To think it's not just me who doesn't like being stared at while partially dressed?

[lifeofsiam]

Dh and I were in what is supposed to be an over-14's only sauna/spa bath area.

A boy who looked significantly younger (about 12) sat on the edge of the jacuzzi steps staring at us the entire time. His mother and elder sibling stayed in the steam room, leaving him outside.

In the changing rooms, I spoke politely to the mother, saying she may not have seen the sign saying it is over -14's only, and also her son had stared at us the entire time, making us feel uncomfortable.

She became angry with me, said the boy was almost 14 and autistic- which is why he was staring.

Ok, we weren't to know that, and she was clearly very stressed.

She then muttered 'there's always one.'

I asked 'always one what ?'

'Always one who is uncomfortable being stared at.'

I didn't respond- I didn't want to argue with or antagonise another mother with a disabled child - but afterwards I thought how it's not just me who would feel uncomfortable and a lot of people, especially women and teenage girls wouldn't feel comfortable in those circumstances, either? And that I'm not 'only one' in that case?

However that poster did have a disabled child (even though she wasn't disabled herself) like spotty.

Still it's not really on to sneer at people who are disabled and call them disablist just because they disagree with you and are looking at a situation from a different perspective.

Not at all giraffe - that is total rubbish and as I have said there are varying degrees - now keep arguing with yourselves and change my disabled 16 year old daughter who is incontinent, has no sense of danger and needs total 24 hour care but Is the same level of disability as other on this thread who can argue on this thread and debate on ability as clearly disability levels must alone the same

Enjoy your sleep as I'll be up
Every 2 hours with my ( all as able ) disabled child to prevent her injuring herself) as my high functions asd son sleeps significantly better.

YES SPOTTY IT BLOODY IS HENCE THE CARER

You should be absolutely disgusted in yourself.

Well Spotty if it makes you feel any better you've cause another disabled person to harm themselves just because I'm not as disabled as your DC and apparently that means I'm in the firing line.

Yes that was the one Scarf but then that thread was deleted for being TAAT.

We posted on the thread in site stuff before it was deleted and then she came back claiming she wasn't talking about us. However seeing as it was only me, you and another poster who is disabled who were disagreeing with her on the first thread then who else could she be talking about?

I feel for her as she had a disabled child which I'm sure is stressful for her but I don't get why she felt the need to sneer at other disabled people and have a go at them just because they disagreed with her?

I shouldn't have to give details of how bad my disability is just to "prove" that I'm disabled enough to not have to cope with a situation.

All you've done is put words in my mouth and dismiss me. I have never ever claimed to be low functioning, I said I was in the middle but apparently that's not acceptable to you. I have never said I am comparable to your severely disabled DC maybe you should remember the people you speak to online are real people.

Can I just point out that autism and learning disabilities are different things. A person can have one or both. You cannot say an autistic person is"high functioning" (I hate functioning criteria so fake) because they do not have a learning disability. The functioning aspects of autism relate to autism. The functioning aspects of a learning disability relate to learning disability. To suggest someone experience of one condition can be based on the comorbidity of another is wrong.

Can't remember which poster had said low functioning was about learning disability sorry. My post aimed at them.

Newspaper

Do you have anything that helps calm you when you're upset?

For me it's watching my favourite tv shows on repeat. So that tends to mean the X Files

Do you have anything like that you can do?

I'm just really confused as to why she is saying I've said all this stuff that I haven't said

Yeah she had it loads better - surgery none stop for 3 years. Self harming daily, and wheelchair reliant plus hearing impairment, urology issues, global developmental delay & significant sleep issues.... God she's soo lucky.

You should all be ashamed

I think that was spotty, bloop.

She was implying that newspaper couldn't be that bad because she can post on MN.

Maybe Scarf

Thanks for the flowers guys I have woken DP up to assist me rather sheepishly and he's going to support me til I manage some sleep, Toads I think headphones in and Theta waves playing is a good starting point... And stroking the cat

Bloop I agree with you,maybe that's why the PPs posts are confusing me so much

I'm just really confused as to why she is saying I've said all this stuff that I haven't said

I don't really know what to say really.

Spotty actually you should be ashamed for causing self harm.

Which yes, I unfortunately do daily. Even if in your mind I'm very high functioning and skipping round throwing my ASD everywhere you are very wrong.

Yes it's something about cat fur and the repetitive motion that I find very stablising. It's a pleasant texture in amongst a world of horrid feelings