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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think they should have had lunch

153 replies

Cutecat78 · 27/12/2015 19:36

Drove a 5 hour round trip today to collect DSDs.

Collected them at 2pm, we were a little late as the traffic was horrendous.

Turns out they hadn't had lunch. OH texted her to say how come they haven't eaten, she said most parents provide snacks for the car (I do provide a meal first and then a packed lunch for the journey when they leave from here), we pointed out we won't be home till at least 5 as I am driving and not unable to cook at the same time so dinner will not be at 5 as we arrive home!!

AIBU to think she should feed them lunch before they leave?

OP posts:
Original poster
Cutecat78 · 27/12/2015 19:37

Not able.....

OP posts:
limon · 27/12/2015 19:38

Yes she should. But as she didn't you should have stopped to get something for them.

NerrSnerr · 27/12/2015 19:39

They should have done, but I would have stopped on the way for something. What time were you due to arrive?

Original poster
Cutecat78 · 27/12/2015 19:40

A) we are skint paying for petrol etc and did not expect to have to buy a load of overpriced sandwiches - we also wanted to get through the traffic and get home.

B) I did not say we didn't stop.

OP posts:
WipsGlitter · 27/12/2015 19:41

How old are they? Can you not stop at a service station?

Pick your battles...

Original poster
Cutecat78 · 27/12/2015 19:41

1.30 and we texted and 12.30 saying we would be late.

OP posts:
BuggerLumpsAnnoyed · 27/12/2015 19:42

Maybe time just got away from her? How late were you? Unless you are concerned about a serious issue of neglect, ie, refusing to feed the children and them being under nourished, than I think, while its a bit annoying, if it's not a regular thing than YABU and a bit nitpicky.

MackerelOfFact · 27/12/2015 19:42

You don't say how old they are, but most children over the age of about 5 will be fine to skip lunch if they have had breakfast, especially around Christmas when they'll have been stuffing themselves with treats for three days solid.

If they were really starving, service stations sell food!

Original poster
Cutecat78 · 27/12/2015 19:44

If I am going to drive for 5 hours to collect her children the least she can do is ensure they are fed for the bloody journey.

OP posts:
OryxNotCrake · 27/12/2015 19:49

Well, it's a bit annoying but there must have been plenty of places to get food on a 5 hour journey. I wouldn't stew over it.

errorofjudgement · 27/12/2015 19:51

What time were you supposed to pick the girls up?
If it was after 1, then I would expect they would have eaten.
If between 12 and 1, then there was probably an expectation you would buy them lunch.
To be fair if it's a 5 hour trip, did you not want to stop at least for a coffee?

Crispbutty · 27/12/2015 19:52

5 hours is the round trip. Surely you could have stopped at a shop for a bag of crisps or something on the 2.5hr journey back, but they wouldn't have starved anyway.

Trills · 27/12/2015 19:53

If you are in charge of children until 1:30pm, you should feed them lunch.

If you are picking children up at 1:30pm, you should expect them to have had lunch.

Gavel.

MelanieCheeks · 27/12/2015 19:54

Bit of an overreaction on your part, I'd say. Is there more to this story?

idiuntno57 · 27/12/2015 19:56

You are obviously looking for a vehement SWBU but actually YABBUU.

Lunchtime can vary from family to family so I would have come loaded with snacks just in case. Unlikely they would be wasted either way.

AliceInUnderpants · 27/12/2015 19:56

Yes they should have eaten before 2pm.

But you lost any high ground the minute you referred to them as "her children" in that tone.

TTTatty · 27/12/2015 19:57

Ha, you are of course not unreasonable to expect them to have had their lunch but this is mn and on here the mother is always right! You should have been on time, had snacks ready, stopped for a service station lunch and just be grateful you are allowed to have the children at all. Or in the real world, yes of course the mother should have fed them and if she didn't think she would need to but then you ran late she should have rustled something up for them, you know, to just be nice and not send the children of hungry.

yzme · 27/12/2015 20:01

I would of expected them to be fed, however as they weren't I would of grabbed something to keep them going if they were complaining they were hungry.

'her children' what a lovely attitude!

Enjolrass · 27/12/2015 20:02

Yanbu but this made me Shock

If I am going to drive for 5 hours to collect her children the least she can do is ensure they are fed for the bloody journey.

You drive to pick up your DPs kids!

You aren't doing her a favour your are doing him a favour

WilburIsSomePig · 27/12/2015 20:03

Of course they should have eaten, that's really not fair on the children.

HPsauciness · 27/12/2015 20:05

We eat breakfast very late in the hols, about 10/11 so lunch at 2/3 would be good for us. I would always bring even just some cereal bars and some fruit and water, that way they can always keep going on those. Or I would go into petrol station- it's a £5 for a couple of sandwiches, which if you are paying for 5 hours of petrol is not that much, is it?

Penfold007 · 27/12/2015 20:05

Yes they should have had some lunch but there is obviously a back story. In future pack a in car picnic.

Prometheus · 27/12/2015 20:07

So your OH can't drive to pick up his kids, nor can can he cook dinner so it would be on the table at 5pm?

abbsismyhero · 27/12/2015 20:09

well they technically are her children so why didn't she feed them?

if someone is collecting my children at 1.30 i always ask do you want them feeding or are you taking them to maccies? as i would assume anyone driving for five hours will need a break

Evabeaversprotege · 27/12/2015 20:14

"If I am going to drive for 5 hours to collect her children the least she can do is ensure they are fed for the bloody journey"

So they're not your dp's girls too? Just hers?