To ask what the shittest sex you ever had is?

[Magicra84]

Saw someone who absolutely insisted he wanted a proper relationship and not just FWB but the few times I saw him which led to sex he left within ten mins of sex ending. Sex was shit too. Three thrusts and he was done. Rubbish! As he was very good looking I hoped it would get better. I didn't give it chance to after he left immediately after twice.

I spent weeks sexting with a gorgeous guy, looked like a young Michael Douglas, incredibly sexy. Great kisser, but then he had a tiny penis. I’m not even sure how he managed to cum during foreplay because he didn’t seem to have an erection. He then sat in bed with the most miserable look on his face and I felt annoyed that I had to comfort him.

I've only had sex with three men. The only poor one being number 2, who was quite awkward and had a small penis but it wasn't nearly as terrible as some of these stories! My husband (3) is the best and we have a great sex life.

*What do you call a woman who has an orgasm every time she has sex?

A lesbian*

Brilliant!!

I have also had great sex with a man with a small penis, just to redress the balance (he..errr...compensated...) and awful sex with a big one (he'd had a wank before we went to bed and was another one of these 'the longer it goes on the better it is' ones). I actually went home before he finished because I had things to do!

A few ons when I was young. I soon realised why men like ons and women are less keen. Thrust thrust finished. Orgasms might be made in the mind but I'd have a better time without some sweaty rugby lad collapsed on top of me.
Now I do casual meets but via the internet to vet them and lay out expectations eg I get several orgasms before they get any

The guy who drooled on me as he came. Not deliberately, I probably would have slapped him if it was. It had been shit sex anyway, he was barely moving, but that was the definite lowlight.

there's no bad sex for me tbh
I'm usually either satisfied or indifferent, meh

but if a had to pick the worst one, I think it would be one of my first times (?) that bf was terrible and like he didn't even care about what would be good for me. I like it when partners have sex to enjoy in together and make each other feel good, and not just to fulfill their own needs.

GinDaddyRedux

Orgasms are made in the mind 🤮 that was a bad start... Then you got worse, yuk 🤢

I think it is pretty nasty to slag guys with small penis's. It's not like that is a feature they can help or work on. How would you feel about being slagged for being a crap shag for having baggy vagina's or saggy tits?

And no I am not a bloke. Just don't like people being attacked for anything about their physicality they can't choose.

I wonder what men would say asked this question? Without them having read this thread I mean. What would they describe as bad sex?

I had a friend at uni who dated a very adventurous woman who dripped hot wax on him. He was more terrified than turned on, bearing in mind it was 30 years ago.

Generally though, what would a bloke say?

Errr prob when I was a teen and it slipped and it pulled his foreskin bk and he ended up with a bubble and agony. Or when people have slipped and cut me and ended up bleeding but husband is fine never any issues. Can orgasm if my mind is right and only if I'm on top on sofa or works on friction but when hes on top its nice but that friction is what makes the orgasm also if hes shaved it wont work neither

Taking the post title literally, this happened to a friend of mine in the 90s when he was in his late teens. He was out in Notting Hill with his hot new girlfriend and they got 'the urge.' They climbed a fence into one of those (private) communal gardens, found a discreet corner (it was nighttime) and proceeded to do the deed. Three minutes into this he noticed a really strong smell of dog crap. He ran his fingers through his hair and… yep, it was everywhere. Although they were on a night out in Notting Hill he lived in deepest darkest SE London – they had to get a tube, an overground train and a bus after trying unsuccessfully to wash his hair in bottled water.

This guy with a really tiny penis - he kept pulling out and using his fingers mid-shag, presumably because his fingers were bigger! We only did it the once.

Fancied a lad from my local shop for ages. Finally found him on Facebook and we got chatting. Turned out he was only 19 (I was 26 ) but I fancied the arse off him so invited him round when ds was at his dad’s , had a bit of a chat and realised he was an idiot and couldn’t really hold a conversation. But I was tipsy and horny so upstairs we went. Told him to wear a condom, he said ‘ you already have one kid, what difference would another make’. For some absolutely insane reason I didn’t immediately ask him to leave, he out the condom on and we got to it.... no word of a lie he came twice in 4 minutes. Literally one thrust and done, another thrust and done again. He then started making racist and homophobic remarks so I asked him to leave and vowed never to be that desperate for a shag ever ever again.

A day later he messaged to me to see if I’d had a good time because he thought it was ‘a bit strange that I didn’t make any noise’. I replied that I didn’t have time to make any noise because it was over so soon, blocked him and found a new local shop! Worst sex ever

“guide me inside you"

Full body wince at that!

I clicked on this thread hoping to laugh, and while I have, I’m actually pretty depressed at some of these stories. It’s still a mans world, and that includes orgasms.

And yes, obviously it’s not a guy’s fault if it’s tiny and you’ve got to feel sorry for them. But the thread is asking us to describe shit sex, it’s not meant to be a support group for men with tiny dicks.

notanother I too had a bad experience with a guy with a small penis but possibly it was more my problem than his but it was so small I couldn't feel it. He did indulge in foreplay which was fine but I felt dissatisfied with the actual sex bit and it put me off.

Definitely the hammering. That is so boring and quite violating.

Where do I start !

Yeah it's not the guy's fault if he's got a tiny dick, I get that. But sadly sex is never going to be amazing with a 3 inch erection. Whether a woman has a looser vagina or not, that isn't touching the sides for most grown women.

Sex isn't all about penetration for me, so I don't care about the size of the penis. Just so many men know so little about the female anatomy that sex can be like a biology lesson, and for a lot of men they are so conditioned by porn that they expect a woman to fall into gasping orgasms at the sight of their penis, never mind what they do with it (or any other part of their anatomy).

A few pretty crap ones.... I've also had the micro dick experience, then there was the guy with long hair & beard but who inexplicably shaved every other part of his body - I think he must have been due a refresh as was covered in stubble, everywhere, and I ended up with stubble rash all over me! Finally the gorgeous guy who took me out in his sports car, wined and dined me and took me back to his. I fancied the pants off him, until he started meticulously getting undressed, folding and carefully putting away each item till he was left standing in a pair of pristine high waisted grandad y - fronts, into which he had tucked in his shirt..... the notion just went off me then...

In defence of the smaller penis I’ve had amazing sex with these where the owner has actually been interested in pleasuring a woman. It’s when they don’t work out how to work with what they’ve got (because they don’t care about their partner’s enjoyment for some reason I’ve never understood).