To want the double bed no the twin?

[DramaLamasunited18]

Long story short.
On an extended family holiday. Sharing with an in law and their child, DH and our two children.
The house has one double bedroom and two twins. All kids are between 8and 12.
Unlawful got there first and wanted the double bedroom for them and their child to share the bed and put me a DH in twins with our kids in the other twin.
Dh and I had to be a bit blunt in requesting that we share the double bed.
In law was a obviously put out.
WIBU?

You don’t say anything but you just want to creep off and cry about how you’re not the person you used to be because people disrespect you as lesser no matter how much they say they don’t they prove it with stuff like that.

@Fenwickdream I'm sorry you feel that way Have you ever actually told your friends and family how you feel? I'm sure if they're true friends or decent family they'd want to know and help if they can.

I probably have here or there if things have really pissed me off and it’s probably made a difference for about a week. It’s not people being mean, it’s just an autopilot mentality of “this is how we always do it”
It’s very hard to explain unless you are single/ although actually a never found this as just single it’s only as a “single parent”. It’s just easier to do everything on your own in the end. It’s like you lose all of your bargaining power of what time you go, what you eat, where you sleep etc etc etc.......for any social occasion.
I guess it’s for another thread if I ever get round to it but it does exist and it is shit and it’s part of the reason that single people/ parents just end up withdrawing away from everyone.
I love my friends and family, they’re not bad people but they are on autopilot about making their day, Holiday, life as great to suit THEM as possible because that’s what families do I suppose, that’s their agenda so it’s much better and easier to be on your own than to bend round all of this. I could give a million examples but it’s a different topic I suppose.
Incidentally if I were the mum and child in that situation I’d of taken the single room. I’m no drama queen and I’d of just felt lucky to get an actual room with the correct amount of beds in but equally I’d of never asked anyone to move either.

Green why does your son need to be in your bed

Yes Fenwick it must be very hard and you are probably right about the withdrawal aspect.

I still think becoming an adult is a rite of passage and they are higher up on pecking order

When I first read the thread I thought that yes of course the couple should have the double and if I’d been there first as part of a couple I’d have gone for the double. But I’ve changed by mind because of the bathrooms. I don’t think they were totally unreasonable to have the ensuite with the rest of you sharing the family bathroom. Basically I’m sitting on the fence but you were probably a bit mean to turf them out once they got there first and picked first. If you ever repeat this then discuss bedroom preferences before you book.

Adults are higher up the pecking order than adults to a certain extent. Let’s say they get a 5/10 for decisions and adults get a 10/10. So out of no choice of my own I cannot possibly match your 20 strong points of the decision making process. I’m always stuck on 15. So I get no say in anything, I am now on the same level as my child.
Like my family and friends you probably say to your family member or friend that’s a single parent. “Don’t be silly, come with us, we love your company, you won’t be left out, it will just be the more the merrier etc etc.”
But know that when they give you an excuse and you walk off mumbling about how they are excluding themselves from society and it’ll do them no good etc.

That’s why they have made up an excuse. Because they’re the equivalent of a child now ☹️

I agree with you, Fenwick. The only way to make it fair really is treat a couple as 'one' party when it comes to rooms/voting. Some couples certainly do this when it comes to buying rounds or splitting taxi fares... sauce for the goose and all that.

Most people inherently know what's fair... some of those really make the effort to apply that knowledge even if it doesn't work out in their absolute favour.

A couple is NOT more important or worthy than a single adult and you'd have to be a bit of twat to think otherwise and put somebody else in detriment because of that misapprehension.

Woodhill, special needs and disabilities, we have shared a single bed before and pushed twins together, I’ve even slept on the floor next to a single bed holding his hand when the double beds were taken. En suite same reasons, health problems and stuff.
On every family holiday the couples get double rooms and my son and I get twin or sofas despite me paying for 2 and everyone else paying for themselves, when my son is making lots of noise or panicking in the bathroom they have a go at me so I end up sleeping on the floor and trying to clean my ds with baby wipes and keep him calm meaning I spend 24/7 reading/playing/cleaning/calming ds and being told off by the adults while they all enjoy themselves.
Wow bit of resentment I didn’t know I had there, sorry!

As they asked, you are entitled to state your preference. I need my space if I have to holiday with family, so I always checklist what room is going to be ours.

A couple is NOT more important or worthy than a single adult and you'd have to be a bit of twat to think otherwise

But the OP clearly thinks that she is more important than her sister-in-law because the OP is part of a couple.

I'm with Fenwick on this. (Long time single person)

Fenwick you are spot on with your 15% point.