Have I grown a second head without realising?

[Needspace21]

The last few days I have been hanging out alone as ex dp has the dcs over half term.
I've been on country walks, to cafes, to beaches etc., with my dogs. It's been lovely. One issue which has irked me slightly is how some people have really been staring at me. Is it because I'm a shameless 40 something out enjoying myself alone. Is that a crime? One woman in a cafe stared at me the whole time (to the point of ignoring her whole family sitting at the table with her). Another woman looked me up and down with distain when I went in her shop. Another woman scowled at me as I walked down the beach. Have people just got more starey? Do I look odd? What is going on?

Maybe they are The Times readers and objected to your existence, never mind presence, as a The Guardian reader?!

Any other sporners disappointed this isn’t about a very big spot?

Have you looked in a mirror to see if you have the remainders of lunch / a milk moustache on your face? 😁

I'd just smile and wave and say "hello!". That usually snaps people out of it but in a nice way.

People go out and do things alone every day of the week. I think you must have 2 heads

@Itsmemaggie yes!! I was expecting a picture of a huge ready to pop spot. Gutted!

Is it possible they'd be staring at your dogs? It's what I'd be doing

If you're that sure they're staring, it's not because you're out on your own with the dogs, or having a coffee. Hundreds of thousands of women do this every day, myself included, and no one stares.

Either, you're usually so distracted by DC you don't look around the café. Now you are looking round, as nothing else has your attention, and anyone that meets your glance you think is staring. Then they keep glancing over to see if you're still looking at them.

Or. Something else is drawing attention to you. Have you been sat in the coffee shop for three hours nursing one coffee? That would probably make the owner keep looking over. Have you taken the opportunity today to trial your neon pink Elton John glasses/other eye catching garment?

Do you talk to yourself? I have quite a strong internal monologue and if I'm really concentrating on something, especially if I'm walking my dog, I suspect my lips might twitch a bit! Probably makes me look completely mad 🤣 so people might look for that reason!

Read the thread about dogs being allowed in cafes and similar places and you'll see why you were getting glares!

When I see people with dogs I always look at them because I love dogs but I don't want my own so I live vicariously through strangers but I don't glare or stare, so all I can think of is as I said above.

Sounds like you have a chip on your shoulder. Why would someone stare at you in disdain for going into a shop? I always go the shops on my own.

I think you were paranoid about being on your own for some bizarre reason, so you were looking for people looking at you.

Are you walking with confidence like the women in a tv ad? The Bold advert springs to mind.

Maybe your appearance is against 'the norm?'
Maybe you have some behaviours that attract attention?
People don't generally stare unless there's a reason.

Or maybe you're too focussed on what others might think about you?

Everytime I looked up from my guardian newspaper in the cafe the woman was glaring at me.

Stealth boast alert! Why is the name of your newspaper relevant OP.

That often happens to me, too, late 50s.
Do what I do, tell yourself they just can’t get over how gorgeous you are

Lol how is a newspaper a stealth boast?

Yes, were you in the cafe and shop with your dogs?

@MrsSkylerWhite I shall try this 😁

@Carolinechanning it was an outdoor cafe in a country park so plenty of dogs there

I had a very interesting experience with a friend who may or may not have been like you.

We spent a few hours together out and about and three times she commented on how horrible people had been to her/us. I honestly thought these people had either been neutral or really friendly to us!

It was a very interesting insight into how she perceives others' behaviour!

I get this too Op , it’s so tedious, I guess it’s just the price I have to pay for being unbelievably stunning 😘

I'm a 40 something year old with a dog.happily married, never experienced this'

You were maybe feeling self conscious, or your dogs are exceptionally badly behaved.

I go out and about on my own all the time, including to restaurants and pubs, and I can honestly say I've never noticed anyone staring. People mind their own business and aren't that interested in strangers, unless perhaps you bear an uncanny resemblance to someone famous.

I think it's all in your own mind, over thinking and all that. If you think they are all staring at you, you must be looking at them as well.. some women may stare at you, if you are wearing something snazzy and bright, and some men may stare at you if you have a voluptuous body, just a thought !! or maybe you were wearing your pyjamas outside .

What was on the cover of the paper? Were they staring at that?