stolen my keys??

[Wilhelmine]

I’ve just come home with a guy I’ve been for a few dates with after a couple of drinks and we’ve had a coffee and he’s gone home. We’ve been getting on great and knew each other before as acquaintances. He’s a bit intense but nothing scary until tonight when he said “I don’t know what I’d do if this doesn’t work out”. Now I’ve just got ready for bed and can’t find my keys anywhere. I’m well organised and tidy and always know where things are. I’ve messaged him to ask if he picked them up by mistake but no reply. Am I being daft to think he might have taken them? If I can’t find them in the morning I’ll have to get the locks changed and I really don’t want to have to do that.....

@Wafflesnsniffles

How did you drive home/get back into your house without your keys? (practical question!) Im with you op Id be tempted to replace them too.

She had them in the house. Now she doesn’t.

Check weird places like the fridge / freezer, if you made drinks.
Tea / coffee cupboard.
Bathroom cupboard.
In your shoes.
Retrace all your steps since getting in.
And pray to St Anthony - patron saint of lost things!
Good luck.

Weird, if he has taken them I’m not sure he’d tell you would he? Does he know you have bolts inside the door?

Practicalities first:

Is one of your locks a barrel lock? They're a basic £30 replacement from B&Q (open at 7am) till you can get something else if you want to go higher end.

Needs a screwdiver.

^^ Yale barrel lock type

A few thoughts.

Your alarm bells are ringing about your date and coincidentally your keys have gone missing. I reckon you are connecting the two because of these uneasy feelings but it is quite likely you have lost the keys somehow? This happened to me on a date recently. I clearly misplaced them.

does he even know where you live? If not, what would his motivation be for taking them?

Sounds like you shouldn't see him again and I hope you get the keys sorted. I had to get the locks changed and it is painful on the bank balance and a big inconvenience!

Regardless of whether he took them or not... clearly the fact you think he may have, combined with the comments and intensity that are bother you, I think you shouldn't see him again.
If the keys don't turn up by tomorrow, change the lock as well.

Instinct and situational awareness warn us of potential threats, if you didn't have concerns about this guy you wouldn't be suspecting him.

Cross post with Lucia23

Keys or no keys, clearly this isn't the guy for you.

does he even know where you live? If not, what would his motivation be for taking them?

It’s the first line of the OP…

@MaryAndGerryLivingInDerry

does he even know where you live? If not, what would his motivation be for taking them?

It’s the first line of the OP…

Sorry. Not firing on all cylinders tonight.

In that case I understand the concern but it is good you have the bolts in place. Hope you find them and if not, good luck with changing the locks. Know how stressful it is without this added layer!

How can OP double lock her door without keys?

Do I call him in the morning to see if he’s got them? Trouble is I wouldn’t trust him now no matter what he said so unless the keys turn up (have looked absolutely everywhere), I don’t think I should see him again.

You can lock my door from the inside without keys I assume most doors have this ability

I'd look for them again and then get an emergency locksmith - well my neighbour is one so I can sort easily lol but costs a lot!! So do check carefully before calling a locksmith out.

@TurnUpTurnip

You can lock my door from the inside without keys I assume most doors have this ability

Mine doesn’t. If I lose the key when the door is unlocked anyone can get in if they open the handle.

Like some other posters, I had to re-read your post a few times - he was inside your home and then left, and that's how you've come to be inside your home and be worried he's taken your keys.

If it was me, I'd probably have misplaced them, because I lose things all the time. But if you genuinely think he's taken your keys, I think you should keep the doors bolted and call a locksmith. When women have niggly feelings that a bloke has done something wrong, as daft as that something might be, women are usually right.

If the door is locked from the outside, can you unlock the door from the inside? (You can with some more modern locks, but not all of them.)

If it's possible to lock you in from the outside, I'd call the emergency locksmith. Otherwise, I'd just book one for sometime tomorrow (cheaper).

Also, if this guy is creeping you out for any reason, even if he hasn't taken your keys, you don't owe him another date.

Trust your gut. Fewer women get hurt that way.

Check all your pockets did you have a jacket on?

I lost an egg this morning still haven’t found no idea what I did with it DH thinks it is hilarious.

Can you retrace your steps? Did you go out at all.

I don't think you should see him again because you said he was too full on and pretty intense, that's enough

Change the locks anyway, if he suddenly realises he "picked them up by mistake" and returns them, he could have had copies made.

Sorry OP haven't RTFT, are you locked in? Just thing about it being a fire/safety hazard.

@Wilhelmine

Do I call him in the morning to see if he’s got them? Trouble is I wouldn’t trust him now no matter what he said so unless the keys turn up (have looked absolutely everywhere), I don’t think I should see him again.

I wouldn't bother since he made you feel uneasy enough that this has crossed your mind. If he does have them, he could have had copies made, and if he says he doesn't, you won't believe him.

Replace the barrel tomorrow.
Place a dining chair behind the front door obscuring the letterbox access.

Somethinf similar happened to a friend, keys had been copied, BF came over "phone's playing up, just got your message, came straight over ...") and helpfully spotted them somewhere we'd already looked ten times.
Knight in shining armour syndrome
People are strange.

I think you have to listen to your intuition here, keys or no keys… He seems to have a lot invested here. A bit too much, too soon?

Have you checked they are not in the lock on the outside of the door? I may have done that before!

What everyone else said re caution and practical steps and your gut - but do give St Anthony a go, he's great with keys!