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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

People who are ALWAYS late

167 replies

Mammmoo · 04/08/2018 12:42

A small someone who manages to get places on time (& yes I have children) AIBU to get pissed off with people who are always late to meet me? I mean surely these people get to work/kids to school on time?

Today we have relations coming to visit. 90 min drive, we do the other way (a lot) and it's a painless journey, we've never encountered traffic issues yet they do...every time. Today I'm making lunch for 1, only now they won't be here until 2 so we can "go ahead and eat if we are hungry."
I know I should make provisions for their being late but everytime I think maybe this time they'll manage to be on time?
They're not the only people I know who do this and it makes me so cross!

OP posts:
Original poster
Mammmoo · 04/08/2018 12:44

Should say as someone, not a small someone! I'm not small!

OP posts:
Mookie81 · 04/08/2018 12:46

Unless it's a rare occasion and there's a valid reason it's rude and a lack of respect.

Harrykanesrightsock · 04/08/2018 12:47

My sister is like this so I always tell her a time an hour sooner than we want her. So lunch at 1. She would be told it will be on the table for 12 meaning she arrives at 1. Just when I want her.

MoreCoffeePlease123 · 04/08/2018 12:47

Yes, it’s ok once in a while but routinely is just rude.

LighthouseSouth · 04/08/2018 12:49

people who are regularly late have no consideration for your time....I have never known this to end well! So I don't deal with such people any more.

ClarkWGriswold · 04/08/2018 12:49

I can't stand late people. To me it says that they don't respect you or put any value on your time.

Bambamber · 04/08/2018 12:50

I am always late. Work, appointments, meals out, meeting friends and family, I need help to be on time. I have dyspraxia and have no sense of time. Something could take me half an hour and I think it's literally only been 5 minutes. If i do manage to be on time, I always bloody lose something which makes me run late. I'm not saying that's the case here, but sometimes it's not just because someone is rude

Original poster
Mammmoo · 04/08/2018 12:51

Glad I'm not the only one!

If they were friends I wouldn't bother but it's dh sis in law so I don't have much choice.

I may serve them burnt pizza at 2 though :-)

OP posts:
Starlighter · 04/08/2018 12:51

Yes! I hate it! It’s so rude, selfish and disrespectful.

We’re all late sometimes, but when it’s constant it’s so annoying.

I tend to give persistently late friends/family a different time now. I recently had a bbq. Told everyone it was at 1pm. Told my mum (regular offender!) it was at 12. She still turned up at 2pm!

billysboy · 04/08/2018 12:52

its bloody rude as they are saying their time is more important than yours

Original poster
Mammmoo · 04/08/2018 12:53

It's not just one person, its 2 adults and 2 teenagers. I hadn't thought of that aspect for individuals though.

OP posts:
Groovee · 04/08/2018 12:53

Dd is like this! Drives me up the wall. We have relatives who are always late too. Drives me potty x

Mercurial123 · 04/08/2018 12:53

I have a friend who is often one or two hours late when we meet up. I've told her it's rude and each time she is the one that gets offended.....

cloudyweewee · 04/08/2018 12:54

I posted recently on a similar thread and my view is that you shouldn't make allowances for people who are always late by giving them a time an hour later than you exepct to see them, because they will never change their behaviour.

bluetrampolines · 04/08/2018 12:55

Yeah make a false time.

Original poster
Mammmoo · 04/08/2018 12:56

They told us what time they would be here! So it's a case of them faffing about at home. I get this may happen with teenagers but they didn't need to leave until 11.30! And what kind of example has been set as their parents have been doing this since they were babies.

OP posts:
PrimalLass · 04/08/2018 12:57

Seriously, another one of these 'all late people are selfish and deserve no friends' threads?

PrimalLass · 04/08/2018 12:58

I can link you to the last one to save you some time and blood pressure.

Original poster
Mammmoo · 04/08/2018 13:01

I'm fairly new...didn't know previous threads or that people would be aggressive to you if you posted about a topic that had previously been posted about.

OP posts:
Sparklfairy · 04/08/2018 13:02

Don't worry mammmoo, primal is probably one of those who is chronically late Wink

Original poster
Mammmoo · 04/08/2018 13:02

Sorry that's not aimed at you, you're not being aggressive! I just read a bit of a previously thread

OP posts:
Botanicbaby · 04/08/2018 13:05

No one is being “aggressive” to you OP Hmm

Original poster
Mammmoo · 04/08/2018 13:06

Why not read all posts before commenting!! I apologised as that's not what I meant. I meant I looked at some previous threads as suggested and people were on there. English isn't my first language and I get confused getting my point across sometimes

OP posts:
NotAsGreenAsCabbageLooking · 04/08/2018 13:08

My sister is always always late, that in itself doesn’t bother me, what does bother me is that the rest of my family wait for her!!

If we’ve got a family meal in a restaurant booked for 1.00, I want to be ordering mine and my children’s food shortly afterwards. Not dealing with my (rightfully) hungry therefore grumpy kids for an hour or so because she couldn’t be bothered to show up.

If she wants to be consistently late that’s one thing, but everyone pandering to it with the view of ‘it wouldn’t be fair to start without her’ really winds me up.

The last time she did it, we ordered before she arrived. She got there before my food was out and so ordered hers (the same as mine). Then when mine came out she claimed it as hers and sat eating it while I waited... then consequently I ate on my own as the rest of my family had finished theirs 🙄

This is high on my list of irritants!! 😂

Rottweilers1 · 04/08/2018 13:09

It’s fucking rude and consistently being late shows a lack of respect to the person you’re meeting.

Been delayed for a three hour journey by an hour due to people fucking about and not getting their priorities straight so this resonates with me on a personal level right now haha.