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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want to breast feed?

551 replies

LouBlue1507 · 13/05/2016 07:41

I'm currently 31 weeks pregnant and have decided I'm going to bottle feed my baby. Shock

I know breast is best but the thought of breast feeding really grosses me out and makes me feel sick. It's not something I will feel comfortable doing either.

Not only that but I don't want my baby stuck on my chest all the time.

Before I get flamed, I have nothing against women who choose to breastfeed, I have no problem seeing it, Just the thought of me doing it myself grosses me out.

Are there any other mums to be that feel the same or similar? x

OP posts:
NeedACleverNN · 13/05/2016 07:44

If you don't want to, don't.

Simple as that

SmallBee · 13/05/2016 07:45

YANBU. Its your choice either way. Don't let anyone feel bad for how you feed your baby.

Fwiw though I felt exactly the same as you did, down to the wording you've used, and I ended up breastfeeding for a year! We did mixed feeding but I didn't ever think I would do that.
But only because it was really easy for me (so sorry to everyone who struggles and perseveres!) if it had been hard I would have quit.

glueandstick · 13/05/2016 07:46

Your body, your choice. That's all there is to it.

x2boys · 13/05/2016 07:47

Yanbu I didn't breast feed either as long as mother and baby are happy everything's fine .

metimeisforwimps · 13/05/2016 07:48

I know many who would love to have breastfed but can't. It seems a shame not to do what's best for your child because of your perception of what it will be like. Would you consider giving the baby the first milk at least? This would help its immune system and also give you the chance to see if it's as bad as you think. Either way, best of luck with everything. I'm sure you are not alone in feeling this way.

Lunar1 · 13/05/2016 07:48

YANBU, I felt exactly the same when I was pregnant. I would keep an open mind as you may feel differently when your baby is here. I ended up breastfeeding both of mine as the first was really easy.

GrumpyMcGrumpyFace · 13/05/2016 07:49

if you don't want to then don't. However I don't understand why it would gross you out? It's what breasts are for. Maybe you need to explore that a little.

albertcampionscat · 13/05/2016 07:49

No. Your choice entirely. Having said that, I had a complete 180 when DS1 was born & suddenly really really wanted to. Glad I did, not because there is anything at alk wrong with formula, but because it made life a lot easier.

soundsystem · 13/05/2016 07:49

I sense I'm going to be in a minority here but I'm going to get in quick and say YANBU. Your body, your choice. It really is that simple! You don't have to justify it to anyone.

Good luck with the baby.

PlumPurple · 13/05/2016 07:50

YANBU about your choice but YABU about thinking it's gross. I assume you've made an informed decision and looked into the benefits and risks of breastmilk. What about pumping or donor milk?

Mishaps · 13/05/2016 07:50

It is of course your choice. The idea of a natural function "grossing you out" is sad though - and inexplicable. I am sure if you gave it a go you like Smallbe you might change your mind. But it is your mind and your choice. TBH I find it hard to imagine NOT doing what I knew was best for my baby - I do find that puzzling. But each to his own.

Sparklingbrook · 13/05/2016 07:51

YANBU. But v brave to start an AIBU thread about it. Be prepared to have lots of links and swathes of text as to why breast is best.

Gileswithachainsaw · 13/05/2016 07:51

Yanbu.

there's a choice and you made it. perfectly fine and who gives a shit what people think anyway. they cab bf their own.if they feel that strongly. bottle person here. best decision I ever made...

wigglesrock · 13/05/2016 07:51

I formula fed all three of mine from birth - no one flamed me, well not in real life anyway. I've found that apart from the Internet no one is really that interested in how you feed your child.

UmbongoUnchained · 13/05/2016 07:52

I felt the same OP. I did it for 10 minutes and that was it never again. I absolutely hated it.

DixieNormas · 13/05/2016 07:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BeStrongAndCourageous · 13/05/2016 07:54

A friend of mine thought exactly the same way - till her baby came out and latched on almost immediately. Actually she still found it "gross" but loved him so much she couldn't imagine denying him something he wanted so badly.

Personally I think there are loads of gross things about having babies and children, but breastfeeding isn't one of them.

frikadela01 · 13/05/2016 07:54

Yanbu. Neither of my sister breastfed my 4 neices and nephews for much the same reason as you've given. Aren't we lucky to live in a society where we can actually make this choice. Don't let anyone make you feel bad, it's just as legitimate a choice as breastfeeding.

whatamess0815 · 13/05/2016 07:56

YANBU for wanting to FF.yet your reasoning is. there is nothing remotely gross about BF. what a childish statement Confused

BertrandRussell · 13/05/2016 07:56

Fine not to if you don't want to.

But I do think that you need to be prepared for a lot of much grosser things than breast feeding. And the idea making you feel sick is pretty extreme.

Just a word of warning- you might be wise not to say things like that in real life.

Original poster
LouBlue1507 · 13/05/2016 07:56

It's good to hear I'm not the only one!

Of course I know why breast is best and all the health benefits. I'm not being ignorant.

I wish I knew why it grosses me out and to change it but I can't, it's a feeling that I can't control.

Maybe I'll change my mind once baby is here who knows!

OP posts:
Claraoswald36 · 13/05/2016 07:57

Felt exactly the same and hated being co erced. Yanbu though you might feel differently. I did a ebf the dds for 12 and 19 months. But you might not feel differently and that's equally acceptable.
Make sure you know the preparation rules re ff and all will be well.

SparklesandBangs · 13/05/2016 07:58

YANBU and neither is your reason, as people are always saying - it's your body so your choice.

Mine were FF from birth, never felt the inclination to breastfeed and always knew I would be going back to work within 8 weeks. Both have turned out fine and are now late teens/young adult

I do feel that the pressure to BF is more know but that might be because MN etc didn't exist then!

EatShitDerek · 13/05/2016 07:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AndYourBirdCanSing · 13/05/2016 07:59

NO, YANBU. At all.

Mishaps there are lots of things that parents don't do that is deemed 'best'. A woman deciding what she does with her body is not 'puzzling'.