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To ask where I can buy bigger condoms?

217 replies

Fighternotalover · 29/10/2018 21:38

Long story short, the pill is making me crazy. Nobody can stand to be around me because my moods are so bad! ... including myself! I can't use a lot of contraception due to severe migraines and don't want to use others for various reasons.

So we are left with condoms. Only problem is standard ones don't fit the boyfriend and neither do the 'xl' ones from standard brands. Only ones we've found that do are from theyfit/myone and at almost £7 for 6, I can't afford to be having sex! 😂

Can anyone think of any brand etc that I may have forgotten? Or am I just going to have to give up sex (definitely not risking another baby after an almost 11lb one earlier this year....definitely not considering that for a long time!).

Thanks x

OP posts:

tinatsarina · 30/10/2018 00:32

@TittyBoneGhoul the part about clumping it in the bath got me


NoTeaNoShadeNoPinkLemonade · 30/10/2018 00:32

magnum xl


tinatsarina · 30/10/2018 00:32

*flumping not clumping


KittensAndCake · 30/10/2018 00:46

Maybe ask for salami size
I’d imagine he fills the bath and flumps it in.
I love mn 


Mum2OneTeen · 30/10/2018 00:58

Stealth boast?


panago · 30/10/2018 01:09

I thought half term was over?!


FloydWasACat · 30/10/2018 01:55

t00dle00 you just made me crack up!!!


ratatatatouille · 30/10/2018 02:04

Penis bucket 😂😂😂

Oh how I’ve missed mumsnet!


KhaleesiTheDeadWalker · 30/10/2018 02:10 do large condoms at a decent price 


WereFox · 30/10/2018 02:42

My ex's condoms spontaneously rolled back off him and pinged away, yeah. Cock ring?


Aintnothingbutaheartache · 30/10/2018 02:51

I need to find smaller ones 😬


qumquat · 30/10/2018 03:24

I recommend Skyn XL.


hungryhippo90 · 30/10/2018 04:23



StripySocksAndDocs · 30/10/2018 04:45

I've another question for the OP (even though she, quite rudely, hasn't answered my question about if she wears roller skates all the time).

How come he doesn't know where to get
XXXL condoms from? Has his penis only recently grown many more inches? Is it becauss he's never had sex before? Could it be he doesnt care a woman may get pregnant (or an STI)?


malificent7 · 30/10/2018 05:55



ghostlygal · 30/10/2018 06:05

How about a plastic bag?


MsHopey · 30/10/2018 06:07

Some around half way down they won't roll without possibly damaging the condom forcing it to go further. And you can actually see it squeezing the poor sods cock. It's not nice for them. An ill-fitting condom is like us wearing ill-fitted bras and also why some guys don't like wearing them. Once fitted properly they enjoy wearing them.

And yes I know this is odd considering they can stretch to fit across a person's head. But I think that's because they are unrolled first and stretched a bit like a balloon.

^^ This.
It's the part that's still rolled up and you can't really do anything with that looks like it's squeezing the life out the cock.
I think it looks pretty uncomfortable and always a bit scary because it remind me of a too small pair of tights that don't want to stay up and will probably just roll back down with the slightest touch.
The bit that hasn't been unrolled is like an elastic band because there's no stretch in that bit. DH has worn them in times when I haven't been protected (after pregnancy and still getting long term protection sorted) but I don't envy him.


MsHopey · 30/10/2018 06:08

Bold fail. Sorry.


Fighternotalover · 30/10/2018 07:12

I'm back and yes my post was serious. I don't feel sorry for the people who don't know that one size fits all...they're probably getting it more than me haha.

No rollerskates.

No penis beaker or bath here.

The length isn't the issue.

Pp's who are saying about the bit that rolls down are correct, it is that bit that is too tight and uncomfortable for him and it is just like wearing a too small pair of tights that roll back down haha.

He hasn't only just realised that they don't fit. We've been together almost a decade and pre baby we just didn't use anything. Having a giant baby has put me off that idea for a while as I need time to recover from that!

The coil is an option but they don't fit it in my town so would need dp to take time off work for me to have it fitted.

Also £1 a go is quite a lot of money if you want it everyday!

Also, no stealth boast. Genuine question. Thanks for the serious replies. And thanks for the not serious, they have provided me with entertainment this morning! 😂

OP posts:

Worieddd · 30/10/2018 08:56

Big baby
Big penis
Shagging every day!



ShatnersWig · 30/10/2018 09:06

Do you only have sex with the lights off? if so, you may find he's using his arm.

If even standard XL ones don't fit, then he's probably missing out on making a fortune in porn.


GhouldaLovesLillies · 30/10/2018 09:10

siakcaci: OP you have now got me wondering if there is a direct link between birth weight and cock length

Only of OP's husband is Hagrid


LynetteScavo · 30/10/2018 09:26

I actually think £1 a go each day is bargain, as far as entertainment goes. Maybe cancel Sky and buy condoms instead.


Fatasfook · 30/10/2018 09:28

Use a bin bag


YoureAllABunchOfBastards · 30/10/2018 09:34

Please tell me the guy who took them back to the pharmacist didn't actually take used ones...

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