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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think if you have an assistance dog....

229 replies

MeggyMooAndTinkerToo · 09/05/2015 22:18

That people who visit your home need to understand they cannot demand you put them in another room or outside?

I have an assistance dog (she's a hearing dog) and my constant companion. DD's boyfriends mother came to collect some hay from us tonight. She KNEW about the dog yet felt the need to comment "Oh, does it have to be in the livingroom?" "Can't you put it out?" This is the first time I've met the woman. She kept talking to DD and DH as if I wasnt there asking THEM if they could put Ruby out. DD was mortified and DH said "no I won't put Ruby out she stays with Meggy constantly, anyway ask Meggy not us." She made her excuses and then left. I feel like some sort of non existent being as she barely acknowledged me. I can honestly say I've never been in a situation like this before.

OP posts:

GraysAnalogy · 09/05/2015 22:20

Ignorant and rude woman!

I won't even put my non-assistance dog away unless there's children that are worried or people with genuine phobias.

YANBU

siscaza · 09/05/2015 22:21

Wow how utterly ignorant of the woman! My sister has a hearing dog and I think some people don't see her dog as being the same as a guide dog for the blind

Passmethecrisps · 09/05/2015 22:21

She is a complete bint clearly and has no concept of manners let alone issues relating to support dogs and/or disabilities.

If she comes round again insist she stays outside as she upsets the dog

MammaTJ · 09/05/2015 22:22

Clearly YANBU! You have lovely people around you though who protect you as much as they can from the ignorance of others!

SecretNutellaFix · 09/05/2015 22:24

How rude of the woman to treat you like you didn't exist.

PacificDogwood · 09/05/2015 22:25

Of course YANBU!
What a shockingly rude and/or ignorant woman

Just as well that Ruby won't have cared….
to you.

Chippednailvarnish · 09/05/2015 22:26

Can you teach Ruby to piss on demand?

Your guest sounds ignorant as pig shit.

KurriKurri · 09/05/2015 22:27

She sounds awful and dreadfully rude, - and its odd, I would assume if she was coming to collect hay, she has animals and would be an animal lover. How strange.
My friend's assistance dog is always in the room when I visit her - I couldn't imagine asking for him to be put out of the room even though he isn't technically on duty when he is in the house and lies in his basket, he is her partner and an important member of her household, and quite rightly he sits in on everything.
Speaking to your DH and DD as if you weren't there is appalling, what a strange woman !

ooerrmissus · 09/05/2015 22:27

Yeah next time get her to stay outside. Tell her Ruby is allergic to fuckwits.

Passmethecrisps · 09/05/2015 22:27

We have a chum who uses the command "busy busy" upon which the guide dog takes a dump.

Koalafications · 09/05/2015 22:28

My goodness! What an utter twat.

I hope that your DD's BF is a more respectful person than his mother.

Chippednailvarnish · 09/05/2015 22:30

Busy busy!

I'd pay to see Ruby take a dump on your guest.

IfYouWereARiverIdLearnToFloat · 09/05/2015 22:32

What a horrible woman!

Regardless of being an assistance dog, why would a stranger think they can come into your house & tell you what to do with your dog?? And the way she treated you is so cringey & insulting. I hope her DS is much nicer.

Mrsjayy · 09/05/2015 22:32

Wow horrible ignorant cow not only did she dismiss your dogs job she spoke over you

Busy Busy is the universal guide dog poop command my aunt trains the puppys and she busy busys them

JoanHickson · 09/05/2015 22:35

Can you tell her Son she is out of order and you won't tolerate that behaviour?

Topseyt · 09/05/2015 22:35

Very ignorant of her, and especially as she had come to your house in the first place. You go to someone's house, you accept their dog. End of story. Especially so if that dog is an assistance dog.

Assistance dogs of any type (guide dogs, hearing dogs and assistance dogs for people with other medical requirements) are essential to their owners. There are many people who have been given their lives back by assistance dogs.

I have pet dogs, not assistance dogs. If she or anyone like her came to my house and tried to dictate to me where they should be without very good reason (fear, allergy, worry about new baby/toddlers in same room) then they would get short shrift from me.

MrsGentlyBenevolent · 09/05/2015 22:38

I can't... That's just... What an ignorant cock she is .

Topseyt · 09/05/2015 22:39

Tell her Ruby is allergic to fuckwits

Brilliant response. You absolutely have to give her this one.

QueenofLouisiana · 09/05/2015 22:39

Stupid woman! Of course Ruby should be with you, she is a valued family member and part of your support network.

My mutt isn't an assistance dog and I won't put her out unless there's a very good reason for it. My dog lives in the house- visitors (hopefully not regular ones in this case) don't.

Passmethecrisps · 09/05/2015 22:39

I love that this is universal!!

I just thought it was our chum.

Seriously though, if you cannot put your own vacuous wants aside for someone's sensory needs then you are a total bellend and deserve a steamy busy busy on your shoes

Original poster

MeggyMooAndTinkerToo · 09/05/2015 22:41

She has a rabbit and DD's BF had asked if she could come up for some. I made scones and Victoria bloody sponge for her coming up too! The funny thing was she probably didn't realise I'm an expert at lip reading . I like the idea of leaving her outside next time! I was so upset earlier that she virtually ignored me. I've never experienced anyone blatantly ignoring me like that.

Pass Rubes "goes" when she's told as well. It took DH an eternity to realise she only "goes" with a hand signal it was really funny to watch him stay outside for up to half an hour in the freezing cold until I gave in and showed him . She had loads of fun in jthe snow though!

OP posts:

lunalelle · 09/05/2015 22:42

Don't let her come in again. My animals sit where they like and anyone who objects is welcome to not be in my house :)

NeverGoOutOfStyle · 09/05/2015 22:43

If someone carried on about my pet dog like that they'd be shown the bloody door! She certainly is much more polite than any guest in my house who behaves that way! (the dog that is) I can't believe someone could behave like that about a pet dog let alone an assistant dog, do say next time she must stay outside because she upsets the dog, put her in her bloody place!

Also yes, Busy Busy is our universal 'do your business' word for guide dogs, I had one pup once who just did not get it, if you took him outside and said 'busy busy' he used to just look at you like 'who is this fella you're always talking about?' and just did not put two and two together until he was almost 1! Hasn't done him much harm though, he is a guide dog now.

lunalelle · 09/05/2015 22:43

Also ignorant people with no deaf awareness are also welcome to stay out.

PacificDogwood · 09/05/2015 22:47

Yep, 'busy' and 'busy busy' here too - for our nice-but-dim totally-useless and non-assistance pet dog

Love the hand signal story - you so easily and discretely 'allow' her to go on Ignorant Woman's shoes the next time she visits - IF she is every invited again, that is.

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