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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want the double bed no the twin?

160 replies

DramaLamasunited18 · 16/07/2018 13:20

Long story short.
On an extended family holiday. Sharing with an in law and their child, DH and our two children.
The house has one double bedroom and two twins. All kids are between 8and 12.
Unlawful got there first and wanted the double bedroom for them and their child to share the bed and put me a DH in twins with our kids in the other twin.
Dh and I had to be a bit blunt in requesting that we share the double bed.
In law was a obviously put out.
WIBU?

OP posts:
kitkatsky · 16/07/2018 13:22

I'm surprised in law wanted to share a bed with their child. I hate (not) sleeping with mine. But they were there first so maybe a little unreasonable asking them to move tbh

Sleepyslops · 16/07/2018 13:26

I don't think it matters either way, but if it was me and one child then I would take the twin room and let the couple have the double.

Readyfortheschoolhols · 16/07/2018 13:28

Unless cf relative paid extra for first dibs on a room then the couple should have the double room surely?

DPotter · 16/07/2018 13:28

This does not bode for a fun holiday. Yes you were very unreasonable.

If you were that concerned about which bedroom you should have agreed things in advance or made sure you arrived first.

Given that you can't change the past you need to work hard at building a more friendly atmosphere or you will have ruined the holiday for everyone. As you have described the holiday is extended, you could suggested swapping rooms half way through.

MaxPepsi · 16/07/2018 13:29

Does the double have the en suite?

If so, yes yabu.

youknowwherethecityis · 16/07/2018 13:29

Seems selfish on the face of it. Who did all the sorting out and booking? How were the holiday costs split?

AlmostAJillSandwich · 16/07/2018 13:31

Yes, it is strange to expect a married couple to be separated in twin beds and have a single parent and child take the double. Unless inlaws child is very young and hasn't slept in a twin bed instead of a cot and is a safety concern, or has always co-slept.

If it is them simply preferring a double over a twin, they're being ridiculous, "I got here first!" is a childish reason to take the best room for them self when its more suitable for someone else.

crrrzy · 16/07/2018 13:33

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ for privacy reasons.

cornflakegirl · 16/07/2018 13:34

YANBU
If there were two doubles and they nabbed the nicer one, that would be fair enough.
If they wanted a double, they should have spoken up when booking so you could book somewhere else.

Anya278 · 16/07/2018 13:43

@MaxPepsi makes a good point. Normally the double comes with the en suite. Is this the case? How much each party is paying could also be important.

Original poster
DramaLamasunited18 · 16/07/2018 13:46

Extended as in more than just us for a long weekend.
Other houses involved. Booked by senior family member not in our house
Didn’t even occur to me when it was booked that the single adult and child would be anywhere other than one of the twin rooms.

We hardly made them move as nothing had been unpacked. Our kids used the same bathroom as us and they had the main one for themselves.

OP posts:
Original poster
DramaLamasunited18 · 16/07/2018 13:47

We paid more as there were 4 of us and 2 of them

OP posts:
IsTheRainEverComingBack · 16/07/2018 13:48

It’s odd, I would always assume a couple would share. Why did they want the double?

Flashinggreen · 16/07/2018 13:59

Sounds like they wanted the en suite then? YWNBU though.

mrsm43s · 16/07/2018 14:00

I dunno. I don't see that one set of two people is more entitled to the double (better) room than the other set of two people, presuming that both sets of two people felt they would be more comfortable in the double. So I would say it was first one there gets the double (and presumably the ensuite).

Whilst DH and I share a double at home, we've often slept in twins in hotels/holiday rentals. It's no big deal. I don't think that being a couple gives you any automatic entitlement to the best room.

Hawkie · 16/07/2018 14:04

You were unreasonable. If they sleep with the child so what, i think maybe you just wanted the double and the en suite.

They arrived first, they get first dibs if not pre sorted.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 16/07/2018 14:05

You sound sex-mad OP and very unreasonable. Perhaps it's the heat?

diddl · 16/07/2018 14:05

We have 2 single mattresses in one frame so would probably prefer the twin room.

As long as sex & sleep are both possible!

fruitbrewhaha · 16/07/2018 14:05

It was unexpected that they would want the double bed. But really turning up and being "blunt" sounds like you were rude. Could you not just sleep in twin beds for a week. I couldn't really get that het up about it. Especially in this heat, you get a little bed all to yourself.

RedBallpointPens · 16/07/2018 14:06

I agree with the previous poster - being in a couple doesn't entitle you to be best bedroom and the en suite. If there were more of you - did you pay more per person? Given the set up I'd assume you paid twice as much as the in law (so the same price per person) and so were all equally entitled to the double bedroom.

Insisting that they moved for no good reason was very unreasonable.

lalalalyra · 16/07/2018 14:09

Our kids used the same bathroom as us and they had the main one for themselves.

That sounds like one has an en-suite and one doesn't. That wouldn't automatically go to a couple imo - if you've all paid the same then you should have equal dibs on having the convenience of that.

MyRelationshipIsWeird · 16/07/2018 14:10

It seems odd that the relative thought they and their child should have the double bed rather than a couple, but I'd secretly be a bit pleased as I sleep better without my DP next to me! We have a double bed each Blush

Having shared a house with family before (never again!) I must admit, we ended up with the biggest room as we had to put a camp bed in it for one of our DCs and gave the child free couple the single beds downstairs so they didn't get woken by our rowdy kids.

I don't know if they might have preferred to be upstairs with the other adults, but there were also babies and it would have meant putting the other children (age 6/7) downstairs on their own, so just made sense. I'm sure they had their reasons, whether the proximity of rooms to each other/bathrooms etc but don't let it ruin your holiday.

worstmovieever · 16/07/2018 14:11

I love twin beds on holiday. Still get sex but don't get kicked in the shins all night by my constantly moving dh Grin

raspberrysplit · 16/07/2018 14:18

we paid more as there were 4 of us and 2 of them
I should bloody hope you did pay more. But did you pay more per person?
If not, YABU.

youknowwherethecityis · 16/07/2018 14:20

The OP is unreasonable to want to share a bed with their DH on holiday?!

I would have thought it would be obvious that the double would go to the couple as well.

I think it's very selfish of them to turn up and choose the only double bedroom.

The OP hasn't said whether the double room was en-suite or not, but I don't see why that matters. Maybe I'm not fully understanding why an en-suite would be so important Confused