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AIBU?

To ask where I can buy bigger condoms?

217 replies

Fighternotalover · 29/10/2018 21:38

Long story short, the pill is making me crazy. Nobody can stand to be around me because my moods are so bad! ... including myself! I can't use a lot of contraception due to severe migraines and don't want to use others for various reasons.

So we are left with condoms. Only problem is standard ones don't fit the boyfriend and neither do the 'xl' ones from standard brands. Only ones we've found that do are from theyfit/myone and at almost £7 for 6, I can't afford to be having sex! 😂

Can anyone think of any brand etc that I may have forgotten? Or am I just going to have to give up sex (definitely not risking another baby after an almost 11lb one earlier this year....definitely not considering that for a long time!).

Thanks x

OP posts:
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Ihopeyourcakeisshit · 30/10/2018 17:08

Baguette! How did you manage that?
I lived in fear of meeting a huge wanger, I'm not equipped.

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PaintingOwls · 30/10/2018 17:11

MySize on Lovehoney Halloween Biscuit

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MotherofPearl · 30/10/2018 19:24

He has a massive dick, you have a giant fanny, and you produce enormous babies. Have you considered moving to brobdingnag?



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MotherofPearl · 30/10/2018 19:25

Whoops, my  emojis vanished from my repost of Electric's extremely amusing remark!

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TheClitterati · 30/10/2018 19:28

£3.50 each surely? If he expects you to cover the whole cost I think you should seriously consider LTB 

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Dljlr · 30/10/2018 19:28

Sheep's bladder. Worked for the Romans.

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Welshmum16 · 30/10/2018 20:08

Can't help with condom advise as we gave up as DH has always said they don't fit,

But with the Pill can you go to doctors and ask for a different one, explain it's giving bad mood swings, there are lots of different types, I changed mine due to the sugar coating making me feel sick my SIL also changed her for other reasons so she was on a different type to me.

Worth asking doctors

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Dontfeellikeaskeleton · 30/10/2018 20:12

The coil is an option but they don't fit it in my town so would need dp to take time off work for me to have it fitted

^^
Which you don't have. Cos of all the shaggin

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BlackType · 30/10/2018 20:13

I'm now having flashbacks to sixth form common room and girls wearing condoms. Surely his dick isn't 5'6" long, with bumpy bits, OP?

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Schuyler · 30/10/2018 21:57

I rarely laugh out loud reading MN and sorry OP, some of th comments are very funny. I do hope you find a solution though.

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didyouseetheflaresinthesky · 30/10/2018 22:31

This thread is gold. I don't care if it's a troll, this is the class of troll I have come to expect from MN.

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TittyBoneGhoul · 30/10/2018 23:45

LTB

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aidelmaidel · 30/10/2018 23:51

@NOTthepinkranger no, the...is it a fairy godmother? the nice Disney lady and the mighty wall-mounted dong

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MistressDeeCee · 31/10/2018 01:07

😂😂😂 Oh get out if it

DP has a case of Biggus Dickus & he doesn't have to go hunting around for mega condoms. There's always an..ahem.."comfortable" brand to be found. Easy.

Try Skyns.

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BananasAreTheSourceOfEvil · 31/10/2018 01:40

Actually just laughed so hard at this thread that my fella woke up and asked what was up. I said ‘women on the internet talking about big willies’.

He looked confused so I told him he was dreaming and to go back to sleep.

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JanetLovesJason · 31/10/2018 01:56

Start shagging multiple times a day OP, so his massive cock gets your fandom in good shape for the next giant baby head coming on through.

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JanetLovesJason · 31/10/2018 01:56

Fanjo not fandom

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Kathik · 31/10/2018 02:35

I honestly hope this is a joke OP; You can literally stretch a regular sized condom to fit over your whole leg!

Sorry sweetie, but XL ones are a marketing ploy and your fella ain't all that special!

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mimibunz · 31/10/2018 03:36

I hate the word ‘girth’!

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brizzledrizzle · 31/10/2018 06:33

The men having penis fillers to boost their self-esteem www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-45735061
Op, maybe your dp has been going here.

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Fighternotalover · 31/10/2018 07:52

I can see most if You don't believe me haha. It is true! He isn't just saying it because he doesn't want to wear a condom, he doesn't want another baby right now either. He is the one that wants me to stop taking the pill because I'm not very nice to be around at the mo!

You can see when he puts a normal condom on that the bit that rolls down is too tight. I definitely wouldn't want that when doing the deed! Very uncomfortable! And the risk of the condom splitting is much greater.

No sexual health clinic where I live as in a very small town. Will get my friend to take me next week so she can look after the giant baby when I'm in.

Thank you for sensible suggestions, will try skyns.

Oh and no correlation between dick size and baby size. We are both over 6ft and baby is very long so probably to do with that! He's in 9-12 month clothes at only 7 months due to his height.

Thanks all.

OP posts:
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MistressDeeCee · 31/10/2018 08:06

DD1 was 8lb 8oz. DD2 was 10lb 2oz. They're in their 20s now & both around 5ft 3 ins tall. & petite. So big birth weight doesn't automatically = giant child

I think you're somehow starstruck by "wooooow he's got a big one" OP & that's why you're also relating this to other things.

Anyway as said, Skyns will do the job. If condom is tight then he's not putting it on correctly. You can blow up a condom like a balloon there's no way it doesn't fit him

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overagain · 31/10/2018 09:11

@Fighternotalover I both believe you and understand you. DH is 'of girth' and normal size just don't work, they break, roll down, strangle him. The XL are better (he prefers Trojan) but still not great. Thankfully the pill works well for me so no need to use them anymore but it really is an issue for some!

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overagain · 31/10/2018 09:13

And those thinking it's a stealth boast, it really isn't. When I first got with DH sex hurt, wasn't pleasant or fun. Blow jobs are almost impossible as I can't open my jaw wide enough and have grazed him with my teeth. Can't be nice for him.

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famishedpotato · 31/10/2018 09:27

We found that Skyn XL work - they're made of a different material to latex condoms and it seems to have more give in it.

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