to dislike having showers with your husband/partner

[4Smalls]

Have never liked having showers with partners. This applies to husband (married many years) but also to previous boyfriends. I think the reasons are:

1. Shower is the one child-free, quiet, contemplative time in my day.
2. I have a lot to get through! Washing hair, conditioning, shaving underarms, etc.
3. One person always seems to have to stand in the cold while other is under the water. Not comfy even if switch back and forth.

So, my question is: AIBU or do some of you also dislike showers with partner? Just curious!

Its shit.
Something that only looks good and romantic in movies but reality is not as such.
Yanbu!

DH and I usually shower together. We like to wash each other. It seems lonely to be in the shower without him.

Fresh hell. I am reading fresh hell.

Really sure this isn’t a thing. Other than for sex.

We then wash ourselves, including our own arse cracks......It's a sensual experience, one of our love languages.

Beautiful, just beautiful.

You need a suitably large shower with handrails, which we have. Great for period sex.

We then wash ourselves, including our own arse cracks......It's a sensual experience, one of our love languages.

Presumably a love language spoken out of one's arse...

The only time I have done this was when we were camping and in a shower block. The kids were in there too so not sexy or pleasant but convenient way to get washed quickly and out.

Same here! The background dulcet tones of the kids screaming because they hated showers and also the unadjustable temperature of the shower being around 98 degrees celsius definitely did not make for any horniness!

I found shower sex to be quite a frightening experience! I really thought someone was going to end up with a broken leg or slipping over and bashing their head on something. Then there's the rest of it which means alternately standing their shivering. It looks exciting on tv but I didn't feel the reality lived up to the expectation!

I have nothing to add but just wanted to say thanks for making me laugh so much.

YANBU at all.

As some PP have remarked, it's just too darn slippery.
And I like my "me" time, too.
Sex standing up has just never done it for me.

How does that even work in reality? Blinking through the water pouring on your face, does no one else have head hair come out from the water pressure like spider balls? You would have to match pretty well height wise surely? I'm 5ft it just wouldn't work in any position. I like it so hot as well, a lukewarm shower makes me pretty miserable. Nice fantasy, pretty disappointing in reality.

You need a suitably large shower with handrails, which we have. Great for period sex.

All I can think of is that scene from Carrie now

Eww no.

A shower that leads to sex is bad enough, awkward, cold and pointless.
Having a shower together to wash each other is just bloody weird! I'm capable of washing myself thanks.
DP did ask me to wash his hair in the bath a couple of times. He was swiftly told to jog on. He was a bit weird like that when we first met. Also asked me several times to put toothpaste on his toothbrush for him WTF! That didn't happen either.

Also sex in the bath or jacuzzi...What's that all about? We tried it once in a jacuzzi. Was just painful for me.

Massive, double shower designed for shagging in the outdoor bathroom of a lovely hotel in the Maldives, yes.

Back home to my limescale caked, grotty corner shower in SE London, no.

Also asked me several times to put toothpaste on his toothbrush for him

Are you married to Prince Charles?

Shower sex is crap.
Shared washing is weird.

The best wank I ever had was in a jacuzzi. I was on my own and I had my knees either side of the underwater, water jet. I got my clitoris close to the most powerful water jet, it was fantastic.

(I've just sent MN into melt down.)

Yes, and we kept it going. Just like our marriage

Good grief. How many years of discomfort have you had?

I've been married 40 years. I can count the number of times we've had sex in a shower on my thumb. No way. Not comfortable.

The number of times you choose to have sex in the shower is not a measure of the strength of your marriage, or how often you have sex or anything else.

Of course, if that's what blows your skirt up then go f

Not over rated what so ever..
well I don't think

Me and my partner had a bath to start with candles, plenty of washing each other & touching. This followed with an erotic shower and me bent over. It carried on once we got out and into the bedroom and I can honestly say it was an immense night. 😁😁😁😁

I have a huge shower so it’s nice. However we don’t get much opportunities.

For non sexual reasons ? No
I wouldn’t shower with my husband that’s ridiculous

Have tried it a few times but it is awkward and cold at times. Plus I find it hard to come standing up, my legs just want to give way, so that's a disincentive.

How many years of discomfort have you had?

None. We don't have sex in the shower. It's a sensual experience but I'm not being understood, so think what you like.