To give MIL a big waxy cock for Christmas?

[FestiveSchlong]

My family don’t have a lot of money and I’m quite crafty so I do home made presents a lot of the time. This year I thought it would be a nice idea to make a little hamper of home-made luxuries like truffles, soaps and bath bombs, and scented candles.

We all love Game of Thrones, so I thought it would be cool to make white candles with a blood red centre, and then carve it to look like one of the weirwood trees. So I made a lot of red, cinnamon scented wax and poured it into Molds made out of bog roll tubes.

The results were a bit lumpen, but not awful, but then I started coating the red wax with the white and now they look like a load of big pink veiny willies. Do you think I can salvage them? Or should I just give as is and pretend they’re meant to be erotic candles? They smell really nice but look horrible.

[FestiveSchlong]

Update: I may have redeemed the Wankee Candles. What do you think?

[CryingMessFFS]

😂 they look amazing now! Not cock/meat slab like any more. Scary trees?

[cloudtree]

I'm a bit sad to see them go

[MyKingdomForBrie]

You're an absolute genius!!

[ElusiveButterfly]

They actually look really cool now

[CoffeeWithMyOxygen]

Can I just recap? You found a silicon minge in your garden. Instead of throwing it away, you decided to upcycle it as a temporary rock-substitute in a home-made water feature, for which you then constructed feet out of polymer clay?

I am CRYING with laughter at this!

[SantaBabycharly]

They look really ghoul now !

[SpamChaudFroid]

Brilliant, FestiveSchlong! (I see you didn't follow my "pop them in a cool oven" suggestion!) The 2 on each end look like leering sex pests and the one in the middle looks rather sad at their Sid James attitudes..

[TheFirstOHN]

They do look a lot better now. Half weirwood tree, half cylindrical zombie pumpkin.

[Kittykat93]

One of those candles looks a bit like the sorting hat from Harry potter now!

[delboysskinandblister]

or Dr Seuss

[KeepServingTheDrinks]

They look a bit halloween-y, but fabulous.

I preferred them the original way. But I guess they make better presents now.

You're very gifted, OP.

This thread's been very amusing!

[CrabbityRabbit]

Oh wow they look great now! 100% would be happy receiving them as gifts. All 3 togther. Don't split them up.

[SantaBabycharly]

Yes , you went to a lot of hubble, boil , and trouble , making those.
Terrifying Trio.

[joolshou]

Fab. Love it!!

[category12]

They still look a bit pants, sorry, OP. They're amusing tho.

[LucheroTena]

Don’t listen to category op, they’re fabulous. Keep them as a trio though

[Ireallywantmylifeback]

What an absolute gift this thread has been. OP you are a crafty genius.
I cried laughing at the minge water feature too. Bonus 🤣🤣🤣

[Loyaultemelie]

I'm disappointed at how professionally halloweenish they are now (although I'd still buy them!)

[SantaClauseMightWork]

Sorry to derail the thread but I am am speechless at spam’s very symmetrical, very pink vagina and the monstrous catheter coming out of it. What a depiction of the pain and sufferings of modern woman.

[Mydogsanasshole]

It’s like a colonoscopy on legs!! 🤣🤣

[GinGiminey]

Well everything was very amusing and then the six legged, cathetered vagina tipped me over the edge! 😂
Such a good thread, but has left me feeling jealous that I don’t get random sex toys thrown into my garden! 😆

[needtogetagrip]

Wankee candles 😂😂😂

[GinandGingerBeer]

They look like lard with angry faces now. Name it Lardattack.