Just want an empty house so I can use the loo

[needemptyhouse]

Am I the only person who wants an empty house when I need to do a number two?

It's like I get stage fright if there are others in the house.

Obviously lockdown is not helping as I am never home alone.

I will wait sometimes until I'm having a shower and use the loo then but sometimes I can't really hold it without getting very sore.

Tell me I'm not the only one please.

I’m like it at public bathrooms...not my own

I'm sure there will be others who are the same but I'm not sorry.. Can't imagine being like that in my own home (slightly more understandable in a public loo or friend's house). How about having a radio outside the door and putting that on as you go in?

DP and I live in a one bedroom flat with zero privacy. It’s a weird layout which means the bathroom is central to the whole flat and has a door to the bedroom plus a door to the hallway.
Him not going to work is killing me!

You don't need people to reinforce your anxiety. You're going to make yourself ill if you carry on like this. What do you think will happen if you poo whilst someone else is in the house?

Put some music on and say you're doing a face mask, painting toe nails etc. It might take the pressure off. This is what I do when we stay at the in laws in their tiny bungalow, where the bathroom is about 10 foot from the sofa

You’re going to end up with far more problems by holding stool and ignoring your bodies natural cues to empty your bowels.
I’m uncomfortable in other people’s houses when I’m staying over but you should feel safe and relaxed at home

When I get poo anxiety (which is almost never) I run the tap.

Is it that you're preventing yourself from trying to go, because you don't like the thought of people knowing you're in there?

Or can you not go at all if there are people around?

I'm not like this, and I think it sounds pretty unhealthy for you really so you need to find a way to get more comfortable.

@Orf1abc

You don't need people to reinforce your anxiety. You're going to make yourself ill if you carry on like this. What do you think will happen if you poo whilst someone else is in the house?

This, 100%! Just keep practising and trying op.

Get yourself an IBD that'll put an end to it!
Wish I had any choice in the matter. I literally have to go with a seconds notice !

I’m ok if it’s just family here but if we have a guest I can only go in the ensuite.
I also can’t poo in a public toilet or at anyone else’s house unless I am staying there

No lucky if someone doesn’t walk in to speak to you here so lucky to have the bathroom to yourself let alone the house.

I used to be like that at the beginning of our relationship. Not any more.

Not a thing in this house, there's no mystery left in this marriage at all!

I poo in public toilets without worrying too. But I dont like when extended family can hear, and i wouldn't like to hear them either.

We do have more than one bathroom but when I do go someone as in a child always seems to need me!

I guess I just feel more relaxed when home alone therefore can do a poo easily.

I also will not do one at work but am happy to do it in a public toilet !

It's the thought that others know what you are doing that puts me off I guess

I've got IBS D so B i this is nit an option for me. When I have to I have to wherever the toilet is.

You'll make yourself ill by withholding!

YABU

Everyone else who lives in your house also shits. And they really don’t care about your toilet habits.

I wouldn't like to live like that.

I have a "shitting radio" at home and when (in the dim and distant past ) we went camping I played my music on my phone and I felt right at home! I diid wait till I really needed to go however otherwise I can sit there farting for ages and I get a bit self conscious!! I remember sitting in an airport loo once pre flight (again ) watching the sofa scene in Friends and laughing like a drain!!

I think this is quite unusual but not unheard of.

As others have said it won't be doing you any good. What is your underlying worry and is it really rational?

Everyone poos!

I’m like that any where else except my house.

We’ve got more than 2 toilets in our house so I often go to the one that’s furthest away from everyone, like the en-suite one.

I tend not to go downstairs if my DH is reading in the living room incase he hears lol

I remember when we first got together and I was at his and the bathroom was right next to his bedroom and o would hold it in until I got home 🙈

I've always suffered with shy poos and can confirm my undercarriage is in tatters now.
Would you consider mentioning it to the GP?

I sometimes feel nervous in a public loo, but at home not at all.

Who else do you live with? Is it because you're in the early stages of a relationship? Or living with housemates? Is it maybe the sound or the smell that worries you?
Could you try putting the tap or shower on while you go? And invest in some "poo pouri" - it really does conceal the smell if you spray it before you go.
It's not good to hold in your poops!!

Do you have a bathroom fan you can switch on? Put some music from your phone on. Really just commit yourself to spend time in the loo and allow yourself more time than you need so that you don't get stressed about it, when you start to feel anxious, take a deep breath listen to your body, and try to relax your mind. Get up and do something else for ten-twenty minutes and go back in if you think you need it. It's all about giving yourself the grace to get it done, eventually, and don't beat yourself up about it.

Your family knows you poop, everyone does. They don't care that you're pooping and you don't care when they poop, so give yourself the same consideration. No one cares you're pooping! Don't worry about others.