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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Husband called me a name

181 replies

mum19821985 · 06/05/2017 14:44

Not just any name...the big "see you next Tuesday" I am so angry at him. Back story, DH had been up all night with diarrhea and was feeling pretty awful. I had my driving test that morning so had to get kids ready for school etc. Dh took kids to school and came home to look after our baby. I was sitting in an arm chair by the window watching out for my driving instructor. Dh said he needed to sit by the window, I said he can in 5 minutes when I leave for my test. He called me selfish and said he knew he wasn't well. We argued but eventually I moved. He said I was a nasty and horrible person. I said how could he say that 5 minutes before my test. He kept saying how horrible treat him and how nasty I am. We had an awful row, I shouted that it would be his fault if I failed. I became more stressed and told him I hated him. He said - what did you say? I said it again. He then called me the c word. I swore at him and left without saying anything. Dh has since apologised many times but still protests that my saying I hate him was much worse. I disagree and can't forget that horrible word.

OP posts:
BumWad · 06/05/2017 14:46

I think you need to get over it.

How was your test?

sonlypuppyfat · 06/05/2017 14:47

Did you pass your test

Instasista · 06/05/2017 14:47

Sounds like something and nothing. Saying you hate someone is in the same ballpark as calling them a cunt. Some people use cunt a lot (me)

How was the test?

SaorAlbaGuBrath · 06/05/2017 14:48

Telling him you hated him was as bad IMO.

MaisyPops · 06/05/2017 14:48

I hate that word. It's awful.

It does sound like you were both slinging rubbish back and forth. You're stressed about your test etc and he's poorly. You're both feeling crap.
I would both sit down calmly to talk and move on.

Justmadeperfectflapjacks · 06/05/2017 14:48

Does he want you to fail maybe?

Crunchymum · 06/05/2017 14:48

School on a Saturday? Where are you?

Runningissimple · 06/05/2017 14:49

6 of 1 half a dozen of the other. Neither of you comes out looking particularly great. You sound a bit like my teenage kids getting a strop on. I'd move on....

user1471545174 · 06/05/2017 14:50

You were both at a low. I'd try to make up and disregard it this time. And what flapjacks said.

JustAKitten · 06/05/2017 14:52

Sounds like you were both being unreasonable. Apologise to each other.

gamerchick · 06/05/2017 14:53

School on a Saturday? Where are you?

The OP didn't say this happened today.

Sounds like it was just one of those moments where both of you were tense.

How did your test go?

Chloe84 · 06/05/2017 14:53

Sounds like the twat was looking for an argument.

The living room is not a fucking car that he needs a window seat.

Is he usually an abusive shit?

Instasista · 06/05/2017 14:54

Assume it happened yesterday since driving test usually during weekdays also. Although many private schools have Saturday lessons

StillDrivingMeBonkers · 06/05/2017 14:55

You sound really abusive. Would it have hurt you to move for someone who is ill?

Frankly you need to grow up.

Instasista · 06/05/2017 14:56

Well, really abusive is over egging it somewhat 😭

gamerchick · 06/05/2017 14:58

Christ it'll be LTBs all over the place in a minute Confused

Mulberry72 · 06/05/2017 14:59

Sorry, but you sound just as bad as each other!

StillDrivingMeBonkers · 06/05/2017 15:00

If I'd been up all night shitting through the eye of a needle, told to take the kids to school, and then told to move when I sat down, it's quite possible that person would now be residing under my patio.

Crunchymum · 06/05/2017 15:00

I thought she said 'this morning' (not 'that morning') Blush

WyfOfBathe · 06/05/2017 15:01

You said you hated him, twice. He swore at you, and then you swore at him. As a pp said, it's 6 of one half a dozen of the other.

PietariKontio · 06/05/2017 15:01

Well it all depends on you as individuals. My wife hates that word, so it's probs the worst thing I could call, I wouldn't mind any swear word, but would be really upset if she said she hated me.

You were both fragile, he was feeling shit, you were worried, you both went too far in a silly row; he's apologised, you should too and the forget about it.

TinselTwins · 06/05/2017 15:01

Sounds like you werent sympathetic to him being ill, that is a bigger deal breaker to me than some types of mild infidelity! IMO you really see the person you're with when you're ill and vulnerable. I'ld be LingTOP!

DonaldStott · 06/05/2017 15:01

What's so special about the window seat?

Is it a magic armchair that would cure him of the shits?

Mummyoflittledragon · 06/05/2017 15:01

He was ill, you were stressed. It happens. The main thing is he apologised. Did you?

Branleuse · 06/05/2017 15:02

telling him you hate him is worse than being called a cunt imo. It sounds like you just had a row, tensions were high. Try and forget it

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