Just want an empty house so I can use the loo

[needemptyhouse]

Am I the only person who wants an empty house when I need to do a number two?

It's like I get stage fright if there are others in the house.

Obviously lockdown is not helping as I am never home alone.

I will wait sometimes until I'm having a shower and use the loo then but sometimes I can't really hold it without getting very sore.

Tell me I'm not the only one please.

Generally it doesn't bother me but my grandparents have a bungalow with thin walls, a bathroom next to the living room and a family who love to take the piss, so when we stay there (pre Covid), I'd open a window, run the shower before I needed to, go to the toilet, flush, then have my shower. By the time you've washed hair, showered , brushed teeth etc there's no lingering smell and the running water covers any sound, you can also put a few sheets of paper in the bowl before you go.

No such luck at home, DS is two and fascinated by farts and poos, his latest thing is to categorise them by size 'small fart pardon me' 'massive fart, big pardon!' , this afternoon he was running around upstairs and I went to the toilet, I had to leave the door ajar because he's a daredevil and can't be trusted. DH came in from work a few hours later, DS ran straight up to him 'daddy, daddy, mummy massive poo upstairs, splash!'. Thanks son.

I grew up in a family OBSESSED with 'healthy bowels' and it was considered a straightforward and normal topic of conversation.

The legacy of this is that I can and do poo anywhere (as I am, somewhat ironically given the OP, terrified of the alternative).

My OH comes from a more faecally conservative background and it took him a few years to get to grips with my attitude...

Eckhart

Yes!
A long drop is a perfect loo! No splash, no smell and no worry about the terrible state of sewers.
Literally the only thing about life 100’s of years ago I think ‘ brilliant”.

Faecal impaction is pretty horrendous and I'd be wary of causing that. You need to develop coping strategies to allow you to adopt more normal bowel habits.

This is me!!! I used to go to my parents house same street and just sit on the loo for a bit obviously can’t go now so I find myself at weekends having to pretend run a bath/shower or pretend clean the room which gives a nice excuse to spray the dettol or whatever cover any smell, I live in a large 3 storey house and still get stage fright when I know folk are in. My partner is very considerate and has his 30 mins on the loo every morning between 6-7 before I wake up. Been together forever have shared all sorts of intimate things, including him checking my wounds from vaginal cyst ops but for some reason I’d rather he didn’t know I go number 2

DH wanted to replace the extractor fan in the bathroom with a quieter one. I told him absolutely not.

I dread to think what he saw/thought when I had our LO, but I still don't need him to hear me poo

I’m with you, I like to be alone in the house. When my friend and I were at college, we designated a toilet in the building which was a long way away from any other room “Pooh corner”, so one could do a number two without anyone going past or disturbing!

I have crohns so I don't have a choice when I go. Sometimes, if I'm particularly unlucky, I might not get a choice where either (thankfully not often!!!).

I soon stopped being embarrassed by the noises my body can make, though I do tend to clench and pray if I'm in a public place or at work!

I have no anxiety and feel bad for you if you did. I mean we all poo right?! 🤷‍♀️

I think this is more psychological and the worry of noises and smells!
But as others have commented, everyone have to go to the bathroom, think of people like Donald Trump (the arsehole) on the loo and everything should be ok!!

I go when and where ever I am if I need to, doesn't bother me

I am the same with toilets. Not now in my home as I'm married with 2 kids but when my dh and I first moved in together it used to really stress me out. I couldn't pee in front of him either (child birth tool away those barriers lol). It was made worse because he has no inhibitions when it comes to using the toilet.

*took.
Also to clarify I still won't have a number 2 in front of him but I can pee if I have to.

I’m the same. Once on holiday in a small apartment with 3 other women it made me quite ill. Eventually I told them to all go out one day and under no circumstances cone back. Within 15 mins of them going I went and after flying back I walked into my house and the urge to go came on almost instantly. It’s definitely psychological.

I’m exactly the same!!!
Never met anyone else with this sort of issue before
I totally get you. It’s more the sounds that I hate. I feel so embarrassed.. even tho everyone poi’s, Ibthi k Ingave a bit of a phobia around it. Also, I hate hearing other people go, the noises aoal me.. he he xx

I’m not like this but it does enrage me if anyone tries to talk to me when I’m in the loo. I end up shouting “I am in the LOO!!!” Over and over until they get the message. There are just ties I want a bit of peace.

Ok going at home if just us but struggled and got stressed about going if we either have guests or when we used to stay overnight at relatives houses or at work.

If it’s the potential for smell you fear - get some VIPoo spray - amazing stuff - use it when camping then don’t stress

I hate the thought of someone hearing me and knowing what I'm doing too. But I try and ignore this and do it as quietly as possible if people are nearby.

Please don't hold it in OP because as pps have said, you will make yourself ill. Put some toilet roll in the toilet before you go, do it and open the window.

14!
14 days I didn't ’go’ on one occasion!
I did myself a huge mischief. Oh, the pain was horrific!
I don't have an answer to the problem, but rest assured you are not alone.

I has a bout of gastroenteritis - it was bad!!!! I was very poorly, the mess was just something beyond reasonable.
Since then I've not been quite as reticent about going.
I always clean my bathroom every day too. Possibly twice daily.

It's a nervousness about being judged- even though it's a natural biological function. Noise, smell, mess, time! All of it being judged -or thought of about yourself, by other people.

The fear of people walking in on you, mid-action is why they need to leave. So you can relax enough to go. If they come home you then have time to sort yourself out before they walk in on you!

Yes YABU. Nobody cares about what you are doing in the loo.

It’s your house... why would you not just have a look when you need one?!
If you’ve got kids presumably your husband has seen you give birth? I think he knows that you poo!

I've been in the situation of having to poo when not at home, so I put loo paper in before I plop so there's no noise. We laugh about farts and our dumps in our house, but as I'm a retired nurse, I've seen and smelled every bowel evacuation under the sun.

Yes I have that too. Even as a kid I used to run the basin tap at home so my parents couldn’t hear I’ve been married for over 20 years but if we are staying in a hotel I make my husband put his headphones on and listen to music when I use the loo 😂