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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Husband called me a name

181 replies

mum19821985 · 06/05/2017 14:44

Not just any name...the big "see you next Tuesday" I am so angry at him. Back story, DH had been up all night with diarrhea and was feeling pretty awful. I had my driving test that morning so had to get kids ready for school etc. Dh took kids to school and came home to look after our baby. I was sitting in an arm chair by the window watching out for my driving instructor. Dh said he needed to sit by the window, I said he can in 5 minutes when I leave for my test. He called me selfish and said he knew he wasn't well. We argued but eventually I moved. He said I was a nasty and horrible person. I said how could he say that 5 minutes before my test. He kept saying how horrible treat him and how nasty I am. We had an awful row, I shouted that it would be his fault if I failed. I became more stressed and told him I hated him. He said - what did you say? I said it again. He then called me the c word. I swore at him and left without saying anything. Dh has since apologised many times but still protests that my saying I hate him was much worse. I disagree and can't forget that horrible word.

OP posts:
SheldonsSpot · 06/05/2017 15:02

He's been up all night ill and took the kids to school.

The least you could have down was let him sit down by the window.

You were nasty to him.

tshirtsuntan · 06/05/2017 15:03

Hide the toilet paper?

Chloe84 · 06/05/2017 15:03

I'd been up all night shitting through the eye of a needle, told to take the kids to school, and then told to move when I sat down, it's quite possible that person would now be residing under my patio.

still it was the H that asked OP to move from her seat.

StillDrivingMeBonkers · 06/05/2017 15:03

What's so special about the window seat?

Apparently it makes See You Next Tuesdays pass their driving test

NavyandWhite · 06/05/2017 15:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mum19821985 · 06/05/2017 15:05

It didn't happen today lol. This was a few days ago. I failed. :-( I drove very well but stopped at out of order traffic lights and failed! Boo! I'm rebooking test soon! We were both horribly stressed. I haven't apologised to him for what I said yet.

OP posts:
MamaHanji · 06/05/2017 15:05

It's a nasty word to call someone but I think you gave as good as you got. He apologised and you should too.

How did you test go?

TheMonkeyandthePlywoodViolin · 06/05/2017 15:06

It sounds like..an argument. Make up and move on

MyKingdomForBrie · 06/05/2017 15:06

You said you hated him and you're surprised he swore at you? He was seriously unwell but up taking the kids to school and looking after the baby and you hate him because he didn't get out of the chair you wanted?

I'm amazed he's apologised many times, frankly sounds like you treat him like shit and he's scared of you, why else would someone apologise for being treated so badly.

His fault if you fail? Grow the fuck up. Jesus.

TinselTwins · 06/05/2017 15:06

it was the H that asked OP to move from her seat

He has a tummy upset, it makes sense to want to sit next to fresh air if you're nauseous and have to do kid duty while feeling awful I'ld have offered to cancel my test if OH was that ill, not least cause I wouldn't want kids to catch it but whatever

However the OP is being ridiculous that she had to see her driving instructor arrive? why? could she not wait to hear a beep or a door bell or ask the OH to let her know when he's there

MamaHanji · 06/05/2017 15:06

Oh sorry just seen the update. Sorry about your test! I'm so nervous to be taking mine soon!

NightWanderer · 06/05/2017 15:06

Do you hate him though? Or just lashing out?

user1491572121 · 06/05/2017 15:06

The word is cunt. It doesn't have magical properties.

It's just an old word for fanny, or vagina or vulva or whatever and I know the vulva is not the same as the vagina...but I"m not sure which part cunt refers to.

I RESENT people saying cunt is the WORST WORD IN THE WORLD.

It's not. It's an old word for MY sexual organ. Why is it OUR cunt that branded unspeakable and not the male cock?

Remove the weight from the word OP. It's just a word.

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 06/05/2017 15:07

I can't ever imagine telling my DH I hated him, especially if he was ill. Bit if a cunty thing to do.

NavyandWhite · 06/05/2017 15:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TinselTwins · 06/05/2017 15:07

It didn't happen today lol. This was a few days ago. I failed. :-( I drove very well but stopped at out of order traffic lights and failed! Boo! I'm rebooking test soon! We were both horribly stressed. I haven't apologised to him for what I said yet

You sound incredibly self obsessed

mum19821985 · 06/05/2017 15:07

Tshirt - that's funny but could get messy and I dread to think what he would use instead 😂

OP posts:
ChicRock · 06/05/2017 15:08

Well your behaviour does sound cuntish, so if the cap fits.

swinkle · 06/05/2017 15:09

Telling him it's his fault if you fail the test and saying you hate him... you sound really childish and nasty. Are you usually nasty to him if that's what he accused you of? And though I don't get why he had to sit in that particular chair, why couldn't you let him sit down, surely you'd still be able to see out of the window? He shouldn't have called you a cunt, but from what you've said about your part of it you sound about as bad if not a little worse.

tshirtsuntan · 06/05/2017 15:09

Shame he can't use your L plates (yet) Grin

MargotLovedTom1 · 06/05/2017 15:09

He said you treat him horribly and you're a nasty person. You told him you hate him and he replied you're a cunt. He's apologised many times over and you are still yet to aplogise. I think you're more in the wrong, tbh.

roarityroar · 06/05/2017 15:09

You're in the wrong.

It's just a word.

Get over yourself and grow up. It's a sodding word.

mum19821985 · 06/05/2017 15:09

Nightwanderer- I don't hate him. It was said out of anger

OP posts:
SemiNormal · 06/05/2017 15:10

Is this a reverse? Hmm
If someone I loved told me they hate me it would hurt me much more than being called cunt. He is apologising, you still haven't and blame him for failing your test. I think you need to grow up.

Anonym0us · 06/05/2017 15:10

If DH ever used the c word or even the f word towards me I would never want to have sex with him again so I guess that would be it. I hate that c word in particular. Being ill is no excuse for sinking to that level. However, saying you hate him twice is not something he's likely to get over in a hurry either. Sorry I can't be more positive about this.

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